A mere two weeks ago, TNA decided to drum up interest in their product by putting on a PPV entirely dedicated to the memory of a promotion that died nine years ago, but due to legal purposes, they couldn't exactly advertise the name of said promotion. Yep, I'm talking about Hardcore Justice, which featured the former stars of ECW. Back in the day, I was as big a fan of ECW as anyone else, but I really had no interest in watching this show at all. However, I was talking about it with my brother and Canon Review reader Ben, and he challenged me to watch the show and write up a review on the proceedings. Well, a challenge is a challenge, so without further adieu, here is TNA's Hardcore Justice. Justice for what, exactly? I'm not sure, but nevertheless.
We open with a montage of the ECW stars that will be here tonight, with voiceovers of the wrestlers explaining how important ECW was to them without actually mentioning ECW. Former ECW ring announcer Stephen Deangelis introduces Taz to start off the show. Taz says that over the past few years, there has been some haters of ECW, saying they were only about violence. He goes on to say that 'they' were the little engine that could and they did. Did what, exactly? Well, according to Taz ECW revolutionized the business, and that's a shoot. Taz then tells the haters to kiss his ass or something and the former Human Suplex Machine goes to join his partner Mike Tenay to call tonight's action. Nothing says hardcore wrestling more than Mike Tenay. Up first is a six man tag between the Full Blooded Italians (Tony Marmaluke nee Tony Luke, Guido Maritato, and Tracey Smothers w/ Sal E. Graziano) vs the team of Kid Kash, Simon Diamond, and Johnny Swinger. Unfortunately, the Musketeer does not accompany them to ringside. Sal E. has lost some weight over the years, not a lot, but some, and apparently he gave that weight to Simon Diamond. For some reason, the lights surrounding the ring are dark blue, making it very dark in the arena. The match starts with Guido and Kash exchanging holds, than Swinger and Luke get in and Swinger hits a sick backdrop driver on Luke. Both men tag out, to Smothers and Diamond respectively, and Smothers brawls with Diamond some before a jumping heel kick sends Diamond to the outside. Simon gets the mic and explains that "Simon has a problem". Well, you don't have to tell us twice. Simon blames Kid Kash for their troubles, and then challenges the FBI to a dance-off. Simon and Swinger display some of the worst dancing I have ever seen. Smothers gets on the mic and says that if the FBI can't do better than that than "everybody dies". OK then. The FBI bust some rather interesting dance moves before Simon and Swinger get tired of it and attack them from behind. Simon and Swinger go after Big Sal, but Sal clotheslines both men down to the mat. Everybody starts brawling on the outside, which allows Kid Kash to take everyone out with a suicide dive after the referee conveniently went to his knees so Kash can launch himself off his back. The match continues, and everybody starts to do their signature moves. After a minute or two, everybody gets in the ring to fight it out. Luke goes to the top rope, but Kash and Swinger catch him and set him up for the superplex. Guido and Smothers then come up behind Kash and Swinger and pick them up on their shoulders, resulting in a mega superplex for poor Tony Luke. Simon comes in and hits the Simon Series on Guido, but is clotheslined down by Smothers. Swinger gets back up and hits Smothers with the Skull Crushing Finale, but Luke catches Swinger with a missle dropkick. Kash hits the Moneymaker (double underhook piledriver) on Luke, which impresses both the crowd and the announcers. Guido kicks Kash in the gut, goes to the second rope and hits the Sicilian Slice on Kash. Simon goes to pick Guido up, but Guido goes behind and hits the Kiss of Death (Killswitch, Unprettier, etc) on Simon to get the three count. The match had its moments, but overall wasn't too good. I'll give it a 1.75 out of 5.
The announcers tell us that Jerry Lynn will not be able to wrestle Rob Van Dam in the main event, so instead we get RVD vs. Sabu. Well, that could be good or be a complete trainwreck. We then get some pre-taped comments from Tod Gordon, Gary Wolfe from his car, and the Blue Meanie. Wolfe threatens that we haven't seen the last of the legendary Pitbull #1, and all three express their gratitude to the fans for making this possible. Another video is shown, this time of TNA stars expressing their memories of ECW. AJ Styles talks about the Dremaer-Sandman Singapore Cane match from 1994, while Angelina Love exclaims that she didn't watch much ECW until 2000 because Canada didn't get ECW until then. That was worth it. To the back, where Al Snow tells Head not to mention those three letters or otherwise they'll get sued. Stevie Richards and Nova show up, and Al asks Nova where his scooter is. They're really shooting now. One half of the legendary Phi Delta Slam is there dressed up as the Blue Meanie, and he does a rather convincing impression. For reasons unknown, Lupus shows up, but is told by Nova that he couldn't get him on the card. I just wonder, how many people remember Lupus? Hopefully he got paid.
CW Anderson comes to the ring for the next match, and EVERYBODY HERE COMES 2 COLD SCORPIO!!!. Unfortunately, he does not come out to that theme. Anderson looks nearly the same as he did 10 years ago. The match starts and CW tries to ground Scorpio, but Scorp keeps escaping. Standoff, Scorpio offers his hand for CW to shake, but CW spits at the offer and starts pounding away at his opponent. Scorpio sends CW out of the ring with a dropkick, and then hits a nice looking corkscrew plancha outside the ring. Back inside, Scorpio keeps the advantage until a big-time superkick from CW changes the tide. CW covers, but only gets two. CW then does some Anderson style work on the arm, but Scorpio is able to escape with a superkick out of a hammerlock. The two exchange blows, but CW wins that with a loud right hand. That only gets 2. Some more blows are exchanged until Scorpio whips CW in and hits a somersault kick on Anderson in the corner. Scorpio is on the second rope, and hits a front flip legdrop, but only gets two. Scorpio goes back up and tries a moonsault, but CW gets the knees up. Anderson spinebuster only gets two. After some forearms, Anderson comes off the rope, but eats a superkick for his trouble. Scorpio sets Anderson up, climbs to the top rope and finishes him with a moonsault leg drop. Afterwards, the two end up shaking hands and Scorpio raises CW's arm for a well fought match. Short, but pretty good none the less. I'd say a 3.05 out of 5.
More ECW memories from TNA stars are shown. Madison Rayne says nothing of significance, Matt Morgan talks about attending an ECW show at a bar he was bouncing at, while Ken Anderson says something about ECW bringing a new edge to wrestling. To the back, where Rob Van Dam and Bill Alfonso talk about RVD's decision to wrestle Sabu tonight. Fonzie, as the manager of both men, promises to call it right down the middle. Justin Cre, I mean, P.J. Polaco comes out for the next match to take on Stevie Richards, who is accompanied by Nova and the Blue Tillie. Lupus, meanwhile, is left in the back. If Stevie can have an entourage, why can't the man formerly known as Justin Credible have one? Surely, Jason and Nicole Bass would have shown up if they had only asked. Oh well. The two start off by exchanging blows and chops. They go to the outside, where Polaco suplexes Richards on the mat. Polaco goes back in, only to dive back out with a plancha on Richards. Back in, Polaco has Richards trapped in the corner, and then powerbombs Richards out of the corner to get a two count. Running DDT by Polaco also gets a two count. Richards launches a comeback, which ends when he launches Polaco outside of the ring, with Polaco landing face first on the stairs. Polaco gets back in, and Stevie keeps the advantage with a side slam and a sit-down powerbomb, but only gets a two count. Polaco connects with a superkick, which nearly gets a three-count. Undaunted, Polaco sets up Richards for That's Incredible, and connects. Cover, but Polaco unwisely gets up to jaw with Nova on the ring apron. Polaco then goes to tell Richards his old catchphrase, but Richards reminds Polaco that he can't use that anymore by kicking his head off with the Stevie Kick. That gets the three count. Polaco does not take losing well, and canes Richards a few times before the arena somewhat darkens. When the lights come back on, relatively speaking, The Sandman is in the ring, and he shows Polaco how to use a Singapore Cane, leaving Polaco laying in the ring. Match was decent, but nothing special. I'd give it a 2.2 out of 5.
A video of Francine is shown, who explains that she'd rather spend time with her daughter than show up for this show to be piledriven by Tommy Dreamer again. She thanks the fans and the other ECW wrestlers for supporting her over the years. A screen is shown paying tribute to all of the wrestlers that have since passed that once competed in the Philadelphia-Based extreme promotion. Up next is a Three Way Dance between three wrestlers with a long history between each other, Al Snow, Brother Runt (Spike Dudley) and Rhino. The match starts with a double headlock on Snow and Runt. Rhino sets up Runt for the gore, but Snow trips Rhino up from outside the ring. Back in, Snow hits a backbreaker on Runt. Eventually, Rhino and Snow find their way to the outside of the ring. Runt tries to hit a plancha on both of his opponents, but is caught by Snow and Rhino and thrown back over their heads to the entrance ramp. Snow and Rhino trade some moves back inside the rings, including Al's infamous series of trapping headbutts. Backstage, some TNA wrestlers are watching the action on a monitor. Well good for them. Snow grabs his but missed Runt, allowing Rhino to back suplex Snow down. Double-foot stomp from Runt on Snow. Acid Drop attempted by Runt on Rhino, but Rhino throws him off easily. Rhino charges Runt in the corner, but gets a boot in the face and then a headscissors takedown for his efforts. Runt fires forearms at both of his opponents and tries for a double Acid Drop, but gets thrown outside of the ring instead. Snow inadvertently knocks the ref down, but takes advantage by nailing Rhino with his Head, so to speak. Runt comes back with a chair, and throws it to Snow and dives down on the canvas, leaving Snow with the smoking gun. Not to be outdone, Snow hits the canvas with a chair and goes down to the mat as well, leaving all three men down and the referee confused as to what just happened. The ref gets up and removes the chair, Snow tries to take advantage by using his Head, but he misses. Acid Drop from Runt on Snow gets the three and eliminates Snow. But Rhino is getting up, and gores Runt to the canvas to get the victory. Taz compares Rhino's gore to a Jack Lambert tackle, which kind of shows Taz's age but I appreciate the reference nonetheless. Well, at least this match was short. 1.2 out of 5.
To the back, where Mick Foley takes a break from reading Hulk Hogan's book (seriously) to tell why he's the perfect choice to officiate tonight's Tommy Dreamer vs. Raven match. Meanwhile, some guy named Brutus Magnus talks about ECW some, while Chris Sabin shares his memory of watching the Sabu vs. Terry Funk barbed wire match, which made him a big-time fan of ECW. Sabin also mentions that RVD was his favorite wrestler to the point where he called himself Josh Van Dam while backyard wrestling with his friends. I also did some backyard wrestling back in the day and ripped off an ECW personality to come up with my wrestling name, Jim E. Dangerously. I think my name is better than Josh Van Dam, but that might be because I'm a little biased. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh yes, here come Axl Rotten and Balls Ma, I mean, Kahoneys. Kahoneys looks as if he's been on a two year meth bender. In other words, he looks about the same as he did before minus a few pounds. Kahoneys Mahoney says that he and Axl were the most hardcore tag team in wrestling history, and they challenge anyone in the back to take them on. Could this be the return of Da Baldies? No, instead Team 3D comes out with Joel Gertner wearing a hideous faux mink coat. Gertner then proceeds to introduce himself as only he can:
Afterwards, Brother Ray gets on the mic and says these people don't want to see us have a wrestling match, why not have a South Philly street fight? In Orlando, FL. Sure, why not? The match is on, as Brother Devon squares off with Axl while Ray and Kahoneys duke it out. All four men exchange moves and eventually end up brawling in the crowd, where I can't tell what's going on because it's so dark. Back in the ring, and somebody brought a bunch of weapons into the ring. Kahoneys uses a cookie sheet on Ray. He tries a leg drop from the second rope but Ray moves out of the way. Brother Ray uses a teflon skillett to slow Kahoneys down. Axl gets the cookie sheet and slams it into Ray's head. Devon comes back in and he and Axl brawl to the outside. Kahoneys leaves the ring, and comes back with a toy lightsaber. The hell? Devon throws Ray a lightsaber as the crowd chants "Use the Force". The two duel with the lightsabers, and Kahoneys wins by 'stabbing' Brother Ray in the gut. Kahoneys does his trademark series of punches, but before he can cap it off, Bubba grabs the lightsaber and slams Kahoneys in his kahoneys. Axl comes in, and a few moves are exchanged before everybody leaves the ring and comes back with steel chairs. Chair duel takes place, and Axl and Balls actually win one, but can't get the three count. They argue with referee John Finnegan and whip him in the ropes, but Finnegan ducks the double clothesline and attempts a clothesline of his own. That doesn't go well, but Team 3D saves the day by slamming chairs into the heads of Balls and Axl. Team 3D then does the WAZZZUPPP headbutt, which I don't think they ever did in the original ECW, but who cares, and Ray asks Devon to get the tables. Devon fails to do his job properly and comes back with only one table, but luckily Gertner has some lighter fluid, so Team 3D makes do and sets the table on fire. Ray picks Kahoneys up, and the two powerbomb him through the flaming table and get the victory. Afterwards, Ray gets on the mic and proclaims Team 3D the best of all-time, which draws some dissenters with a cartful of weapons in the form of the Gangstas, Mustafa and New Jack. The Gangstas attack Team 3D with a variety of weapons, including a hockey stick, which causes Taz to say that New Jack was a big Clark Gilles fan. I think the number of people watching this that know who Clark Gilles is is probably less than 100. New Jack gets a guitar, Gertner tries to come in and gets blasted with the guitar for his efforts. The two teams face off in a staredown and then they all, HUG? Really? I know this is a tribute show in all, but that was a little much to take. The match was a bad imitation of the old ECW Dudley Boys-Balls and Axl matches, which had a lot more intensity than this. I'll give it a 0.8 out of 5.
A video is shown of Raven talking about his kayfabed relationship with Tommy Dreamer that supposedly goes back some 30 odd years. Raven claims that Dreamer stole his girl and his family, so by golly Raven's going to steal Dreamer's moment at Hardcore Justice and do to him psychically what Dreamer did to him emotionally. More TNA stars give their memories of ECW, as Jesse Neal talks about attending a show in Florida and feeling the energy and the vibe, which was so different than any other wrestling show, especially the UWF. Kazarian talks about getting in the ring with guys like Chris Candido and Jerry Lynn during his training under Killer Kowalski, and how TNA's X-Division was largely based off of the Jerry Lynn-Rob Van Dam series of matches. Another video is shown of the originals talking about Joey Styles' impact on the company. Mick Foley comes out first as the next match begins. Raven comes out and says something to Tommy's wife, the former Beulah McGillicutty, and her daughters. Also, TNA President Dixie Carter just happens to be sitting next to the Dreamers. Dreamer comes out, and Taz mentions that Tommy is wearing the same boots that he wore in his last match against Raven. Will the boots come into play? We will find out.
Foley gives some instructions but Raven doesn't want to hear them as he gives Dreamer a kick to the groin. To the outside, and Raven Russian Leg Sweeps Tommy into the guardrail. Back to the ring, Raven sets up a chair in the corner, but that backfires as Tommy whips him into the chair and sends Raven back outside the ring. Tommy gets a soda and spits it in Raven's face, stealing Carlito's gimmick in the process. Back inside the ring, Tommy sets up two chairs, but that backfires as Raven does his patented drop-toe-hold into the chair on Dreamer, only this time he used two chairs. To the outside, and Dreamer takes a chairshot right to the head in front of his family. Dreamer's busted open, and the kids are taken by a staff member to the back. Back inside, and Raven sets up a chair, but this time it is Dreamer that does the drop-toe-hold instead to chair on Raven. A 'fan' has a sign that says, "Use This, Tommy" and Dreamer does, cracking Raven on the skull. Dreamer rips the tape off to reveal that the sign is actually a DEAD END sign. Now Raven is bleeding from the head. Dreamer gets a ladder and sets it in the corner across the second rope, than catapults Raven throat first into the ladder. Ouch. Dreamer sets Raven up on the top turnbuckle and stands on the ladder, but Raven counters, and crotches Dreamer across one of the ladder in a move that every man watching felt. Raven goes for the Evenflow DDT, but it is countered into a Spicoli Driver, which nearly puts Raven away. Undaunted, Dreamer hangs Raven in the tree of woe, puts the sign over his face, than does a sliding dropkick into the sign. These two are pulling out all the stops tonight. Dreamer goes under the ring for something, and comes up with a string of barbed wire. Dreamer uses the barbed wire and puts Raven in a crossface with the wire over his mouth! Just as Raven is about to give up, Nova and the Blue Tillie come in and take out Mick Foley for a few seconds, than attack Dreamer. Nova hits a Flatliner while Blue Tillie goes for a splash, but misses. Dreamer takes out both men with a DDT-neckbreaker combo. However, he left himself open for Raven, who kicks Dreamer in the gut and Evenflows him down to the mat. Cover, but Dreamer just barely kicked out in time. That leads to Foley and Raven arguing, and Foley finally snaps and punches Raven a few times before pulling out his patented sock and stuffing it down Raven's gullett. Lupus is here! He legdrops Dreamer from the top rope. This does not please Foley, as he wraps the barbed wire around his sock clad hand and delivers a mandiable claw to poor Lupus. That cannot feel good, even if it is somewhat gimmicked. Lupus leaves with blood pouring out of his mouth. Raven finds some handcuffs and uses them to tie Dreamer's hands behind his back. Uh oh, Raven's got a chair. Foley tells him to reconsider, but Raven blasts Dreamer in the back with a chair. That brings out Beulah Dreamer, who tries to convince her one-time beau (at least in the storyline) to show mercy. Raven hugs Beulah, but hits Dreamer with the chair anyway. Raven goes after Mrs. Dreamer with the chair, but thankfully Foley puts the kibosh to that. No good deed goes unpunished, as Mick takes a chair to the back. Raven goes back to stalking Dreamer and Beulah, but Beulah hits a low blow, and Dreamer gets up and somehow DDTs Raven while handcuffed. Cover, but Raven just gets out at three. Raven kicks Dreamer in his bum knee, and then Evenflows him head first into the chair. Foley reluctantly counts three and Raven has defeated Tommy Dreamer once again. This was probably the closest thing to an ECW match this show has had so far. Even though there were some slow points, I actually quite liked this match, so I'll give it a 3.6 out of 5.
To the back where Jeremy Borash and So Cal Val are plugging the website when the Gangstas appear. New Jack informs So Cal Val that "once you go black, you get bad credit" and Mustafa leaves with Val. New Jack then casually informs JB that he is now 'his bitch'. Well, what a charming segment that was. Our last video package of the day shows the originals talking about the impact Paul Heyman had on their careers. Rob Van Dam comes out to his crappy TNA Theme. The fans seem to enjoy it, but personally I prefer this version instead. Bill Alfonso comes out with RVD, but runs to the ramp in order to accompany Sabu to the ring. Wow, he really does call it right down the middle. Sabu is now completely bald, which actually makes him look more menacing than before, but it was a shock to see at first. The match starts with RVD stalling Larry Zbyszko style. The two exchange a hold or two, break it up, then one of the two point either in the air or at themselves. Finally, Alfonso throws a chair in the ring, which Sabu uses to throw in Van Dam's face. Van Dam ends up in the crowd. Sabu sets the chair up and does a triple jump plancha over the guardrail onto Van Dam. Back in the ring, Sabu slows Van Dam down with a half camel-clutch. Sabu whips Van Dam into the corner and sets up the chair, but Van Dam is able to kick the chair into Sabu's legs, stopping his momentum. RVD with a monkey flip into the chair, than he picks up the chair and throws it at Sabu. That gets a two count. RVD whips Sabu into the corner, but Sabu counters with a clothesline. Sabu whips RVD into another corner, they both try to springboard kick each other but end up colliding in mid air. Both men are down, and Alfonso comes in to give Sabu a bottle of water. He also presents Van Dam with a bottle, and the two take a break as the fans chant "Water Break". These TNA fans spent the entire freaking show coming up with stupid chants, to the point where I can still hear them in my head. If somebody came out eating Fig Newtons, those fans would probably chant "FIIIG NEEW-TONS", but I digress.
After the impromptu water break, both men go to opposite sides outside the ring and dig up a table. Van Dam catches up to Sabu and catches him with a kick off the apron. Van Dam sets up Sabu on the guardrail and delivers a corkscrew legdrop from the apron. The carnage continues as Van Dam sets up Sabu on the apron, sets a chair onto Sabu's throat, and hits a slingshot legdrop on the chair. Van Dam goes to the top rope, but Sabu throws a chair into his face, crotching Van Dam. Sabu with a nice huracanrana that sends Van Dam flying onto the chair. Arabian Facebuster gets a two count for Sabu. Sabu goes to make him humble with the Camel Clutch. Sabu attempts a triple-jump moonsault, but Van Dam throws another chair into Sabu's face. Sabu is crotched on the top rope. Alfonso comes in to hold a chair in front of Sabu and RVD kicks it in Sabu's face, which Taz calls the Van Assasinator. Split-Legged moonsault from RVD, but Sabu kicks out. RVD sets up a table, and Sabu once again throws a chair into Van Dam, once in his back and once in his face. Van Dam catches Sabu with a kick, sets up a chair on him, and hits Rolling Thunder, hurting both Sabu and himself in the process. Cover, that gets a two count. Sabu's down in the corner, allowing Van Dam to dropkick a chair into his face for another two count. A series of reversals ends when Sabu delivers a nice springboard off the ropes into a tornado DDT on a chair. Arabian Facebuster from the second rope by Sabu, once again drawing a two count. Sabu sets up RVD on a table, and tries for the top rope Arabian Facebuster again, but Van Dam moves and Sabu goes through the table instead. Five-Star Frog Splash on Sabu, and RVD gets the victory. After the match, Sabu and RVD hug and Sabu lifts' RVD's arm up in the air. All the ECW guys come out with beers, and Dreamer offers his thanks to the fans, to the wrestlers, to Atlas Security and TNA President Dixie Carter, who is brought into the ring by Brother Ray. Dreamer says that this was "one hell of an F'n PPV". Well, I'm glad he liked it at least. As for the match, it took a while to get going, but at least they hit all of their spots. Still, it kind of lacked a certain something. I'll give it a 2.5 out of 5.
Overall, this show wasn't quite as bad as I feared it would be. There were two or three solid matches, mixed in with a couple of matches that I could have done without. This show wasn't as good as the first One Night Stand in 2005, but it wasn't too bad of a show. Even the announcing of Mike Tenay wasn't too annoying, although I wish the fans would stop chanting and actually react to what's happening in the ring. Overall, I'd give it a 5.7 out of 10. Thanks for reading, and if you have any comments about this post or ideas for future posts, than send them this way either by commenting or by e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com.
Showing posts with label Raven. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Raven. Show all posts
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Canon Wrestling Review: ECW Hardcore TV, February 27, 1997
The second of two posts about ECW shows in the last 24 hours. Let's see if this show is any good, shall we?
- We start from Cyberslam 1997 with Joey Styles in the ring, who brings out the Pitbulls for an interview. Pitbull #1 (Gary Wolfe) has just recently come back from a broken neck, and wants revenge on the man that broke his neck, Shane Douglas. Wolfe compares Shane Douglas to Shawn Michaels, which apparently is fightin' words in ECW, because the Franchise gets on the mic from a stage in the arena. Douglas curses about 11 times in two minutes, because nobody in wrestling could work in swear words like The Franchise. Really, Taz is the only other wrestler that comes close to working in swears to Douglas. Douglas invites the Pitbulls to take him on up on the stage, and the Pitbulls follow, but Douglas's Triple Threat members Chris Candido and Brian Lee are lying in wait, and the three take out the Pitbulls. Lee chokeslams Pitbull 2 through a table, and the Triple Threat stand proud over their fallen foes.
- Up next is a Tables and Ladders Tag Team Match from Cyberslam 1997 with the Eliminators (John Kronus and Perry Saturn) defending their ECW Tag Team titles against the team of Sabu and Rob Van Dam.We get a handshake between Van Dam and the Eliminators at the beginning of the match, while Sabu does his trademark point to the sky pose. The match starts with Van Dam and Saturn trading holds, the two then start to trade punches. Van Dam with a standing dropkick gets two, Kronus and Sabu are tagged in, and since both of these men are a little crazy, Styles expects wackiness between the two. Instead the two trade some holds and Kronus eventually gets the advantage with a uranage suplex. That gets two. Sabu puts Kronus in a camel clutch, but Saturn dives off the top with a clothesline to break the hold. Saturn tags in, but Sabu regains the advantage with some punches. Sabu tags in RVD, puts Saturn in a camel clutch and holds him while Van Dam dropkicks him in the face, nearly breaking Saturn's nose in the process. That gets two. Both men are up, and Van Dam and Saturn attempt hammerlocks before Saturn gets the advantage and crotches Van Dam on the top rope. Saturn with a springboard clothesline to the outside and RVD is down. Saturn gets a ladder, but Van Dam is up. While the two fight for the ladder, Sabu dropkicks the ladder into both men, and the fight is now ON! Both teams brawl on the outside for a couple of minutes, Sabu gets whipped into a wall at one point. Now everyone is back in, and Sabu throws a chair at Saturn. Triple Jump Moonsault by Sabu gets two. Van Dam with a moonsault off the second rung of the ladder gets two. Sabu and RVD place Saturn on the ladder and sets up for Rolling Thunder. It connects, but Kronus breaks up the pin. Van Dam gets kicked in the face by Saturn, and gets the ladder thrown into him. Saturn sets the ladder in a corner, whips RVD in, than tags Kronus, who does a double springboard elbow. Sabu breaks up the count, while Saturn returns with another ladder. Saturn just throws the ladder straight into the side of RVD's head. That probably hurt. Saturn sets up the ladder in the corner, whips RVD in, but Van Dam reverses and Saturn goes down after hitting the ladder. RVD has Saturn in a Surfboard, and Sabu dives off the top and clips Saturn in the chest, barely connecting. Sabu uses a ladder to hit the Arabian Face Buster on Saturn, but Kronus breaks up the count. Sabu is tagged in, the two try to double clothesline Saturn, but Saturn delivers clothesline to both men. Saturn is still down, so Sabu gets up and slingshots himself from the apron to do a flipping leg drop. That gets two. Kronus is tagged, and the Eliminators tag Sabu with double superkicks. Kronus with a bodyslam and a twisting senton on Sabu, but RVD breaks up the fall with a dropkick to Kronus. Falcon arrow by Saturn on Sabu, but Sabu kicks out. Somehow Saturn and Sabu end up in the crowd, while Kronus gets whipped into the corner, where a ladder has been set up. RVD runs into Kronus but gets dumped over the top rope, while Sabu dives onto Saturn. These guys look tired. On the other side, Van Dam does a moonsault off the guardrail onto a standing Kronus. Back in the ring, Saturn hits a Frankensteiner on Sabu. That gets a two count. Van Dam and Kronus come back in, and Van Dam gets body slammed. The Eliminators set up a six foot ladder, and Saturn dives off the top onto Van Dam. It would have been more impressive if Saturn did that off the top turnbuckle, but oh well. Sabu dropkicks the ladder into Saturn, drags Kronus outside of the ring and sets him up on a table. He then slingshot leg drops Kronus through the table. Van Dam takes forever to set up the next spot. He puts a ladder in the corner draped over two ropes, sets Saturn on it, ducks under the ladder to get on the top turnbuckle and attempts a split-legged moonsault onto Saturn. He ends up overshooting his target and nearly land head-first onto Saturn. Nice try, but that would be nearly impossible to hit perfectly. Sabu and Van Dam with slingshot kicks onto Saturn, Kronus breaks up the cover with his fist. Saturn eats another slingshot kick from Sabu, than Van Dam sets him up in the corner, and the two do the "Whisper in the Wind" move that the Hardys lifted from their repertoire. Van Dam tries to catch Saturn with a kick, but nearly hits Sabu instead. The two stare at each other, which allows Saturn to dropkick RVD into Sabu. The Eliminators hit two sloppy looking Total Eliminations on RVD and get the victory. Post match, the Eliminators shake hands with Sabu, but RVD refuses, and he and Sabu have words. I see what they were trying to do with this match, but somewhere in the middle it kind of fell apart and became a spotfest, and not a very good one at that. I'll give it a 1.7 out of 5.
- Taz comes out with Bill Alfonso and some jokers wearing "Team Taz" merchandise. He's here to wrestle Tracey Smothers in another match from Cyberslam. This is Smothers' first match at the ECW Arena, and he gets a mixed reaction. Taz starts the match by slapping Smothers straight in the face. This causes Smothers to get angry and the two start trading blows on the ground. Front headlock Taz plex from Taz gets a two count. Smothers is able to keep Taz off balance with a series of punches and kicks, and uses a sunset flip and a flying body press to get a pair of two counts. Jawjacker elbow (hey, that what Styles called it, so I'll go with it) from Smothers gets a two count. Smothers whips Taz in, but Taz ducks a clothesline, goes behind Smothers and hits him with a German Suplex. That spells the beginning of the end for Smothers, as Taz gives Smothers a T-Bone suplex before sinking in the Tazmission, causing Smothers to tap out. Short match that showcased Taz and gave Smothers some credibility. I'll give it a 2.3 out of 5.
- Chris Candido does an interview saying he could be a hardcore legend just like Terry Funk. Candido does a good Terry Funk impression, I must say. Raven and Brian Lee come out to the ring. The Eagles' "Desperado" plays and Terry Funk and Tommy Dreamer come out to the ring for a big time tag team match. The stipulation is that if Terry Funk pins Raven, than he gets a shot at Raven's ECW Title at Barely Legal, ECW's first pay-per-view coming up about two months after this. The introductions are given in the match starts, but Raven grabs a microphone. He says to Tommy that Dreamer hasn't pinned him in two years, but tonight Raven will let Tommy pin him, if he wants to cost his mentor Funk a shot at the World Title. Raven says Tommy doesn't have the stones to do it, which sends Tommy into a rage, punching a prone Raven. Back up, Dreamer hits a powerslam on Raven and covers him, but quickly gets up because he can't cost Funk his title shot, even though he's become obsessed with beating Raven. Tommy's dilemma will continue next time, because that's all the time for this week.
Well, this show featured a rather lengthy title match and Taz doing his thing, so it wasn't all bad. But I liked the show I watched earlier a little better than this. I'll give it a 6 out of 10. Thanks for reading, and if you have any thoughts about this post or about ECW in general, or ideas for future posts, than share them by leaving a comment on the blog, or send me an e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com.
- We start from Cyberslam 1997 with Joey Styles in the ring, who brings out the Pitbulls for an interview. Pitbull #1 (Gary Wolfe) has just recently come back from a broken neck, and wants revenge on the man that broke his neck, Shane Douglas. Wolfe compares Shane Douglas to Shawn Michaels, which apparently is fightin' words in ECW, because the Franchise gets on the mic from a stage in the arena. Douglas curses about 11 times in two minutes, because nobody in wrestling could work in swear words like The Franchise. Really, Taz is the only other wrestler that comes close to working in swears to Douglas. Douglas invites the Pitbulls to take him on up on the stage, and the Pitbulls follow, but Douglas's Triple Threat members Chris Candido and Brian Lee are lying in wait, and the three take out the Pitbulls. Lee chokeslams Pitbull 2 through a table, and the Triple Threat stand proud over their fallen foes.
- Up next is a Tables and Ladders Tag Team Match from Cyberslam 1997 with the Eliminators (John Kronus and Perry Saturn) defending their ECW Tag Team titles against the team of Sabu and Rob Van Dam.We get a handshake between Van Dam and the Eliminators at the beginning of the match, while Sabu does his trademark point to the sky pose. The match starts with Van Dam and Saturn trading holds, the two then start to trade punches. Van Dam with a standing dropkick gets two, Kronus and Sabu are tagged in, and since both of these men are a little crazy, Styles expects wackiness between the two. Instead the two trade some holds and Kronus eventually gets the advantage with a uranage suplex. That gets two. Sabu puts Kronus in a camel clutch, but Saturn dives off the top with a clothesline to break the hold. Saturn tags in, but Sabu regains the advantage with some punches. Sabu tags in RVD, puts Saturn in a camel clutch and holds him while Van Dam dropkicks him in the face, nearly breaking Saturn's nose in the process. That gets two. Both men are up, and Van Dam and Saturn attempt hammerlocks before Saturn gets the advantage and crotches Van Dam on the top rope. Saturn with a springboard clothesline to the outside and RVD is down. Saturn gets a ladder, but Van Dam is up. While the two fight for the ladder, Sabu dropkicks the ladder into both men, and the fight is now ON! Both teams brawl on the outside for a couple of minutes, Sabu gets whipped into a wall at one point. Now everyone is back in, and Sabu throws a chair at Saturn. Triple Jump Moonsault by Sabu gets two. Van Dam with a moonsault off the second rung of the ladder gets two. Sabu and RVD place Saturn on the ladder and sets up for Rolling Thunder. It connects, but Kronus breaks up the pin. Van Dam gets kicked in the face by Saturn, and gets the ladder thrown into him. Saturn sets the ladder in a corner, whips RVD in, than tags Kronus, who does a double springboard elbow. Sabu breaks up the count, while Saturn returns with another ladder. Saturn just throws the ladder straight into the side of RVD's head. That probably hurt. Saturn sets up the ladder in the corner, whips RVD in, but Van Dam reverses and Saturn goes down after hitting the ladder. RVD has Saturn in a Surfboard, and Sabu dives off the top and clips Saturn in the chest, barely connecting. Sabu uses a ladder to hit the Arabian Face Buster on Saturn, but Kronus breaks up the count. Sabu is tagged in, the two try to double clothesline Saturn, but Saturn delivers clothesline to both men. Saturn is still down, so Sabu gets up and slingshots himself from the apron to do a flipping leg drop. That gets two. Kronus is tagged, and the Eliminators tag Sabu with double superkicks. Kronus with a bodyslam and a twisting senton on Sabu, but RVD breaks up the fall with a dropkick to Kronus. Falcon arrow by Saturn on Sabu, but Sabu kicks out. Somehow Saturn and Sabu end up in the crowd, while Kronus gets whipped into the corner, where a ladder has been set up. RVD runs into Kronus but gets dumped over the top rope, while Sabu dives onto Saturn. These guys look tired. On the other side, Van Dam does a moonsault off the guardrail onto a standing Kronus. Back in the ring, Saturn hits a Frankensteiner on Sabu. That gets a two count. Van Dam and Kronus come back in, and Van Dam gets body slammed. The Eliminators set up a six foot ladder, and Saturn dives off the top onto Van Dam. It would have been more impressive if Saturn did that off the top turnbuckle, but oh well. Sabu dropkicks the ladder into Saturn, drags Kronus outside of the ring and sets him up on a table. He then slingshot leg drops Kronus through the table. Van Dam takes forever to set up the next spot. He puts a ladder in the corner draped over two ropes, sets Saturn on it, ducks under the ladder to get on the top turnbuckle and attempts a split-legged moonsault onto Saturn. He ends up overshooting his target and nearly land head-first onto Saturn. Nice try, but that would be nearly impossible to hit perfectly. Sabu and Van Dam with slingshot kicks onto Saturn, Kronus breaks up the cover with his fist. Saturn eats another slingshot kick from Sabu, than Van Dam sets him up in the corner, and the two do the "Whisper in the Wind" move that the Hardys lifted from their repertoire. Van Dam tries to catch Saturn with a kick, but nearly hits Sabu instead. The two stare at each other, which allows Saturn to dropkick RVD into Sabu. The Eliminators hit two sloppy looking Total Eliminations on RVD and get the victory. Post match, the Eliminators shake hands with Sabu, but RVD refuses, and he and Sabu have words. I see what they were trying to do with this match, but somewhere in the middle it kind of fell apart and became a spotfest, and not a very good one at that. I'll give it a 1.7 out of 5.
- Taz comes out with Bill Alfonso and some jokers wearing "Team Taz" merchandise. He's here to wrestle Tracey Smothers in another match from Cyberslam. This is Smothers' first match at the ECW Arena, and he gets a mixed reaction. Taz starts the match by slapping Smothers straight in the face. This causes Smothers to get angry and the two start trading blows on the ground. Front headlock Taz plex from Taz gets a two count. Smothers is able to keep Taz off balance with a series of punches and kicks, and uses a sunset flip and a flying body press to get a pair of two counts. Jawjacker elbow (hey, that what Styles called it, so I'll go with it) from Smothers gets a two count. Smothers whips Taz in, but Taz ducks a clothesline, goes behind Smothers and hits him with a German Suplex. That spells the beginning of the end for Smothers, as Taz gives Smothers a T-Bone suplex before sinking in the Tazmission, causing Smothers to tap out. Short match that showcased Taz and gave Smothers some credibility. I'll give it a 2.3 out of 5.
- Chris Candido does an interview saying he could be a hardcore legend just like Terry Funk. Candido does a good Terry Funk impression, I must say. Raven and Brian Lee come out to the ring. The Eagles' "Desperado" plays and Terry Funk and Tommy Dreamer come out to the ring for a big time tag team match. The stipulation is that if Terry Funk pins Raven, than he gets a shot at Raven's ECW Title at Barely Legal, ECW's first pay-per-view coming up about two months after this. The introductions are given in the match starts, but Raven grabs a microphone. He says to Tommy that Dreamer hasn't pinned him in two years, but tonight Raven will let Tommy pin him, if he wants to cost his mentor Funk a shot at the World Title. Raven says Tommy doesn't have the stones to do it, which sends Tommy into a rage, punching a prone Raven. Back up, Dreamer hits a powerslam on Raven and covers him, but quickly gets up because he can't cost Funk his title shot, even though he's become obsessed with beating Raven. Tommy's dilemma will continue next time, because that's all the time for this week.
Well, this show featured a rather lengthy title match and Taz doing his thing, so it wasn't all bad. But I liked the show I watched earlier a little better than this. I'll give it a 6 out of 10. Thanks for reading, and if you have any thoughts about this post or about ECW in general, or ideas for future posts, than share them by leaving a comment on the blog, or send me an e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Canon Wrestling Review: ECW Hardcore TV, March 26, 1996
Sorry for yesterday's lack of activity, I had a lot to do and the whole day was just bonkers, so by the time I sat down on the computer, I was too exhausted to come up with anything to review. But fear not, as I plan on double dipping today, so you fine people get not just one, but two whole Canon Reviews! Isn't that exciting? What do you mean you don't care? Anyway, this review, as you could probably tell by the title, is an episode of ECW Hardcore TV, the weekly television show that ECW had back in the day. Since all the wrestling I've reviewed seems to be WCW shows, I wanted to switch it up a bit, and what better way to do that than watch some Extreme Championship Wrestling at the peak of their run. So I will, by golly. This episode was originally shown on March 26, 1996.
ECW Hardcore TV: March 26, 1996
We start with clips from a brawl taking place in the crowd between The Bruise Brothers and the unlikely duo of Tommy Dreamer and Shane Douglas. Somebody gets thrown through a door, one of the Bruise Brothers gets hit with half of a table by Dreamer, just another night at the ECW Arena. The ECW Intro plays, and Joey Styles welcomes us to the show. Styles starts by talking about Cactus Jack, who recently had wrestled his last match in ECW at the Big Ass Extreme Bash (great name, by the way) against Mikey Whipwreck.
Highlights of the Jack-Whipwreck match are shown. We start with Mikey hitting a Russian leg sweep on Jack on a chair. Mikey tries for a victory roll near the ropes, but Cactus dumps Mikey off his shoulders onto the timekeeper's table outside the ring. The table doesn't break, so Mikey just bounces off the table in what had to be a painful bump. Jack sets the table up against the ring post, and gives Mikey a back suplex onto the table, which once again does not break. That table's as tough as a two dollar steak. Inside the ring again, and Whipwreck has a chair. He hits Cactus as hard as possible in the head with the chair twice. Despite those hellacious chairshots, Cactus kicks out at two. We get some brawling out in the crowd, and Whipwreck snap suplexes Cactus on a stage. Mikey climbs up to a higher stage of the arena, and dives some eight to ten feet onto Cactus. Back inside, Whipwreck tries an aerial attack, but eats a Cactus Jack forearm on the way down. Cactus has a chair, and pounds a downed Mikey in the back three times with it. Cactus picks Mikey up, and piledrives him on a chair. OUCH! That gets three, and Cactus wins his last ECW match. Post-match, Cactus crawls after Mikey, who tries to scurry away like a scared child. But Cactus catches Whipwreck, picks him up on his feet, and raises Mikey's hand in a show of respect. As the song "New York, New York" plays (because Cactus is going to the WWF, which is based in New York). Cactus calls out the two men that "without them, there wouldn't be an ECW" One's a creative genius, while the other is a visionary. That's right, it's none other than . . . Stevie Richards and the Blue Meanie? The three then do one of the worst Rockettes dance routine in the history of mankind, and then embrace in the ring. Now that's an exit, there, a million, billion stars. Cactus Jack then went to the WWF, where he did okay for himself, all in all. I'll give this whole segment a 4.8 out of 5, good stuff here.
- It's time to sell some merchandise. Brian Pillman plugs his 1-900 hotline. Did anybody actually call his hotline? If so, let me know. Hey, you can buy a Sabu T-Shirt for the first time for 20 dollars, or an EC F'N W shirt. In between all of these ads, a highlight video of Cactus Jack is shown. The video ends with a screen that says "Cactus Jack, 1985-1996, Bang Bang, He's Dead". Jack would come back to life a year later, albiet in the WWF, but still. After all that, Joey introduces us to the next match, which also took place at the Big Ass Extreme Bash between the "last survivor of the Hart Dungeon" Chris Jericho and the "One-Man Crime Spree" Taz.
- Jericho comes out to "Electric Head part 2" by White Zombie, while Taz comes out to Kiss's "War Machine" with his manager, Bill Alfonso, who blows his whistle every three seconds. As you can imagine, that gets annoying quickly. The match starts, the two tie up, and Taz counters with a Fujiwara armbar. Jericho reaches the ropes, and the two tie up again, Jericho gets a top wrist-lock, but Taz bridges out. Taz tries a German suplex, but Jericho goes behind and hits a German of his own. That gets two. Taz goes to the outside, he climbs back on the apron, but Jericho hits a springboard dropkick from the turnbuckle, sending Taz back to the outside. Jericho runs to the turnbuckle and dives on Taz on the outside of the ring. Back in, Jericho does the Superfly splash and a Lionsault, but both moves only get two. Taz whips Jericho into the corner, goes for the German suplex again, but Jericho turns around, only to take a Northern Lights suplex. That gets two. Both men get up, and Jericho superkicks Taz. Jericho climbs to the top, but Taz catches him and sets him up for a super back suplex, but Jericho flips out of it and clotheslines Taz. Jericho whips Taz into the corner, but Taz bounces off and catches a running Jericho to deliver a T-Bone Taz plex. Jericho landed on his head after that move, and the referee calls for the bell. But Jericho gets up and demands a restart. He knocks Taz down, but after missing a punch, Taz German suplexes Jericho on the back of his head. That looked like it hurt. Taz locks in the Tazmission and Jericho has no choice to give up. Taz keeps the hold on, despite the best efforts of Little Guido and the Eliminators to break it up, but Brian Pillman, who Styles claimed helped train Jericho (never mind the fact that the two men hadn't met until 1996) comes in the ring and jumps around like a crazy man, causing Taz to let go and stare down Pillman. Taz then Germans Little Guido just because he can, and Pillman leaves, only to clothesline an oncoming El Puerto Ricano and back suplex him on the floor. That brings out Shane Douglas, who tries to get to Pillman but Pillman escapes through the crowd. Douglas and others check on Jericho while Taz leaves the ring. The match was pretty good, so I'll give it a 3.2 out of 5.
- The main event of the show is next, as Raven defends his ECW World Championship against Shane Douglas. Raven comes out on crutches and with his flunkies Stevie Richards and Blue Meanie. A video is shown highlighting the relationship between Douglas, Tommy Dreamer, and the Sandman, three rivals that have come together due to a common hatred of Raven. Douglas comes out, but before the match starts Richards gets the mic. He tells Raven not to wrestle because Raven has gout. Ok then. Raven says there will be no match tonight, but Douglas takes umbrage and hits Raven with the microphone. Richards with a Stevie kick, and both men are down at the start of the match. Raven hits his patented Evenflow DDT, but only gets two. To the outside, Raven throws Douglas agianst two guardrails and gives Douglas another Evenflow DDT, this time on a chair. Raven gets in the ring and tells the ref to count Douglas out. Douglas gets to the apron at eight, only to eat a kneelift by Raven. Douglas gets back up, only to receive a running punch from Raven. This time Douglas doesn't get back on the apron until the count of nine. Raven tries to suplex Douglas in, but Douglas counters and drapes Raven over the turnbuckle. Douglas knees Raven in the head and Raven flies to the outside. Douglas with a suicide dive on Raven's lackeys, and then turns his attention to Raven. Back in, Douglas with a chairshot on Raven, and a DDT on the chair for Raven. Raven's valet Kimona Wanalaya breaks up the count, but gets spanked for her efforts. Raven with a low blow and Douglas is down. Raven whips Douglas into the corner and charges after him with a chair, but Shane pulls the ref into his path. Raven knocks the ref down. Douglas hits Raven with his own crutch, and delivers belly-to-belly suplexes to Richards, Meanie, and Raven. But the ref is down. The Bruise Brothers come out and deliver a double big boot to Douglas. Raven with the cover, but it only gets two. Raven charges with a chair, but Douglas kicks it into Raven's face. Hotshot onto Raven gets a two count. Douglas sets up the chair, and atomic drops Raven onto it. A clothesline knocks Raven out of the chair, and gets a two count. Douglas tries to throw Raven head first into a chair in the corner, but Raven counters and throws Douglas into it. Evenflow on a chair by Raven, and that gets the three count. Post match, the Bruise Brothers come out and try to post Douglas crotch first, but Dreamer makes the save. Dreamer gets overwhelmed by the Bruise Brothers and Raven, but here comes The Sandman, with Singapore cane shots for both the Bruise Brothers, Raven, Stevie, and Meanie. Dreamer DDT's Raven, puts a chair on Raven's foot, and tries to take out Raven's gout ridden leg, but the Sandman stops him, indicating he wants to do it. While the two are arguing, Douglas dives off the top rope onto Raven's leg. Raven leaves while Douglas, Dreamer, and Sandman have a standoff. Match was a bit of a mess, but it was ok. I'll give it a 2.6 out of 5.
Well, that was fun. This show was a lot of fun to watch and showed what ECW was all about, a hard-hitting wrestling show with great characters such as Raven and Cactus Jack and interesting storylines. Overall, I'll give this episode a 7.4 out of 10. Thanks for reading, and if you have any thoughts about this post, or ideas for future posts, than let us know about them either by leaving a comment on the blog or by sending an e-mail to KtheC2001@gmail.com.
ECW Hardcore TV: March 26, 1996
We start with clips from a brawl taking place in the crowd between The Bruise Brothers and the unlikely duo of Tommy Dreamer and Shane Douglas. Somebody gets thrown through a door, one of the Bruise Brothers gets hit with half of a table by Dreamer, just another night at the ECW Arena. The ECW Intro plays, and Joey Styles welcomes us to the show. Styles starts by talking about Cactus Jack, who recently had wrestled his last match in ECW at the Big Ass Extreme Bash (great name, by the way) against Mikey Whipwreck.
Highlights of the Jack-Whipwreck match are shown. We start with Mikey hitting a Russian leg sweep on Jack on a chair. Mikey tries for a victory roll near the ropes, but Cactus dumps Mikey off his shoulders onto the timekeeper's table outside the ring. The table doesn't break, so Mikey just bounces off the table in what had to be a painful bump. Jack sets the table up against the ring post, and gives Mikey a back suplex onto the table, which once again does not break. That table's as tough as a two dollar steak. Inside the ring again, and Whipwreck has a chair. He hits Cactus as hard as possible in the head with the chair twice. Despite those hellacious chairshots, Cactus kicks out at two. We get some brawling out in the crowd, and Whipwreck snap suplexes Cactus on a stage. Mikey climbs up to a higher stage of the arena, and dives some eight to ten feet onto Cactus. Back inside, Whipwreck tries an aerial attack, but eats a Cactus Jack forearm on the way down. Cactus has a chair, and pounds a downed Mikey in the back three times with it. Cactus picks Mikey up, and piledrives him on a chair. OUCH! That gets three, and Cactus wins his last ECW match. Post-match, Cactus crawls after Mikey, who tries to scurry away like a scared child. But Cactus catches Whipwreck, picks him up on his feet, and raises Mikey's hand in a show of respect. As the song "New York, New York" plays (because Cactus is going to the WWF, which is based in New York). Cactus calls out the two men that "without them, there wouldn't be an ECW" One's a creative genius, while the other is a visionary. That's right, it's none other than . . . Stevie Richards and the Blue Meanie? The three then do one of the worst Rockettes dance routine in the history of mankind, and then embrace in the ring. Now that's an exit, there, a million, billion stars. Cactus Jack then went to the WWF, where he did okay for himself, all in all. I'll give this whole segment a 4.8 out of 5, good stuff here.
- It's time to sell some merchandise. Brian Pillman plugs his 1-900 hotline. Did anybody actually call his hotline? If so, let me know. Hey, you can buy a Sabu T-Shirt for the first time for 20 dollars, or an EC F'N W shirt. In between all of these ads, a highlight video of Cactus Jack is shown. The video ends with a screen that says "Cactus Jack, 1985-1996, Bang Bang, He's Dead". Jack would come back to life a year later, albiet in the WWF, but still. After all that, Joey introduces us to the next match, which also took place at the Big Ass Extreme Bash between the "last survivor of the Hart Dungeon" Chris Jericho and the "One-Man Crime Spree" Taz.
- Jericho comes out to "Electric Head part 2" by White Zombie, while Taz comes out to Kiss's "War Machine" with his manager, Bill Alfonso, who blows his whistle every three seconds. As you can imagine, that gets annoying quickly. The match starts, the two tie up, and Taz counters with a Fujiwara armbar. Jericho reaches the ropes, and the two tie up again, Jericho gets a top wrist-lock, but Taz bridges out. Taz tries a German suplex, but Jericho goes behind and hits a German of his own. That gets two. Taz goes to the outside, he climbs back on the apron, but Jericho hits a springboard dropkick from the turnbuckle, sending Taz back to the outside. Jericho runs to the turnbuckle and dives on Taz on the outside of the ring. Back in, Jericho does the Superfly splash and a Lionsault, but both moves only get two. Taz whips Jericho into the corner, goes for the German suplex again, but Jericho turns around, only to take a Northern Lights suplex. That gets two. Both men get up, and Jericho superkicks Taz. Jericho climbs to the top, but Taz catches him and sets him up for a super back suplex, but Jericho flips out of it and clotheslines Taz. Jericho whips Taz into the corner, but Taz bounces off and catches a running Jericho to deliver a T-Bone Taz plex. Jericho landed on his head after that move, and the referee calls for the bell. But Jericho gets up and demands a restart. He knocks Taz down, but after missing a punch, Taz German suplexes Jericho on the back of his head. That looked like it hurt. Taz locks in the Tazmission and Jericho has no choice to give up. Taz keeps the hold on, despite the best efforts of Little Guido and the Eliminators to break it up, but Brian Pillman, who Styles claimed helped train Jericho (never mind the fact that the two men hadn't met until 1996) comes in the ring and jumps around like a crazy man, causing Taz to let go and stare down Pillman. Taz then Germans Little Guido just because he can, and Pillman leaves, only to clothesline an oncoming El Puerto Ricano and back suplex him on the floor. That brings out Shane Douglas, who tries to get to Pillman but Pillman escapes through the crowd. Douglas and others check on Jericho while Taz leaves the ring. The match was pretty good, so I'll give it a 3.2 out of 5.
- The main event of the show is next, as Raven defends his ECW World Championship against Shane Douglas. Raven comes out on crutches and with his flunkies Stevie Richards and Blue Meanie. A video is shown highlighting the relationship between Douglas, Tommy Dreamer, and the Sandman, three rivals that have come together due to a common hatred of Raven. Douglas comes out, but before the match starts Richards gets the mic. He tells Raven not to wrestle because Raven has gout. Ok then. Raven says there will be no match tonight, but Douglas takes umbrage and hits Raven with the microphone. Richards with a Stevie kick, and both men are down at the start of the match. Raven hits his patented Evenflow DDT, but only gets two. To the outside, Raven throws Douglas agianst two guardrails and gives Douglas another Evenflow DDT, this time on a chair. Raven gets in the ring and tells the ref to count Douglas out. Douglas gets to the apron at eight, only to eat a kneelift by Raven. Douglas gets back up, only to receive a running punch from Raven. This time Douglas doesn't get back on the apron until the count of nine. Raven tries to suplex Douglas in, but Douglas counters and drapes Raven over the turnbuckle. Douglas knees Raven in the head and Raven flies to the outside. Douglas with a suicide dive on Raven's lackeys, and then turns his attention to Raven. Back in, Douglas with a chairshot on Raven, and a DDT on the chair for Raven. Raven's valet Kimona Wanalaya breaks up the count, but gets spanked for her efforts. Raven with a low blow and Douglas is down. Raven whips Douglas into the corner and charges after him with a chair, but Shane pulls the ref into his path. Raven knocks the ref down. Douglas hits Raven with his own crutch, and delivers belly-to-belly suplexes to Richards, Meanie, and Raven. But the ref is down. The Bruise Brothers come out and deliver a double big boot to Douglas. Raven with the cover, but it only gets two. Raven charges with a chair, but Douglas kicks it into Raven's face. Hotshot onto Raven gets a two count. Douglas sets up the chair, and atomic drops Raven onto it. A clothesline knocks Raven out of the chair, and gets a two count. Douglas tries to throw Raven head first into a chair in the corner, but Raven counters and throws Douglas into it. Evenflow on a chair by Raven, and that gets the three count. Post match, the Bruise Brothers come out and try to post Douglas crotch first, but Dreamer makes the save. Dreamer gets overwhelmed by the Bruise Brothers and Raven, but here comes The Sandman, with Singapore cane shots for both the Bruise Brothers, Raven, Stevie, and Meanie. Dreamer DDT's Raven, puts a chair on Raven's foot, and tries to take out Raven's gout ridden leg, but the Sandman stops him, indicating he wants to do it. While the two are arguing, Douglas dives off the top rope onto Raven's leg. Raven leaves while Douglas, Dreamer, and Sandman have a standoff. Match was a bit of a mess, but it was ok. I'll give it a 2.6 out of 5.
Well, that was fun. This show was a lot of fun to watch and showed what ECW was all about, a hard-hitting wrestling show with great characters such as Raven and Cactus Jack and interesting storylines. Overall, I'll give this episode a 7.4 out of 10. Thanks for reading, and if you have any thoughts about this post, or ideas for future posts, than let us know about them either by leaving a comment on the blog or by sending an e-mail to KtheC2001@gmail.com.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Wrestlemania One Match Wonders (Part 2)
Continuing where we left off yesterday
Match 4: ECW Originals (Rob Van Dam, Tommy Dreamer, Sandman, Sabu) vs. The New Breed (Elijah Burke, Kevin Thorn, Matt Striker, Marcus Cor Von), Wrestlemania 23
Of the eight men in this match, this would be the only Wrestlemania match for seven of them (although Striker's now a commentator and technically, has been on another Wrestlemania broadcast). The ECW Originals come out through the crowd to the original ECW music, while the New Breed have a more traditional entrance. The match starts with Sabu delivering a couple of springboard dropkicks on Striker, then setting up Striker for a guillotine legdrop by the Sandman. Burke and Dreamer come in, but Dreamer is distracted by Thorn's manager Ariel, allowing Burke to get the advantage. For the next few minutes, Burke, Cor Von, and Thorn take turns beating on Dreamer, before Dreamer finally comes back with a Nova-like DDT neckbreaker combo move on Burke and Cor Von. Dreamer gets the hot tag to RVD, who whoops up on Matt Striker, including a monkey flip with Striker flying through the air. RVD hits the Rolling Thunder on Striker, but Cor Von busts that up and goes to the outside, only to get dived on by Sabu. Dreamer comes in and DDT's Striker head first. Say what you want about him, but Striker's a heck of a bumper. All hell breaks loose as everyone but Striker ends up on the outside. RVD comes back in to frog splash a still downed Striker for the three count, giving the Originals a win over their foes. The Originals celebrates and Joey Styles is pleased. Match was just there, and you would think an eight man tag would be given more than six minutes, but what can you do? I'll give it a 2.4 out of 5.
Match 5: Big Show vs. Kane vs. Raven (c), Hardcore Title Match, Wrestlemania 17
This would be Raven's only Wrestlemania match, while the other two men have become mainstays of Wrestlemania, for better or worse, depending on how you feel about them. Raven comes out with a shopping cart full of weapons, including a potted plant for some reason. Kane comes out, and he and Raven start trading blows before the Big Show comes out. Now here comes the Big Show, in no particular hurry. This match is kind of nuts, as the three quickly find themselves in the backstage area. Raven gets thrown into a wall, while Kane gets slammed on wooden pallets by the Big Show. The two big men continue to fight each other to a standstill, while poor Raven gets beaten on constantly. Kane throws Raven through a window, but is caught by the Big Show, who tries to chokeslam Kane on the floor. That is thwarted, and eventually the two monsters end up going through a wall. Raven gets on a golf cart, but Show jumps on as well. Raven eventually crashes the cart and the two go brawling down the hallway. Meanwhile, Kane and a referee hop on another golf cart, following his opponents down the way. Eventually, the three end up on the entrance ramp, and Raven continues to get beaten on. The end comes when the Big Show overhead presses Raven, but eats a boot from Kane, causing both Show and Raven to fall through part of the stage. Kane than leaps off the ramp onto the Big Show with a legdrop, and gets the three count. This match was akin to Godzilla battling Mothra, with Raven playing the part of Tokyo. There were a few fun spots, so I'll give it a 3 out of 5.
Match 6: Billy Jack Haynes vs. Hercules (Full nelson Challenge), Wrestlemania 3
This is Billy Jack's only Wrestlemania match, in front of the largest crowd to ever see an American wrestling show. These two behemoths have been battling over who has the best full nelson, which is as good as any other reason to fight a guy, I suppose. Not surprisingly, this match is full of power moves. Haynes uses a gorilla press on Hercules, which was an impressive bump for Hercules to take considering his size. Hercules comes back though, using a back drop and a vertical suplex to ground his opponent. Hercules goes for the cover, but lifts up Haynes after two, because he want to put the Full Nelson on his foe. Hercules then uses his own gorilla press before putting on the Full Nelson. However, he doesn't have the fingers locked, so Haynes is able to escape. Double clothesline and both men are down. Haynes is up first, and uses a series of strikes and clotheslines to wound his opponent. Haynes does a second rope fist drop, and now is ready to sink in that Full Nelson. He tries, but Hercules gets to the ropes and both men go flying to the outside. Haynes then fully applies the Full Nelson on Hercules on the outside, but both men get counted out, making it a no contest. Haynes chases Herc's manager Bobby Heenan around, which allows Hercules to sneak up on Haynes and blast him with his chain wrapped fence. Herc continues the assault, drawing blood, before putting the Full Nelson on a downed Haynes, much to the disapproval of the fans. I guess this match was ok, but it was pretty boring. I'll give it a 1.7 out of 5.
Well, thanks for reading. I hope that you have enjoyed this review of Wrestlemania one match wonders. If you have any ideas for future reviews, or feedback on this blog, than either leave a comment or send me an e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com.
Match 4: ECW Originals (Rob Van Dam, Tommy Dreamer, Sandman, Sabu) vs. The New Breed (Elijah Burke, Kevin Thorn, Matt Striker, Marcus Cor Von), Wrestlemania 23
Of the eight men in this match, this would be the only Wrestlemania match for seven of them (although Striker's now a commentator and technically, has been on another Wrestlemania broadcast). The ECW Originals come out through the crowd to the original ECW music, while the New Breed have a more traditional entrance. The match starts with Sabu delivering a couple of springboard dropkicks on Striker, then setting up Striker for a guillotine legdrop by the Sandman. Burke and Dreamer come in, but Dreamer is distracted by Thorn's manager Ariel, allowing Burke to get the advantage. For the next few minutes, Burke, Cor Von, and Thorn take turns beating on Dreamer, before Dreamer finally comes back with a Nova-like DDT neckbreaker combo move on Burke and Cor Von. Dreamer gets the hot tag to RVD, who whoops up on Matt Striker, including a monkey flip with Striker flying through the air. RVD hits the Rolling Thunder on Striker, but Cor Von busts that up and goes to the outside, only to get dived on by Sabu. Dreamer comes in and DDT's Striker head first. Say what you want about him, but Striker's a heck of a bumper. All hell breaks loose as everyone but Striker ends up on the outside. RVD comes back in to frog splash a still downed Striker for the three count, giving the Originals a win over their foes. The Originals celebrates and Joey Styles is pleased. Match was just there, and you would think an eight man tag would be given more than six minutes, but what can you do? I'll give it a 2.4 out of 5.
Match 5: Big Show vs. Kane vs. Raven (c), Hardcore Title Match, Wrestlemania 17
This would be Raven's only Wrestlemania match, while the other two men have become mainstays of Wrestlemania, for better or worse, depending on how you feel about them. Raven comes out with a shopping cart full of weapons, including a potted plant for some reason. Kane comes out, and he and Raven start trading blows before the Big Show comes out. Now here comes the Big Show, in no particular hurry. This match is kind of nuts, as the three quickly find themselves in the backstage area. Raven gets thrown into a wall, while Kane gets slammed on wooden pallets by the Big Show. The two big men continue to fight each other to a standstill, while poor Raven gets beaten on constantly. Kane throws Raven through a window, but is caught by the Big Show, who tries to chokeslam Kane on the floor. That is thwarted, and eventually the two monsters end up going through a wall. Raven gets on a golf cart, but Show jumps on as well. Raven eventually crashes the cart and the two go brawling down the hallway. Meanwhile, Kane and a referee hop on another golf cart, following his opponents down the way. Eventually, the three end up on the entrance ramp, and Raven continues to get beaten on. The end comes when the Big Show overhead presses Raven, but eats a boot from Kane, causing both Show and Raven to fall through part of the stage. Kane than leaps off the ramp onto the Big Show with a legdrop, and gets the three count. This match was akin to Godzilla battling Mothra, with Raven playing the part of Tokyo. There were a few fun spots, so I'll give it a 3 out of 5.
Match 6: Billy Jack Haynes vs. Hercules (Full nelson Challenge), Wrestlemania 3
This is Billy Jack's only Wrestlemania match, in front of the largest crowd to ever see an American wrestling show. These two behemoths have been battling over who has the best full nelson, which is as good as any other reason to fight a guy, I suppose. Not surprisingly, this match is full of power moves. Haynes uses a gorilla press on Hercules, which was an impressive bump for Hercules to take considering his size. Hercules comes back though, using a back drop and a vertical suplex to ground his opponent. Hercules goes for the cover, but lifts up Haynes after two, because he want to put the Full Nelson on his foe. Hercules then uses his own gorilla press before putting on the Full Nelson. However, he doesn't have the fingers locked, so Haynes is able to escape. Double clothesline and both men are down. Haynes is up first, and uses a series of strikes and clotheslines to wound his opponent. Haynes does a second rope fist drop, and now is ready to sink in that Full Nelson. He tries, but Hercules gets to the ropes and both men go flying to the outside. Haynes then fully applies the Full Nelson on Hercules on the outside, but both men get counted out, making it a no contest. Haynes chases Herc's manager Bobby Heenan around, which allows Hercules to sneak up on Haynes and blast him with his chain wrapped fence. Herc continues the assault, drawing blood, before putting the Full Nelson on a downed Haynes, much to the disapproval of the fans. I guess this match was ok, but it was pretty boring. I'll give it a 1.7 out of 5.
Well, thanks for reading. I hope that you have enjoyed this review of Wrestlemania one match wonders. If you have any ideas for future reviews, or feedback on this blog, than either leave a comment or send me an e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com.
Monday, March 8, 2010
It's Time to talk TNA
I don't know if anybody's heard, but TNA is moving their tv show, Impact!, to Monday Nights starting tonight. In a futile attempt to re-start wrestling's famous Monday Night Wars, TNA has decided, what the hey, let's take on the WWE and their flagship show, Raw. Will I watch? No. But I do hope TNA succeeds, or at least does well enough to rattle the WWE some. After all, competition is good for business. I don't think TNA will succeed, but you never know. I want to like TNA, but they just make it so difficult, between their asinine booking and the belief that everybody that ever wrestled for the WWE or WCW should be instantly pushed over their home grown talent. TNA has shot themselves in the foot more than any other wrestling company out there. Every potential breakout star they cultivate, they find a way to screw it up. Whenever they should go one way, TNA usually goes the other way. I haven't watched a full TNA show in three years, partially because it was frustrating to watch, and partially because I really don't watch any current wrestling as a whole, for a myraid of reasons which I won't get into here.
However, since it's such a big day for TNA, I decided, what the heck, I'll watch a few TNA matches and do a review of them for this site. Hopefully there will be some good matches, and if they all suck, well, whatever doesn't kill me only makes be stronger. So win-win. Let's start the madness:
Match 1: Kurt Angle vs. Rhino, Final Resolution 2008 (Special Enforcer: Mick Foley)
They show a video package showing how the match was formed. See, Angle's group, the Main Event Mafia, put a beating on Rhino's friend Christian. Rhino wants revenge. Kurt Angle wants to wrestle Jeff Jarrett, but for some reason Jarrett won't wrestle him and Foley won't make the match. So the final result is Angle faces Rhino. If Angle wins, he gets to wrestle Jarrett at a later date. If Angle loses, he's fired. Well that hardly seems fair, now does it? Foley is here to make sure the Main Event Mafia doesn't interfere. So that's that. This match is rather boring, I must say. Angle hit a lot of different suplexes on Rhino that ultimately meant nothing. Angle put on his finisher, the Ankle Lock. Rhino lasted a full minute before countering out, which kind of killed off the move. Angle hit his other finisher, the Angle Slam, on Rhino, but Rhino kicked out at 2. So a mid-card wrestler can withstand both finishing moves of one of your top guys. That's smart. The best move of the match came when Rhino picked Angle up for a powerbomb, but instead of throwing him down, Rhino flipped him over his back so that Angle landed face-first on the top turnbuckle. Rhino went for his finisher, the Gore, about 6 times, but only hit it once, and that was on the referee. Once the ref goes down, Angle goes to get a chair, but is stopped by Foley. Rhino rolls up Angle for the 2 as Foley is now the official. Al Snow comes out for no particular reason, Mick Foley leans through the ropes to talk to him, but gets slapped by Al for his troubles. While Foley chases after Snow, Angle uses the chair on Rhino, than hits another Angle Slam. Foley gets back in and reluctantly delivers the three-count, giving Angle the victory and the opportunity to face Jeff Jarrett. Afterwards, Angle threatens his foes and drops an S-bomb. Good thing this is pay-per-view. Match wasn't terrible, but there was nothing that was too impressive, either. I give it a 2 out of 5.
Match 2: Jeff Hardy vs. Petey Williams, TNA Impact
Jeff Jarrett comes out with a ladder to do some commentary. Mike Tenay mentions that Jarrett and Hardy have an upcoming ladder match for the TNA Title, so that's why Jarrett has a ladder. Petey Williams comes out with Scott D'Amore. Jeff Hardy has a lame entrance song and seems to frothing at the mouth. But Jeff has to refused his rabies shot to get his hands on Petey. Match was about three minutes long, Hardy hit a couple of spots. Jarrett interferes, than AJ Styles interferes, doing his moonsault into reverse DDT maneuver on Petey Williams. Hardy gets the three count, and he and Styles head to the back triumphant. If these two were given 15 or 20 minutes, it could be a good match, or a huge trainwreck. As it is, it's just a match to set up future matches, nothing more. I'll say a 1.6830 out of 5, since everybody hit their moves.
Match 3: Raven vs. AJ Styles vs. Jeff Jarrett, NWA World Title Match
This match is for Jarrett's NWA Title. This match is from TNA's weekly pay-per-view era. There's also cagedancers, which is a little weird, but whatever. Jeff Jarrett has a bad titan tron, and an even worse shirt. If it were any tighter, Jeff Jarrett couldn't breathe. This is actually quite a good match, as everybody came in with their working boots on. Jarrett hit one of the best dropkicks I've ever seen on AJ early in the match. At first, everyone goes after everyone, but after Styles neutralizes Raven with a chair, Raven gets double teamed by his two opponents. That lasts until AJ guillotine leg drops Jarrett. Raven, now freed, becomes a House of Fire, battling his two opponents quite easily. He gives both men his trademark drop toe hold into a chair, and nearly gets the three on Styles before Jarrett breaks it up. After Styles gets knocked outside the ring, Raven gets Jarrett in the DDT position, wait Jarrett counters for a stroke, until Raven counters and hits the DDT on Jarrett. The referee goes to count, but Shane Douglas pulls Raven out of the ring to the shock of the announcers. He then beats Raven up and drags him out of the building, leaving us with Jeff and A.J. Styles nails Jarrett with the title belt, goes up top, and hits a D'Lo Brown style frog splash, Jarrett kicks out. Styles, charges, but Jarrett counters and throws Styles down HARD with an Alabama Slam type maneuver. Styles gets up, hist Jarrett with a sit out power bomb, but only gets two. Styles goes for the Styles clash, but Jarrett counters, holding Styles on his back and ramming him into the turnbuckles. Uh-oh, he rammed Styles into the ref. Jarrett goes for a superplex, but gets thrown off. AJ tries a springboard 450, but Jarrett gets the knees up. The crowd is on the edge of their seats. Vince Russo comes out with a guitar, fakes hitting Styles and than nails Jarrett. Styles hits the Styles Clash and gets the victory. Vince Russo comes in with the belt and acts like he won the belt. He's more excited than Styles. Good match, but all the outside interference just doesn't work for me, I'll give it a 2.9528429 out of 5.
Match 4: Don Harris vs. Malice, First Blood Match
I bet you didn't expect me to review this match, did ya? I bet most of you that watch wrestling either don't remember this match, or could never mentally conceive a match of such horror. Malice comes out with Father James Mitchell, while Don Harris is announced as TNA's Head of Security. A much better choice than Doug Dillinger, I must say. These two brawl all over the arena, hitting each other with chairs and ramming each other in guardrails all over the place. At one point, Harris hit Malice with a chair, and this one fan was just losing it over his excitment, just going crazy and acting like he was having convulsions or something. It was just a chair shot by Don freakin' Harris dude, calm down. Anyway, Mitchell comes out with the Arc of the Convenant, which is filled with the blood of an Asian cougar or something. Harris had the advantage for most of the match, until Malice's partner Slash comes in. He pulls out a shank, but Harris takes it away and jabs Slash with it instead. Mitchell interferes, but Harris boots him, spilling all of the cougar blood on Mitchell. Back in the ring, Harris hits Malice with a side slam, but all of a sudden starts bleeding. I don't know how it happened, but Malice wins. Harris gets beat down by Mitchell and his gang, and Mike Tenay is horrified by their actions. Since it was short, I'll give it a 1 out of 5.
Well, thanks for reading. If you have any ideas for future reviews or posts, or would like to contribute a review or post of your own, than e-mail me at KtheC2001@gmail.com. Reviews can be about pretty much anything, so let your imagination run wild, brother. I leave you with the gift of Jeff Hardy's TNA entrance theme. You will not like it.
However, since it's such a big day for TNA, I decided, what the heck, I'll watch a few TNA matches and do a review of them for this site. Hopefully there will be some good matches, and if they all suck, well, whatever doesn't kill me only makes be stronger. So win-win. Let's start the madness:
Match 1: Kurt Angle vs. Rhino, Final Resolution 2008 (Special Enforcer: Mick Foley)
They show a video package showing how the match was formed. See, Angle's group, the Main Event Mafia, put a beating on Rhino's friend Christian. Rhino wants revenge. Kurt Angle wants to wrestle Jeff Jarrett, but for some reason Jarrett won't wrestle him and Foley won't make the match. So the final result is Angle faces Rhino. If Angle wins, he gets to wrestle Jarrett at a later date. If Angle loses, he's fired. Well that hardly seems fair, now does it? Foley is here to make sure the Main Event Mafia doesn't interfere. So that's that. This match is rather boring, I must say. Angle hit a lot of different suplexes on Rhino that ultimately meant nothing. Angle put on his finisher, the Ankle Lock. Rhino lasted a full minute before countering out, which kind of killed off the move. Angle hit his other finisher, the Angle Slam, on Rhino, but Rhino kicked out at 2. So a mid-card wrestler can withstand both finishing moves of one of your top guys. That's smart. The best move of the match came when Rhino picked Angle up for a powerbomb, but instead of throwing him down, Rhino flipped him over his back so that Angle landed face-first on the top turnbuckle. Rhino went for his finisher, the Gore, about 6 times, but only hit it once, and that was on the referee. Once the ref goes down, Angle goes to get a chair, but is stopped by Foley. Rhino rolls up Angle for the 2 as Foley is now the official. Al Snow comes out for no particular reason, Mick Foley leans through the ropes to talk to him, but gets slapped by Al for his troubles. While Foley chases after Snow, Angle uses the chair on Rhino, than hits another Angle Slam. Foley gets back in and reluctantly delivers the three-count, giving Angle the victory and the opportunity to face Jeff Jarrett. Afterwards, Angle threatens his foes and drops an S-bomb. Good thing this is pay-per-view. Match wasn't terrible, but there was nothing that was too impressive, either. I give it a 2 out of 5.
Match 2: Jeff Hardy vs. Petey Williams, TNA Impact
Jeff Jarrett comes out with a ladder to do some commentary. Mike Tenay mentions that Jarrett and Hardy have an upcoming ladder match for the TNA Title, so that's why Jarrett has a ladder. Petey Williams comes out with Scott D'Amore. Jeff Hardy has a lame entrance song and seems to frothing at the mouth. But Jeff has to refused his rabies shot to get his hands on Petey. Match was about three minutes long, Hardy hit a couple of spots. Jarrett interferes, than AJ Styles interferes, doing his moonsault into reverse DDT maneuver on Petey Williams. Hardy gets the three count, and he and Styles head to the back triumphant. If these two were given 15 or 20 minutes, it could be a good match, or a huge trainwreck. As it is, it's just a match to set up future matches, nothing more. I'll say a 1.6830 out of 5, since everybody hit their moves.
Match 3: Raven vs. AJ Styles vs. Jeff Jarrett, NWA World Title Match
This match is for Jarrett's NWA Title. This match is from TNA's weekly pay-per-view era. There's also cagedancers, which is a little weird, but whatever. Jeff Jarrett has a bad titan tron, and an even worse shirt. If it were any tighter, Jeff Jarrett couldn't breathe. This is actually quite a good match, as everybody came in with their working boots on. Jarrett hit one of the best dropkicks I've ever seen on AJ early in the match. At first, everyone goes after everyone, but after Styles neutralizes Raven with a chair, Raven gets double teamed by his two opponents. That lasts until AJ guillotine leg drops Jarrett. Raven, now freed, becomes a House of Fire, battling his two opponents quite easily. He gives both men his trademark drop toe hold into a chair, and nearly gets the three on Styles before Jarrett breaks it up. After Styles gets knocked outside the ring, Raven gets Jarrett in the DDT position, wait Jarrett counters for a stroke, until Raven counters and hits the DDT on Jarrett. The referee goes to count, but Shane Douglas pulls Raven out of the ring to the shock of the announcers. He then beats Raven up and drags him out of the building, leaving us with Jeff and A.J. Styles nails Jarrett with the title belt, goes up top, and hits a D'Lo Brown style frog splash, Jarrett kicks out. Styles, charges, but Jarrett counters and throws Styles down HARD with an Alabama Slam type maneuver. Styles gets up, hist Jarrett with a sit out power bomb, but only gets two. Styles goes for the Styles clash, but Jarrett counters, holding Styles on his back and ramming him into the turnbuckles. Uh-oh, he rammed Styles into the ref. Jarrett goes for a superplex, but gets thrown off. AJ tries a springboard 450, but Jarrett gets the knees up. The crowd is on the edge of their seats. Vince Russo comes out with a guitar, fakes hitting Styles and than nails Jarrett. Styles hits the Styles Clash and gets the victory. Vince Russo comes in with the belt and acts like he won the belt. He's more excited than Styles. Good match, but all the outside interference just doesn't work for me, I'll give it a 2.9528429 out of 5.
Match 4: Don Harris vs. Malice, First Blood Match
I bet you didn't expect me to review this match, did ya? I bet most of you that watch wrestling either don't remember this match, or could never mentally conceive a match of such horror. Malice comes out with Father James Mitchell, while Don Harris is announced as TNA's Head of Security. A much better choice than Doug Dillinger, I must say. These two brawl all over the arena, hitting each other with chairs and ramming each other in guardrails all over the place. At one point, Harris hit Malice with a chair, and this one fan was just losing it over his excitment, just going crazy and acting like he was having convulsions or something. It was just a chair shot by Don freakin' Harris dude, calm down. Anyway, Mitchell comes out with the Arc of the Convenant, which is filled with the blood of an Asian cougar or something. Harris had the advantage for most of the match, until Malice's partner Slash comes in. He pulls out a shank, but Harris takes it away and jabs Slash with it instead. Mitchell interferes, but Harris boots him, spilling all of the cougar blood on Mitchell. Back in the ring, Harris hits Malice with a side slam, but all of a sudden starts bleeding. I don't know how it happened, but Malice wins. Harris gets beat down by Mitchell and his gang, and Mike Tenay is horrified by their actions. Since it was short, I'll give it a 1 out of 5.
Well, thanks for reading. If you have any ideas for future reviews or posts, or would like to contribute a review or post of your own, than e-mail me at KtheC2001@gmail.com. Reviews can be about pretty much anything, so let your imagination run wild, brother. I leave you with the gift of Jeff Hardy's TNA entrance theme. You will not like it.
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