This post comes thanks to one of the new features on blogspot, the stats menu. One of things that you can do with the stats feature is find out which search terms led a viewer to your blog. Well, according to the amount of people who have ended up here searching for the Wendy's Triple Baconator, I take it that a lot of people are hungry. Anyway, I saw that some reader ended up on the Canon Review because they searched for WCW Monday Nitro: April 17, 2000. So obviously, somebody wants more information about that particular show, so I figured, why not watch this here episode of Nitro and see how it is. Since it takes place during the Bischoff-Russo era, I have a strong feeling that it will suck, but I've been surprised before.
- It's the night after Spring Stampede 2000, and as such we get a minute and a half of still shots detailing last night's show. A lot of crap happened and Mancow wrestled Jimmy Hart, that's all I remember from that show. Your idiots in the booth tonight are Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson, and Mark Madden. A whole bunch of confetti and red balloons drop from the ceiling, and security guards are shown blocking the main entrance in order to block the Millionaire's Club from entering. Great, take the only people in the company that can draw off the show. Good strategy. Anyway, here comes Russo with his New Blood champions, Chris Candido (Cruiserweight Champion), Buff Bagwell, Shane Douglas (Tag Team Champs), and Scott Steiner (United States Champion). Russo gets on the mic, tells Jim Ross to kiss his ass, than introduces the new World Champion Jeff Jarrett, who also wishes for JR to smooch his backside. Jarrett expresses anger at not being asked to star in Ready To Rumble, which wouldn't make any sense since Jarrett was employed elsewhere at the time the movie was filming, than challenges Diamond Dallas Page to a Triple Cage Match straight out of the movie, which I'm sure everyone has seen at least 25 times, as it's just that great. Anyway, Eric Bischoff comes out with DDP's wife Kimberly, and the two go on to explain why Kimberly bashed her husband in the head with a guitar last night. Apparently, Kim is sick of being in DDP's shadow, and states that she's the real star of the Page family. Russo keeps talking while we cut to the parking lot, where DDP is calmly told that he's not allowed in the building tonight. DDP does not respond kindly to this, knocking out the unarmed security guards and heads to the ring. There's a riot squad around the ring, but they let DDP in without resistance. DDP gets a couple of shots in before the 5-on-1 advantage gets the best of him. Here comes the riot squad, and they start beating up the New Blood with nightsticks. They take off their helmets, and holy moly, it's Ric Flair, Sting, and Lex Luger of the Millionaire's Club! Who saw that coming? I think everyone did. Not the worst way to start, but it took a little too long to get going.
- To the back, where Bischoff chews out a group of New Blood wrestlers for not helping out earlier. Booker T takes exception, and the two exchange words before Booker and the rest leave in a huff. Hulk Hogan calls up Bischoff, and threatens him with a beating in five minutes. Shawn "The Perfect One" Stasiak and Curt Hennig wrestle each other in the first match of the evening. Ms. Hancock is out, for reasons unknown. Hennig hip tosses Stasiak a couple of times, but Stasiak uses punches and two body slams to take advantage. Hennig rolls out, Stasiak gets too close and Hennig pulls him out of the ring. Hennig chops Stasiak and bounces him against the guardrail and the announce table. Hennig sees Mark Madden, and does what any reasonable man would do and throws a cup of water in Madden's face. Unfortunately, the water does not short out Madden's mic, so I still have to hear him talk. Back in, Hennig Cartwheels out of an Irish whip! but Stasiak grounds Hennig with a clothesline. Stasiak uses a suplex to get a 2 count on Hennig, and goes to Irish whip Hennig, but that gets reversed and Stasiak ends up eating a kneelift for his troubles. Hennig with a running clothesline that catches both Stasiak and the referee. Perfectplex from Hennig, but there's no referee. While Hennig gets up to check on the ref, Stasiak digs out some brass knuckles out of his kneepad, and uses them to knock out Hennig. A Perfect Plant (kind of like an F-5, only Stasiak falls forward on his face instead of back) finishes Hennig off, and Stasiak gets the upset victory. Useless match that had no heat and did nothing for anybody. 1 out of 5.
- To the outside, where Hulk Hogan is surrounded by policemen blocking him from the building. Hogan gives the cops a Super Mega Stare, and the cops meekly back down for fear of suffering the wrath of Hulkamania. Apparently, Rockford, Illinois has the wimpiest police force in the United States. Hogan enters the building, seems to wander around as if he doesn't know where the entrance is, and the camera cuts to Stasiak stomping away on Hennig. Hogan, having found the correct way to go finally, comes out, saves Hennig from Stasiak's stomps and throws Stasiak out of the ring, and then we break for commercial.
- Back in the ring, Hogan has a microphone. He goes on about how he hasn't lost a step and is still the top dog and this and that, and challenges anyone in the back that wants to take his spot to come on down and get some. He then starts using his real name while running down Bischoff and Russo, so you know it's a SHOOT~! Hogan, or Terry Bollea as it were, claims that he has more heart than any other wrestler in the back. Well, that's sure to make him some friends. Hogan calls out Kidman, but Kidman shows up on the bigscreen and challenges Hogan to come back to the parking lot for a fight. Hogan rushes out, but he doesn't see Eric Bischoff and the notorious white Hummer. Uh oh.
- Mean Gene is with Jeff Jarrett, who has decided to put an open contract out, and the first New Blood member to sign it gets a shot at his World Title tonight. Hopefully it will be Shannon Moore. Jarrett then concludes the interview by calling Mean Gene a "Jurassic Slapass". Hey, that's my nickname! To the ring, where the Wall is going to wrestle Terry Funk for the WCW Hardcore Title. Yes, Bischoff and Russo's master plan to get the Hardcore Title is to send out The Wall. Funk slams a chair against the Wall's head to begin the match. Wall shrugs it off and throws Funk over the top rope out of the ring. Wall grabs the chair and heads to the outside, but takes a low blow. Funk uses the chair across the Wall's back, and climbs to the top rope. Moonsault press by Funk onto Wall, but that move didn't go quite as planned as Funk nearly lands on his on the outside. Ouch. Wall's up first and delivers a big boot to Funk. The two get on the announce table, and Wall piledrives Funk on the table, but it doesn't give at all and the two just fall off the table. Wall drags Funk around the outside, throwing him against one guardrail and slamming another guardrail against him. Further back, Wall finds a round cage, and uses it to slam the door on Funk's head a couple of times. Wall seems to be in control, until a bunch of tables mysteriously fall on Wall and knock him out. Funk puts a table on the Wall, double foot stomps through it, and gets the three count. A somewhat entertaining spectacle that was ruined by a crappy ending. I'll give it a 1.4 out of 5.
- To the back where Kronick demands a shot at the World Tag Team Titles tonight, but Russo denies them. Meanwhile, somebody signs Jarrett's contract, and when Jarrett sees who it is, he's not happy about it at all. Who is the mystery opponent? I bet it's The Artist Formerly Known as Prince Iaukea. Mean Gene is talking with DDP, who promises to gain revenge on Eric Bischoff for stealing his wife and will leave Mike Awesome laying tonight.
- Bob Probert's in the crowd tonight, watching the Mamalukes (Johnny the Bull and Big Vito) come out. In the back, Kronick is beating up the Harris Brothers, who were supposed to wrestle the Mamalukes but now they can't. What a shame, Kronick comes out instead and brawls with the Mamalukes. Full Nelson slam by Adams on Vito. Johnny the Bull does a flat-footed jump from the ring to the top rope, turns around and jumps back down, but eats a Bryan Clark chokeslam for his efforts. An F-5 from Adams onto Vito, and both Mamalukes end up taking Kronick's High Times finisher (double choke slam) before Adams gets the mic. He states that whoever faces them will end up in chronic pain and living a chronic nightmare, and Russo better give them a title shot or he'll find out what a chronic nightmare entails for himself.
- Vampiro comes out and grabs a mic. He says that Sting knows nothing about pain and that last night at Spring Stampede (where he came out from under the ring and dragged Sting down with him to presumably issue a beating) was only the beginning. At Slamboree, Vampiro promises to devour Sting. That starts Sting's music in the lights go out. The lights come back on just as Sting finishes his descent from the ceiling. Sting beats on Vampiro with his bat for a while, giving Vampiro a lesson in pain, as Sting put it. Sting finishes off with the Scorpion Death Drop to leave Vampiro laying in the middle of the ring. Sting proclaims WCW is his turf before leaving once again. Well, that made Vampiro look like a chump, building very little interest in their match at Slamboree since Sting just got his revenge right then.
- Hogan is still looking for Kidman, and asks some kids if they know where he is. Meanwhile, Jarrett moans and groans to Russo about his title match tonight against the mystery opponent. I bet it's Wade Barrett. DDP comes out as a fan holds up his book, Positively Page, which had recently come out around this time. His opponent is Mike Awesome, and the two waste no time as Page connects with a tornado clothesline and starts beating on Awesome in the corner. Irish Whip to the corner, but Awesome is able to springboard off the second turnbuckle with a back elbow, which almost gets a three count. A big splash from Awesome also gets 2. Irish Whip by Awesome, but Page is able to deliver a floatover DDT which also gets a two count. The two exchange clotheslines, and Page catches Awesome with a Uranage slam for a 2 count. Page eats a back elbow and goes to the outside, allowing Awesome to deliver a springboard lariat to the floor. Man, Awesome went a long way on that move. Awesome tries to give Page a standing splash against a guardrail, but Page moves and slams Awesome in the back with a chair. The announcers take this time to commentate about WCW's new lax disqualification rules. Back in. Page charges in with a chair, but Awesome slams his foot into the chair and into Page's face. A forearm to the chair in front of DDP's head sends Page to the outside. Chris Kanyon runs in, which gets a disqualifaction only half a minute after they talked about the new WCW's policy of letting fights go on. Kanyon takes a German suplex for his efforts, and Awesome goes to get a table. Kevin Nash's music hits, and Awesome waits for him to come to the ring. Instead Nash comes out of the crowd and attacks him from behind, before powerbombing Awesome through the table. Match was rushed, but if these two had 10 minutes they might of had a good match. Instead I'll give it a 1.5 out of 5.
- Tank Abbott is here, hopefully to beat up on Mark Madden again. Mean Gene is talking with the Tag Team champs, Shane Douglas and Buff Bagwell. What an odd combination. Bagwell and Douglas talk about their opponents at Slamboree, which are Lex Luger and Ric Flair, respectively. Douglas then calls Luger a jackass and challenges him to a match tonight, which Luger accepts, provided Vince Russo does not interfere. Tank Abbott is coming to the ring, and Mark Madden is throwing a fit for fear of taking another Tank beating. Abbott puts Madden in his place by yelling "Don't even look at me, fat ass". Ha, of all the wrestlers in the world, Tank Abbott is one of them. Tank goes on to explain that once again, until Goldberg comes back to face him, he will beat up another innocent person. This week's victim was to be part owner of the Chicago Blackhawks Bruce MacArthur, but before Tank could get started, Blackhawks' tough guy Bob Probert (perhaps the best fighter in NHL history) leaped over the rail and saved his boss. Security came out to break the two apart before anything could happen. Such a shame, because it would have been interesting to see those two go at it.
- Hogan asks Terry Taylor, who just arrived about 90 minutes into the show, where Kidman is. Taylor leads Hogan in Kidman's direction, and the fight may finally happen soon. Jarrett is informed by Russo that his mystery opponent still wants the match tonight, which greatly displeases Jarrett to the point where he calls Russo J.J. Dillion. Well, obviously that means that Jarrett's opponent will be Ole Anderson. Lex and Shane Douglas are out to have their match. Luger starts by punching Shane, and than spends the next minute or so using kicks, punches, and turnbuckle smashes all over Douglas, making the Franchise look like a jobber. Douglas finally gets a Russian legsweep and chokes Luger with a piece of tape. Irish Whip into the corner by Douglas, he charges, only to eat a boot to the face. Luger with a series of clotheslines, which brings out Buff, Buff comes out with his music and pyro going off during the middle of the match, distracting Luger and allowing Douglas to take advantage. Luger ducks a clotheslines and runs off the ropes, only for Bagwell to grab his foot. Luger drags Bagwell to the apron, but a low blow sends Luger down. While Bagwell preoccupies himself with Luger's manager Miss Elizabeth, Douglas whips Luger into the guardrail, near a fan with a Sting mask. The fan attacks Douglas with a bat, and reveals himself to be Ric Flair. The two go to beat on Shane inside the ring, and the ref calls for the bell. Russo comes out to drag off Douglas, and the three go to the back arguing about something. You know, for a show that is promising the promotion of the young guys, the young guys are sure taking a butt-whooping on this show. This was no different. I'll give it a 0.6 out of 5 and hopefully I'll forget that I ever watched this match.
- Hogan has finally found Kidman, after 1 hour of looking for him. He starts kicking Kidman's butt before Torrie hits him with a 2 x 4. That doesn't faze Hogan, so he grabs Torrie by the throat and backs her up against a post before Kidman makes the save. Kidman gets two punches on Hogan before Hogan just annihilates Kidman, throwing him against the wall and a plastic cart a few times before yelling that he will kill Kidman. Bischoff is seen hiding in the corner while Hogan picks up Kidman and throws him into a dumpster. Hogan sees Bischoff and goes after him. Bischoff goes in the Hummer, but it won't start, so he takes off up the ramp and out of the parking garage. Hogan decides to get in the Hummer and remarkably, it starts right back up. The hell? He then proceeds to ram the dumpster containing Kidman with the Hummer three times, which is probably illegal in most states. Hogan takes off in the Hummer up the ramp, presumably to commit vehicular homicide on Eric Bischoff. God, this is stupid. Kidman is then rescued from the dumpster and put on a stretcher by medical personnel.
- Jarrett comes out to wrestle the mystery opponent. That man could be none other than Josh Hamilton. Oh wait, it's Scott Steiner, accompanied to the ring by three of his 'freaks', I suppose. The match starts, and Steiner goes to work on Jarrett in the corner. A clothesline and elbow drop follows by Big Poppa Pump, and Steiner then slams Jarrett with a gorilla press drop. After Steiner whips Jarrett into the corner, Jarrett gets the boots up into a charging Steiner, and starts stomping away at his opponent. Cross body block from the top by Jarrett, that gets a two count. He follows up with a dropkick, but Steiner reverses an Irish Whip and then catches Jarrett on his shoulder as Jarrett leaps in an attempt to dodge Steiner. Slam into the corner by Steiner, followed by a choke while Jarrett's in the Tree of Woe. Belly-to-Belly gets two for Steiner, and after the two exchange low blows, Steiner gets the advantage and puts Jarrett in the Steiner Recliner. Out comes Booker T, who scissor kicks Steiner, drawing the DQ and saving Jarrett's title in the process. Booker grabs Jarrett and says, "you're welcome, punk". That makes for the third DQ of the night, when the announcers had been talking all night about how WCW is going to let their wrestlers fight. Match wasn't long enough to mean anything and wasn't all that good anyways. I'll give it a 1.2 out of 5.
- Hogan's in the back with a pipe, he finally finds Bischoff, and Bischoff takes off running all the way to the ring, Hogan backs up Bischoff in the corner and starts threatening him, when Bret Hart comes out with a chair. Hart swings the chair, but the show goes off the air before we see who he blasts with the chair. Hopefully it's both of them.
This show was 31 flavors of suck. The matches didn't go very long, the interviews tended to drag, and their was way too much Hogan walking around cursing backstage. Plus the show did nothing for the New Blood except make them look like chumps, especially Kidman and Vampiro. This was just one bad wrestling show. I'll give it a 1.8 out of 10, and I recommend nobody go back and watch this tripe. Well, thanks for reading, and if you have any ideas for blog posts or reviews, or thoughts about this post, let me know about them either by e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com or by leaving a comment.
Kidman & Hulk Hogan Brawl 17.4.00
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Showing posts with label Buff Bagwell. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Buff Bagwell. Show all posts
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Canon Wrestling Review: WCW Fall Brawl 1997
I should have done this yesterday, but I'm too lazy, and Hell's Kitchen was on, and other stuff, so I apologize for not updating The Canon Review yesterday. Anyway, the reason this review came about is that one of my friends said the other day that they attended this show, and Canon Review reader Ben W., who was also there at the time, suggested I go back and watch this show. Well, that's good enough for me, so let's start this show. Fall Brawl 1997 took place in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, and is probably most known for the War Games main event, which takes place in two rings surrounded by a cage, between the Four Horsemen and the new World order, where somebody gets a door slammed on their face. Who is it? Well, read on to find out.
The three idiots at the broadcast position tonight are Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, and Bobby Heenan. Bobby has decided to wear a red sports jacket with a matching bow tie for reasons unknown. Up first is Eddy Guerrero wrestling Chris Jericho for Jericho's WCW Cruiserweight Title. Guerrero comes out, and the on-screen text introduces him as Harlem Heat. Last I checked, Guerrero was not two people, or black. No wonder this company went out of buisness. I half expected Jericho to be introduced as The Public Enemy, but at least they got his name right. Mike Tenay announces that Jericho is taking a tour of Japan after this match, which kind of gives away the winner of the match. We start off with an exchange of holds and chops, with neither man getting the advantage. Jericho seems to be concentrating on Guerrero's left arm, using a series of arm drags and arm bars to neutralize his opponent. The crowd chants something during the middle of the match, I tried three times to hear what it was, but I couldn't quite decipher it. A hotshot by Jericho leads into the Lionsault, and that gets a two count. Jericho remains in control, but Eddie counters a standing armbar with a jawjacker using the top rope. As Eddy stomps away at Jericho, he gets an "Eddy Sucks" chant. Surfboard by Eddy, he lets Jericho out, only to back suplex him down and put him in the Surfboard hold again. Jericho is really selling the move, as Heenan points out that it looks like Jericho has a "bitter beer face" Jericho gets out, but Eddy beats him down. Eddy does his trademark slingshot senton, which gets a two count. Undaunted, Eddy puts Jericho in his father's old finisher, the Gory Special. Heenan and Tony claim to have never seen the move while Tenay does a good job explaining the significance of Eddy using that hold. Of the three, Tenay was probably the least annoying commentator at this time, of course he's just awful in TNA now, but still.
Jericho counters the Gory Special with one of his own, than throws Eddy down off of his shoulders. Brawling ensues, Eddy gets Jericho in the corner and starts walking the ropes, but Jericho crotches him on the top rope, and pulls up and down on the rope to increase Guerrero's agony. Jericho has Guerrero in a powerbomb position on the apron, and decides to throw Eddy over his shoulders throat first on the top rope. However, Eddy comes staggering down on the outside and runs into Jericho, bumping him into the steel guardrail, so both men are down. Back in, Jericho hits a huge German Suplex, launching Guerrero high in the air. Cover, but Eddy gets his foot on the bottom rope. Jericho goes for another powerbomb, but Eddy escapes, and then catches Jericho with a Uranage suplex, slamming Jericho hard to the mat. Guerrero charges from the corner, but Jericho hits a quick powerslam, which nearly gets a three count. Jericho gets another two count with a spinning wheel kick, and follows that with a pancake manuever. Magistral attempted by Jericho but countered sloppily by Guerrero, that gets a two count. Jericho gets Eddy in the powerbomb position, and powerbombs him twice, holding on after each one. Instead of attempting a third powerbomb, Jericho puts Eddy on the top turnbuckle and attempts a superplex, but Eddy shifts his weight and lands on top of Jericho. With his opponent down, Eddy climbs the turnbuckle, and hits his finisher, the Frog Splash, which gives Eddy the three count and the victory. Match started out kind of slow, but the two really worked hard and had the crowd into the match. Most of the moves executed were done perfectly and the last five to eight minutes or so were just brilliant. Overall, I'll give the match a 3.8 out of 5.
Larry Zbyszko has joined the commentary team, which can not be a good thing. Over at the WCW.com table, the webmaster is conducting a live chat with Jeff Jarrett, who is wrestling Dean Malenko later tonight. Up next is Harlem Heat (w/ Jacquelyn) vs. The Steiner Brothers (w/ Ted DiBiase) in the 830th match these two teams have had. The Heat comes out, which makes these two white guys so happy they high-five each other and start raising the roof. Apparently, the teams felt the presence of Zbyszko, so they decided to pay tribute to him by stalling for five minutes before starting the match. Scott Steiner and Stevie Ray start off with some brawling tactics. Stevie catches Scott with a boot out of the corner, and than whips Scott off the rope and side slams him down. Stevie puts Scott in the corner, but eats a boot of his own, and takes a belly-to-belly suplex. Stevie decides to leave and stall some more before Booker T gets tagged in. Full Nelson on Scott, and Booker lets him out to vertical suplex Scott down. Booker goes to the top, but gets caught by Scott and takes an overhead belly-to-belly. Gorilla Press by Scott on Booker, and Rick Steiner intercepts an oncoming Stevie Ray with a Steinerline. Harlem Heat recovers on the outside while Rick decides now would be a good time to chew on the bottom rope.
We finally get back to action, and Rick gets a two count on Booker after a body slam and elbow drop. The third boot to the face out of the corner in this match is used by Booker, who follows up with a spin kick. Brawling tactics by the Heat ensue, but Rick counters an attempted leapfrog by Booker by catching him and slamming him down. Tag to Scott, he starts to attack Booker, but a distraction by Stevie Ray allows Booker T to thrust kick Scott and sends him to the outside, where Stevie goes to beat up on him. Scott gets back in and whipped off the ropes by Booker, who decks Scott with a flying forearm. Booker goes for a spin kick, but Scott takes a step back and catches Booker, delivering a back suplex. HOT TAG to Rick, who cleans house and hits the top-rope bulldog on Stevie, but Booker breaks it up. Stevie gets back up, hoists Rick on his shoulders while Booker scales the top turnbuckle. Booker missle dropkicks Rick off of Stevie's shoulders in a move Heenan calls the Heatseeker, but Rick gets out at two. Booker gets sent to the outside, Scott catches Stevie Ray from behind and the two Stiener give Stevie a combination Steinerline-German Suplex manuever, and the match abruptly ends after that move gets the three count. The match had a few good moments, but they were too few and far in between. I'll give it a 1.94 out of 5.
Ultimo Dragon comes out to wrestle Television Champion Alex Wright. Mike Tenay is back, so now we have four men doing the job that two can do. Some people in the crowd dance, but most accuse Wright of choosing to live an alternative lifestyle by way of chant. Wright starts off by dancing a lot, so Ultimo gives him a dropkick and Wright bails to the outside to catch his breath. Some holds and counterholds are exchanged by the two men, until Dragon gets control by giving the champ a series of kicks. Wright gets back control with the stun gun (the former finisher of Steve Austin, not a taser). Wright gets a series of two counts after a jumping side kick and a back suplex, and in between those manuever he puts the Dragon in a series of chinlocks. Dragon reverses an Irish whip and cross body blocks Wright, than delivers a series of stiff kicks to his opponent's back. Dragon tries a spinning wheel kick, but Wright holds on to the rope, and goes on the attack with another chinlock. Wright gets up, knees Dragon in the stomach, than uses yet another chinlock. These chinlocks may not be putting Ultimo Dragon to sleep, but it's putting me to sleep. Back up, Dragon is sent into the ropes and attempts a Sunset Flip on Wright, but Alex punches him down and then rather unwisely decides to dance, giving Dragon the opportunity to roll Wright up and get a two count. Both men climb to the top, Wright is thrown down, but has the presence of mind to get the feet up when Dragon dives off the top rope, sending Ultimo to the mat. Wright uses a back heel kick and a snap suplex to floor his opponent, than goes up to the top, only for Dragon to counter his dive by getting the feet up. Dragon goes on the offensive with a series of kicks that send Wright to the outside, following up with his trademark Asai Moonsault which nearly takes the cameraman down along with Wright.
Back in, Dragon with a huracanrana, than both wrestlers just lie on the ground for a few seconds before exchanging knife-edge chops from their knees. Dragon gets the advantage after a short dropkick. Dragon goes up top, but Wright crotches him on the turnbuckle, than dropkicks Dragon to the outside of the ring. Wright with a suicide dive, which the announcers are quite surprised at considering Wright usually doesn't do those types of maneuvers. Back in, the two jockey for position, but Ultimo gets the advantage, and does a release Tiger Suplex on Wright which draws a two count. Dragon follows up with a Dragon Suplex with a bridge, but that also only gets two. Dragon picks Wright up and sets him on the top turnbuckle. The two fight on the top before Dragon flips over Wright's back, lands on his feet and powerbombs his opponent. Wright once again kicks out. Dragon is undaunted, and slams Wright down to set up for a moonsault, which connects and draws yet another two count. Dragon tries for another Huracanrana, but Wright rolls through and puts Dragon on his back for a two count. Wright is down, and Dragon tries a top rope attack, but Wright gets up in time and catches Dragon mid-air with a dropkick for another near-fall. Both men perform a series of roll-ups for three more two counts, and Dragon dropkicks Wright into the corner and hoists him on the turnbuckle. Dragon then does a turnaround huracanrana on Wright off the top and follows with his finisher, the Dragon Sleeper, but Wright is able to get to the ropes. Dragon once again tries for the Dragon Sleeper, but Wright counters with a jawbreaker, and then uses his finisher, the German Suplex, to finally defeat the Ultimo Dragon and retain his TV Title. Good match that really didn't get going until it was about 12 minutes in, and had some awkward moments. Nevertheless, I'll give it a 3.05 out of 5.
Mean Gene Okerlund is shown in the back shilling the WCW hotline when the nWo comes running by. Gene goes to see what's going on, and finds one of the 4 Horsemen, Curt Hennig, lying on the floor. Will Hennig be ok for the main event? Time will tell. In the meantime we have a number one contenders match for Steve McMichael's United States Title pitting Jeff Jarrett against Dean Malenko. Mike Tenay has left again, so we're back to three announcers. The action has moved from the first ring to the second ring for this match for some reason. Jarrett sends his manager, Debra McMichael, to the back so there won't be any distractions in the match. Match starts, Jarrett uses a hip toss and then does his trademark strut. Back to action, the two exchange before Jarrett gets sent down hard with a Malenko shoulder block. The two exchange some basic wrestling maneuvers before Malenko takes advantage with some punches. Back down to the mat, Malenko gets the advantage with a dropkick, and Jarrett goes to the outside to catch his breath. Back in, Jarrett gets the advantage with a side headlock, but Malenko is able to whip Jarrett off the ropes and starts peppering him with punches before Jarrett ducks and uses a sleeper hold. Malenko gets to the ropes. Jarrett goes for a vertical suplex on Malenko, but Malenko blocks, lifts Jarrett up and sets him on the top turnbuckle, than Superplexes Jarrett down. Both men are down but get up at the same time. Malneko is back on the attack with a dropkick and a German Suplex, than puts Jarrett in his submission finisher, the Texas Cloverleaf. Jarrett gets to the ropes, but Debra comes back from the, well, back.
Malenko clotheslines Jarrett so hard that both men go flying over the top rope. While Jarrett is talking with Debra, Malenko uses the time to come back in the ring and uses the baseball slide kick to send Jarrett into the guardrail. Malenko starts to go to work on Jarrett near the guardrails before the two go back in, where Malenko gets a two count after a dropkick. The announcers, particularly Zybzsko, are grilling Malenko due to his lack of emotion in the ring, saying it makes him a worse wrestler or something, I don't know. Malenko whips Jarrett into a corner and charges, but Jarrett catches him with a back elbow and all of a sudden starts to work over Malenko's legs to set him up for the Figure-Four. While Jarrett is pulling on Malenko's leg from outside the ring, Malenko kicks him off, than as Jarrett gets on the apron, Malenko sets him up for a suplex. But Jarrett counters with a cross-body, and gets a two count. Malenko with a sleeperhold, but Jarrett gets out and than back suplexes Malenko down near the corner. Jarrett climbs the ropes and dives, but Malenko gets a leg up. However, Jarrett catches the leg and goes for the Figure-Four, and Malenko counters with an inside cradle to get two. A series of holds get two counts for each men, and as the two are countering each other's moves, Malenko does a leapfrog but lands awkwardly on his ankle. Jarrett attacks by clipping the leg and slapping the Figure-Four on Malenko, who has no choice but to give up. Jarrett now gets a U.S. Title shot at Halloween Havoc. However, he left WCW a few weeks later and was in the WWF by the time Halloween Havoc aired. Regardless, this was another good match. I'll say it's a 2.8 out of 5.
The nWo War Games team of Buff Bagwell, Konnan, Syxx, and Kevin Nash do a promo concerning tonight's main event. They promise to put an end to the Four Horsemen tonight, Zbyszko proclaims that the nWo makes him sick. Up next is a tag team match between the Faces of Fear (Meng and Barbarian) and the team of Wrath and Mortis. Why they decided to match up two heel tag teams together is anybody's guess. The Faces of Fear have matching red pants on tonight, a change up from their normal black pants. This is just a brawl early on, as the two teams just beat on each other and use clotheslines and body slams to beat each other down. Mortis comes in, gets backdropped by Meng into Barbarian, who catches and then powerbombs him. Wrath breaks up the count. Barbarian and Meng continue to dominate Mortis until Barbarian gets on the top rope, only for Wrath and Mortis' manager, James Vandenberg, to shake the top rope and crotching Barbarian in the process. While Meng chases Vandenberg, Barbarian recovers and dives off the top, only to be countered with a raised boot from Mortis. Wrath comes in with a pump kick, and the two nearly pin Barbarian after a powerbomb-neckbreaker combo move before Meng breaks up the count.
Wrath is tagged in and uses more punches and kicks to stifle his foe the Barbarian, then uses a backbreaker and an elbow drop to down Barbarian. Cover, but Barbarian gets his foot on the rope. Mortis is tagged in, and uses a variation of the Rocker Dropper where he comes in and drives a fully standing Barbarian down to the mat with his leg hooked around Barbarian's neck. That gets two. Wrath is tagged back in, and uses a top rope clothesline to send Barbarian to the outside, where Mortis dumps some stairs on him while he is down. Back in the ring. Barbarian is set up on the top rope. Meanwhile, Mortis is sitting on Wrath's shoulders, and they perform an Ultra Superplex on Barbarian, which really pops the crowd and the announcers. But Mortis is still down, and that allows Barbarian to get the Hot Tag to Meng, which gets the loudest reaction of the night up to this point. Meng is just clobbering people left and right, superkicking Mortis and pounding away on Wrath. Powerslam on Wrath gets a two before Mortis breaks it up.Mortis is in but gets slammed down by Meng, who climbs the top rope and delivers a picture perfect splash on Mortis. Wrath comes in to break up the count. Barbarian comes in but is disposed of by Wrath. Meanwhile, Vandenberg is on the apron but gets caught in the Tongan Death Grip by Meng. Mortis tries to break it up, but gets a Tongan Death Grip of his own. Wrath comes back in from behind, and delivers a Death Penalty (Rock Bottom) to Meng, which gets the victory for Wrath and Mortis. There wasn't a lot of finesse in this match, just a lot of hard-hitting action. Still, it was quite entertaining, so I'll give it a 3.139 out of 5.
Mean Gene is in the back with an interview with three of the Horsemen, Benoit and McMichael say a bunch of boring stuff before Flair fires up the crowd with his interview. Basically, the point was that they will go on without Hennig, making it a 4 vs. 3 match. Scott Norton comes out for his match against The Giant. The two waste no time as they exchange blows before heading outside the ring to continue battle. Giant picks Norton up on his shoulder, but Norton slips out and throws him into the ring post. Norton tries to suplex the Giant, but takes a suplex of his own instead. Norton gets in the ring first, and clotheslines the Giant back out just as he was stepping into the ring. Back in, the two exchange blows, but Norton goes downstairs, than catches Giant with a Stun Gun. Norton gets Giant in a corner and delivers some heavy blows to him. Finally, Norton gets Giant out of the corner and back suplexes him, but that gets two. Norton argues with the ref, but the Giant grabs a rope and then kips up. Not bad for a 7 foot 450 pound man. Giant with a big boot and a dropkick sends Norton down, and he calls for the Choke Slam. Giant grabs Norton by the throat, lifts him up, and slams him down, getting a three count. Short match which wasn't too bad, but not that good either. I'll give it a 1.5 out of 5. During the replay, Heenan calls Scott Norton Ed Norton. I don't know if he made a mistake or was just referencing the old Honeymooners character, but that's what he called him.
Next is a rematch from last month's Clash of the Champions featuring the nWo team of Randy Savage and Scott Hall against WCW's Diamond Dallas Page and Lex Luger, who have had some issues over the past few weeks. Schiavone makes the claim that Luger has the most recognizable upper body in sports. Um, OK. A test of strength between Hall and Luger starts off the match, and Hall loses. Zbyszko states that Hall is one of the most overrated wrestlers in the business, pulling no punches for their ongoing feud. Luger starts delivering clothesline to both Hall and Savage, and while Hall escapes to the outside, Luger Gorilla Press slams Savage over the top rope onto Hall. Tag into DDP, and he and Hall start going at it. Page gets the advantage with a series of punches and an atomic drop, all of which Hall oversells to comedic proportions. Page with a pancake piledriver on Hall and decks Savage off of the apron. That proves to be a bad idea, as Savage gets angry and trips DDP coming off the rope.
The nWo start double teaming Page, and Hall nearly gets a three count after a powerslam. Savage and Hall have Page trapped in the corner, but DDP escapes only for Savage to catch up and hold him from tagging out to Luger. Hall uses this opportunity to take advantage by slugging Luger on the apron and stomping him down in between the two rings, leaving Luger stuck there. While Luger's stuck, Savage and Hall take turns throwing Page from one ring to another, and while Savage is choking Page with a ring rope, Hall decides to deck the referee for no good reason. Another ref comes out, only to meet the same result. That brings out an enraged Zbyszko, who gets on the ring apron to jaw with Hall. Meanwhile Luger is finally getting up, and after Zbyszko shoves Hall, Luger rolls him up from behind and Zbyszko administers the three count, which is apparently good enough to make this a victory for Luger and Page. Schiavone claims that that moment where Zbyszko counted Hall down is a moment we will never forget. Well until five minutes ago, I had completly forgotten about it. This match was little more than a setup for a future angle, and nobody brought their A game, per se. I'll give it a 1.1 out of 5 and hope to never have to see it again.
Before the main event, Gene shills the Hotline once more. Michael Buffer is out, doing his thing. He comes up with a great line in introducing the match, which goes as follows: "Two teams, one cage. (long dramatic pause), It's time to set the stage, for the rage, of the WAR GAMES~!" Well, I liked it. The rules of War Games are this, there are two teams of four, the match starts with a five minute period of one on one action, there's a coin flip, and whoever wins gets to send their next man in, the losing them sends the next man in after two minutes, and after every two minutes, the teams alternate putting people in the match until everybody is in. At which time, the match can only end by submission or surrender. The two teams are matched up mainly due to a parody that the nWo did of former horseman Arn Anderson's retirement speech, which you can see right after I'm done writing. The cage is lowered, and the nWo team is out first. According to Buffer, this unit of the nWo want to be called the "Now Ready for Prime Time Players". I'm thinking Nash came up with that one. Anyway, Kevin Nash, Buff Bagwell, Syxx and Konnan represent the nWo. The Horsemen team come out, but Curt Hennig is conspicuous by his absence, so Ric Flair, Chris Benoit, and Steve "Mongo" McMichael have to go without him. Bagwell and Benoit will start this match. Benoit dominates early and bounces Bagwell against the cage a couple of times before missing a swan dive headbutt off the top rope. Buff takes this opportunity to mug for the camera and throws Benoit against the cage. Both men get up, Benoit charges at Buff but gets backdropped into the cage wall, nearly landing head first on the mat. Buff stomps on Benoit some. The nWo wins the cointoss, but Benoit is starting to regain control of the match. Konnan comes in and tries to dive onto Benoit, but gets kicked on the way down. Benoit with a snap suplex on Konnan and a bodyslam on Bagwell. Once both men are up, Benoit sends them flying into the cage. The numbers prove to be too much, as Bagwell catches Benoit with a kick to the gut and Konnan DDTs him down to the mat. Bagwell takes this time to again mug for the camera.
The three men take the fight to the other ring but never mind that shit, HERE COMES MONGO! He makes his presence felt by delivering clotheslines and bodyslams to both of his opponents. Three point stance into football tackle by Mongo onto Konnan. YEAH! The two Horsemen are in control but here comes Syxx. But Benoit sees him coming and catches him with a brutal clothesline. The Horsemen continue to take the fight to the opponent, and Mongo picks Syxx up and slams him against the roof of the cage. Benoit with the Crippler Crossface on Syxx, and Bagwell breaks it up quickly, much to my delight. I'm not going to get into why that delighted me, but if you know much about Chris Benoit than you might know why. Benoit gets up and throws Syxx into the cage, but that is ignored by the announcers because Curt Hennig has come from the back with his arm in a sling. Flair enters the ring with knife-edge chops for everyone. The Horsemen spend the next two minutes dominating the nWo until Kevin Nash comes in. Nash goes after Flair, whips him into the ropes and sidewalk slams him down. Benoit comes over, but Nash picks him up and slams him back first against the cage. While Mongo is still fighting Konnan, Nash catches him with a big boot and all three Horsemen are down. Buff once again takes this time to mug for the camera. You know, Bagwell knew where the cameras were more than any other wrestler I've ever seen. In a way I almost admire that, but at the same time it gets annoying rather quickly. Syxx is rubbing Flair's face into the cage, but the camera focuses on Hennig. There's some brawling going on between the two teams, and Flair has Syxx in the Figure Four when Hennig comes in. He takes off the sling to reveal two pairs of handcuffs, much to the delight of the crowd. The crowd turns on Hennig about ten seconds later when he hits his teammates Mongo and Benoit with the cuffs and goes right after Flair. Benoit and Mongo are being handcuffed to the cage while the rest of the nWo take turns stomping on Flair. Nash gets a mic and asks if Benoit and Mongo want to surrender, but they refuse. Flair continues to take a beating while Bagwell takes the mic and asks Benoit if he wants to quit, and gets spit on for his efforts. Jacknife powerbomb by Nash onto Flair, and Mongo and Benoit both continue refusing surrender. Finally, Hennig drags Flair and positions his head near the cage door, and Nash threatens that unless the Horsemen quit, Hennig is going to slam the door into Flair's head. Mongo surrenders, but Hennig's such an evil guy that he slams the door in Flair's face anyway. To be honest, it didn't look quite as bad as the announcers were making it out to be, but it still looked painful enough. The nWo wins, Nash proclaims that the Horsemen are dead and Schiavone calls this the most sickening night of his life. Flair would come back a month later and feud with Hennig, so I guess it wasn't that bad. The match was decent enough but the ending kind of sucked the life out of the crowd and really made the Horsemen look like idiots. Plus, even at the time, you could see Hennig's turn coming a mile away. I'll give it a 2.40 out of 5.
Overall, despite the down note it ended it, WCW Fall Brawl 1997 wasn't a bad pay-per-view. Three were three rather good matches and two others that were decent as well. The worst match was the nWo-Page and Luger match, but even that served its purpose. I'll give the show en masse a 6.5 out of 10, as it was three hours of good wrestling action. Well, thanks for reading this monstrosity of a post, and if you have any thoughts about Fall Brawl 97, feel free to leave a comment. Also, if you have ideas for future reviews, than send them me via e-mail at kthec2001@gmail.com. I leave you with the nWo mocking the Horsemen on Nitro:
The three idiots at the broadcast position tonight are Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, and Bobby Heenan. Bobby has decided to wear a red sports jacket with a matching bow tie for reasons unknown. Up first is Eddy Guerrero wrestling Chris Jericho for Jericho's WCW Cruiserweight Title. Guerrero comes out, and the on-screen text introduces him as Harlem Heat. Last I checked, Guerrero was not two people, or black. No wonder this company went out of buisness. I half expected Jericho to be introduced as The Public Enemy, but at least they got his name right. Mike Tenay announces that Jericho is taking a tour of Japan after this match, which kind of gives away the winner of the match. We start off with an exchange of holds and chops, with neither man getting the advantage. Jericho seems to be concentrating on Guerrero's left arm, using a series of arm drags and arm bars to neutralize his opponent. The crowd chants something during the middle of the match, I tried three times to hear what it was, but I couldn't quite decipher it. A hotshot by Jericho leads into the Lionsault, and that gets a two count. Jericho remains in control, but Eddie counters a standing armbar with a jawjacker using the top rope. As Eddy stomps away at Jericho, he gets an "Eddy Sucks" chant. Surfboard by Eddy, he lets Jericho out, only to back suplex him down and put him in the Surfboard hold again. Jericho is really selling the move, as Heenan points out that it looks like Jericho has a "bitter beer face" Jericho gets out, but Eddy beats him down. Eddy does his trademark slingshot senton, which gets a two count. Undaunted, Eddy puts Jericho in his father's old finisher, the Gory Special. Heenan and Tony claim to have never seen the move while Tenay does a good job explaining the significance of Eddy using that hold. Of the three, Tenay was probably the least annoying commentator at this time, of course he's just awful in TNA now, but still.
Jericho counters the Gory Special with one of his own, than throws Eddy down off of his shoulders. Brawling ensues, Eddy gets Jericho in the corner and starts walking the ropes, but Jericho crotches him on the top rope, and pulls up and down on the rope to increase Guerrero's agony. Jericho has Guerrero in a powerbomb position on the apron, and decides to throw Eddy over his shoulders throat first on the top rope. However, Eddy comes staggering down on the outside and runs into Jericho, bumping him into the steel guardrail, so both men are down. Back in, Jericho hits a huge German Suplex, launching Guerrero high in the air. Cover, but Eddy gets his foot on the bottom rope. Jericho goes for another powerbomb, but Eddy escapes, and then catches Jericho with a Uranage suplex, slamming Jericho hard to the mat. Guerrero charges from the corner, but Jericho hits a quick powerslam, which nearly gets a three count. Jericho gets another two count with a spinning wheel kick, and follows that with a pancake manuever. Magistral attempted by Jericho but countered sloppily by Guerrero, that gets a two count. Jericho gets Eddy in the powerbomb position, and powerbombs him twice, holding on after each one. Instead of attempting a third powerbomb, Jericho puts Eddy on the top turnbuckle and attempts a superplex, but Eddy shifts his weight and lands on top of Jericho. With his opponent down, Eddy climbs the turnbuckle, and hits his finisher, the Frog Splash, which gives Eddy the three count and the victory. Match started out kind of slow, but the two really worked hard and had the crowd into the match. Most of the moves executed were done perfectly and the last five to eight minutes or so were just brilliant. Overall, I'll give the match a 3.8 out of 5.
Larry Zbyszko has joined the commentary team, which can not be a good thing. Over at the WCW.com table, the webmaster is conducting a live chat with Jeff Jarrett, who is wrestling Dean Malenko later tonight. Up next is Harlem Heat (w/ Jacquelyn) vs. The Steiner Brothers (w/ Ted DiBiase) in the 830th match these two teams have had. The Heat comes out, which makes these two white guys so happy they high-five each other and start raising the roof. Apparently, the teams felt the presence of Zbyszko, so they decided to pay tribute to him by stalling for five minutes before starting the match. Scott Steiner and Stevie Ray start off with some brawling tactics. Stevie catches Scott with a boot out of the corner, and than whips Scott off the rope and side slams him down. Stevie puts Scott in the corner, but eats a boot of his own, and takes a belly-to-belly suplex. Stevie decides to leave and stall some more before Booker T gets tagged in. Full Nelson on Scott, and Booker lets him out to vertical suplex Scott down. Booker goes to the top, but gets caught by Scott and takes an overhead belly-to-belly. Gorilla Press by Scott on Booker, and Rick Steiner intercepts an oncoming Stevie Ray with a Steinerline. Harlem Heat recovers on the outside while Rick decides now would be a good time to chew on the bottom rope.
We finally get back to action, and Rick gets a two count on Booker after a body slam and elbow drop. The third boot to the face out of the corner in this match is used by Booker, who follows up with a spin kick. Brawling tactics by the Heat ensue, but Rick counters an attempted leapfrog by Booker by catching him and slamming him down. Tag to Scott, he starts to attack Booker, but a distraction by Stevie Ray allows Booker T to thrust kick Scott and sends him to the outside, where Stevie goes to beat up on him. Scott gets back in and whipped off the ropes by Booker, who decks Scott with a flying forearm. Booker goes for a spin kick, but Scott takes a step back and catches Booker, delivering a back suplex. HOT TAG to Rick, who cleans house and hits the top-rope bulldog on Stevie, but Booker breaks it up. Stevie gets back up, hoists Rick on his shoulders while Booker scales the top turnbuckle. Booker missle dropkicks Rick off of Stevie's shoulders in a move Heenan calls the Heatseeker, but Rick gets out at two. Booker gets sent to the outside, Scott catches Stevie Ray from behind and the two Stiener give Stevie a combination Steinerline-German Suplex manuever, and the match abruptly ends after that move gets the three count. The match had a few good moments, but they were too few and far in between. I'll give it a 1.94 out of 5.
Ultimo Dragon comes out to wrestle Television Champion Alex Wright. Mike Tenay is back, so now we have four men doing the job that two can do. Some people in the crowd dance, but most accuse Wright of choosing to live an alternative lifestyle by way of chant. Wright starts off by dancing a lot, so Ultimo gives him a dropkick and Wright bails to the outside to catch his breath. Some holds and counterholds are exchanged by the two men, until Dragon gets control by giving the champ a series of kicks. Wright gets back control with the stun gun (the former finisher of Steve Austin, not a taser). Wright gets a series of two counts after a jumping side kick and a back suplex, and in between those manuever he puts the Dragon in a series of chinlocks. Dragon reverses an Irish whip and cross body blocks Wright, than delivers a series of stiff kicks to his opponent's back. Dragon tries a spinning wheel kick, but Wright holds on to the rope, and goes on the attack with another chinlock. Wright gets up, knees Dragon in the stomach, than uses yet another chinlock. These chinlocks may not be putting Ultimo Dragon to sleep, but it's putting me to sleep. Back up, Dragon is sent into the ropes and attempts a Sunset Flip on Wright, but Alex punches him down and then rather unwisely decides to dance, giving Dragon the opportunity to roll Wright up and get a two count. Both men climb to the top, Wright is thrown down, but has the presence of mind to get the feet up when Dragon dives off the top rope, sending Ultimo to the mat. Wright uses a back heel kick and a snap suplex to floor his opponent, than goes up to the top, only for Dragon to counter his dive by getting the feet up. Dragon goes on the offensive with a series of kicks that send Wright to the outside, following up with his trademark Asai Moonsault which nearly takes the cameraman down along with Wright.
Back in, Dragon with a huracanrana, than both wrestlers just lie on the ground for a few seconds before exchanging knife-edge chops from their knees. Dragon gets the advantage after a short dropkick. Dragon goes up top, but Wright crotches him on the turnbuckle, than dropkicks Dragon to the outside of the ring. Wright with a suicide dive, which the announcers are quite surprised at considering Wright usually doesn't do those types of maneuvers. Back in, the two jockey for position, but Ultimo gets the advantage, and does a release Tiger Suplex on Wright which draws a two count. Dragon follows up with a Dragon Suplex with a bridge, but that also only gets two. Dragon picks Wright up and sets him on the top turnbuckle. The two fight on the top before Dragon flips over Wright's back, lands on his feet and powerbombs his opponent. Wright once again kicks out. Dragon is undaunted, and slams Wright down to set up for a moonsault, which connects and draws yet another two count. Dragon tries for another Huracanrana, but Wright rolls through and puts Dragon on his back for a two count. Wright is down, and Dragon tries a top rope attack, but Wright gets up in time and catches Dragon mid-air with a dropkick for another near-fall. Both men perform a series of roll-ups for three more two counts, and Dragon dropkicks Wright into the corner and hoists him on the turnbuckle. Dragon then does a turnaround huracanrana on Wright off the top and follows with his finisher, the Dragon Sleeper, but Wright is able to get to the ropes. Dragon once again tries for the Dragon Sleeper, but Wright counters with a jawbreaker, and then uses his finisher, the German Suplex, to finally defeat the Ultimo Dragon and retain his TV Title. Good match that really didn't get going until it was about 12 minutes in, and had some awkward moments. Nevertheless, I'll give it a 3.05 out of 5.
Mean Gene Okerlund is shown in the back shilling the WCW hotline when the nWo comes running by. Gene goes to see what's going on, and finds one of the 4 Horsemen, Curt Hennig, lying on the floor. Will Hennig be ok for the main event? Time will tell. In the meantime we have a number one contenders match for Steve McMichael's United States Title pitting Jeff Jarrett against Dean Malenko. Mike Tenay has left again, so we're back to three announcers. The action has moved from the first ring to the second ring for this match for some reason. Jarrett sends his manager, Debra McMichael, to the back so there won't be any distractions in the match. Match starts, Jarrett uses a hip toss and then does his trademark strut. Back to action, the two exchange before Jarrett gets sent down hard with a Malenko shoulder block. The two exchange some basic wrestling maneuvers before Malenko takes advantage with some punches. Back down to the mat, Malenko gets the advantage with a dropkick, and Jarrett goes to the outside to catch his breath. Back in, Jarrett gets the advantage with a side headlock, but Malenko is able to whip Jarrett off the ropes and starts peppering him with punches before Jarrett ducks and uses a sleeper hold. Malenko gets to the ropes. Jarrett goes for a vertical suplex on Malenko, but Malenko blocks, lifts Jarrett up and sets him on the top turnbuckle, than Superplexes Jarrett down. Both men are down but get up at the same time. Malneko is back on the attack with a dropkick and a German Suplex, than puts Jarrett in his submission finisher, the Texas Cloverleaf. Jarrett gets to the ropes, but Debra comes back from the, well, back.
Malenko clotheslines Jarrett so hard that both men go flying over the top rope. While Jarrett is talking with Debra, Malenko uses the time to come back in the ring and uses the baseball slide kick to send Jarrett into the guardrail. Malenko starts to go to work on Jarrett near the guardrails before the two go back in, where Malenko gets a two count after a dropkick. The announcers, particularly Zybzsko, are grilling Malenko due to his lack of emotion in the ring, saying it makes him a worse wrestler or something, I don't know. Malenko whips Jarrett into a corner and charges, but Jarrett catches him with a back elbow and all of a sudden starts to work over Malenko's legs to set him up for the Figure-Four. While Jarrett is pulling on Malenko's leg from outside the ring, Malenko kicks him off, than as Jarrett gets on the apron, Malenko sets him up for a suplex. But Jarrett counters with a cross-body, and gets a two count. Malenko with a sleeperhold, but Jarrett gets out and than back suplexes Malenko down near the corner. Jarrett climbs the ropes and dives, but Malenko gets a leg up. However, Jarrett catches the leg and goes for the Figure-Four, and Malenko counters with an inside cradle to get two. A series of holds get two counts for each men, and as the two are countering each other's moves, Malenko does a leapfrog but lands awkwardly on his ankle. Jarrett attacks by clipping the leg and slapping the Figure-Four on Malenko, who has no choice but to give up. Jarrett now gets a U.S. Title shot at Halloween Havoc. However, he left WCW a few weeks later and was in the WWF by the time Halloween Havoc aired. Regardless, this was another good match. I'll say it's a 2.8 out of 5.
The nWo War Games team of Buff Bagwell, Konnan, Syxx, and Kevin Nash do a promo concerning tonight's main event. They promise to put an end to the Four Horsemen tonight, Zbyszko proclaims that the nWo makes him sick. Up next is a tag team match between the Faces of Fear (Meng and Barbarian) and the team of Wrath and Mortis. Why they decided to match up two heel tag teams together is anybody's guess. The Faces of Fear have matching red pants on tonight, a change up from their normal black pants. This is just a brawl early on, as the two teams just beat on each other and use clotheslines and body slams to beat each other down. Mortis comes in, gets backdropped by Meng into Barbarian, who catches and then powerbombs him. Wrath breaks up the count. Barbarian and Meng continue to dominate Mortis until Barbarian gets on the top rope, only for Wrath and Mortis' manager, James Vandenberg, to shake the top rope and crotching Barbarian in the process. While Meng chases Vandenberg, Barbarian recovers and dives off the top, only to be countered with a raised boot from Mortis. Wrath comes in with a pump kick, and the two nearly pin Barbarian after a powerbomb-neckbreaker combo move before Meng breaks up the count.
Wrath is tagged in and uses more punches and kicks to stifle his foe the Barbarian, then uses a backbreaker and an elbow drop to down Barbarian. Cover, but Barbarian gets his foot on the rope. Mortis is tagged in, and uses a variation of the Rocker Dropper where he comes in and drives a fully standing Barbarian down to the mat with his leg hooked around Barbarian's neck. That gets two. Wrath is tagged back in, and uses a top rope clothesline to send Barbarian to the outside, where Mortis dumps some stairs on him while he is down. Back in the ring. Barbarian is set up on the top rope. Meanwhile, Mortis is sitting on Wrath's shoulders, and they perform an Ultra Superplex on Barbarian, which really pops the crowd and the announcers. But Mortis is still down, and that allows Barbarian to get the Hot Tag to Meng, which gets the loudest reaction of the night up to this point. Meng is just clobbering people left and right, superkicking Mortis and pounding away on Wrath. Powerslam on Wrath gets a two before Mortis breaks it up.Mortis is in but gets slammed down by Meng, who climbs the top rope and delivers a picture perfect splash on Mortis. Wrath comes in to break up the count. Barbarian comes in but is disposed of by Wrath. Meanwhile, Vandenberg is on the apron but gets caught in the Tongan Death Grip by Meng. Mortis tries to break it up, but gets a Tongan Death Grip of his own. Wrath comes back in from behind, and delivers a Death Penalty (Rock Bottom) to Meng, which gets the victory for Wrath and Mortis. There wasn't a lot of finesse in this match, just a lot of hard-hitting action. Still, it was quite entertaining, so I'll give it a 3.139 out of 5.
Mean Gene is in the back with an interview with three of the Horsemen, Benoit and McMichael say a bunch of boring stuff before Flair fires up the crowd with his interview. Basically, the point was that they will go on without Hennig, making it a 4 vs. 3 match. Scott Norton comes out for his match against The Giant. The two waste no time as they exchange blows before heading outside the ring to continue battle. Giant picks Norton up on his shoulder, but Norton slips out and throws him into the ring post. Norton tries to suplex the Giant, but takes a suplex of his own instead. Norton gets in the ring first, and clotheslines the Giant back out just as he was stepping into the ring. Back in, the two exchange blows, but Norton goes downstairs, than catches Giant with a Stun Gun. Norton gets Giant in a corner and delivers some heavy blows to him. Finally, Norton gets Giant out of the corner and back suplexes him, but that gets two. Norton argues with the ref, but the Giant grabs a rope and then kips up. Not bad for a 7 foot 450 pound man. Giant with a big boot and a dropkick sends Norton down, and he calls for the Choke Slam. Giant grabs Norton by the throat, lifts him up, and slams him down, getting a three count. Short match which wasn't too bad, but not that good either. I'll give it a 1.5 out of 5. During the replay, Heenan calls Scott Norton Ed Norton. I don't know if he made a mistake or was just referencing the old Honeymooners character, but that's what he called him.
Next is a rematch from last month's Clash of the Champions featuring the nWo team of Randy Savage and Scott Hall against WCW's Diamond Dallas Page and Lex Luger, who have had some issues over the past few weeks. Schiavone makes the claim that Luger has the most recognizable upper body in sports. Um, OK. A test of strength between Hall and Luger starts off the match, and Hall loses. Zbyszko states that Hall is one of the most overrated wrestlers in the business, pulling no punches for their ongoing feud. Luger starts delivering clothesline to both Hall and Savage, and while Hall escapes to the outside, Luger Gorilla Press slams Savage over the top rope onto Hall. Tag into DDP, and he and Hall start going at it. Page gets the advantage with a series of punches and an atomic drop, all of which Hall oversells to comedic proportions. Page with a pancake piledriver on Hall and decks Savage off of the apron. That proves to be a bad idea, as Savage gets angry and trips DDP coming off the rope.
The nWo start double teaming Page, and Hall nearly gets a three count after a powerslam. Savage and Hall have Page trapped in the corner, but DDP escapes only for Savage to catch up and hold him from tagging out to Luger. Hall uses this opportunity to take advantage by slugging Luger on the apron and stomping him down in between the two rings, leaving Luger stuck there. While Luger's stuck, Savage and Hall take turns throwing Page from one ring to another, and while Savage is choking Page with a ring rope, Hall decides to deck the referee for no good reason. Another ref comes out, only to meet the same result. That brings out an enraged Zbyszko, who gets on the ring apron to jaw with Hall. Meanwhile Luger is finally getting up, and after Zbyszko shoves Hall, Luger rolls him up from behind and Zbyszko administers the three count, which is apparently good enough to make this a victory for Luger and Page. Schiavone claims that that moment where Zbyszko counted Hall down is a moment we will never forget. Well until five minutes ago, I had completly forgotten about it. This match was little more than a setup for a future angle, and nobody brought their A game, per se. I'll give it a 1.1 out of 5 and hope to never have to see it again.
Before the main event, Gene shills the Hotline once more. Michael Buffer is out, doing his thing. He comes up with a great line in introducing the match, which goes as follows: "Two teams, one cage. (long dramatic pause), It's time to set the stage, for the rage, of the WAR GAMES~!" Well, I liked it. The rules of War Games are this, there are two teams of four, the match starts with a five minute period of one on one action, there's a coin flip, and whoever wins gets to send their next man in, the losing them sends the next man in after two minutes, and after every two minutes, the teams alternate putting people in the match until everybody is in. At which time, the match can only end by submission or surrender. The two teams are matched up mainly due to a parody that the nWo did of former horseman Arn Anderson's retirement speech, which you can see right after I'm done writing. The cage is lowered, and the nWo team is out first. According to Buffer, this unit of the nWo want to be called the "Now Ready for Prime Time Players". I'm thinking Nash came up with that one. Anyway, Kevin Nash, Buff Bagwell, Syxx and Konnan represent the nWo. The Horsemen team come out, but Curt Hennig is conspicuous by his absence, so Ric Flair, Chris Benoit, and Steve "Mongo" McMichael have to go without him. Bagwell and Benoit will start this match. Benoit dominates early and bounces Bagwell against the cage a couple of times before missing a swan dive headbutt off the top rope. Buff takes this opportunity to mug for the camera and throws Benoit against the cage. Both men get up, Benoit charges at Buff but gets backdropped into the cage wall, nearly landing head first on the mat. Buff stomps on Benoit some. The nWo wins the cointoss, but Benoit is starting to regain control of the match. Konnan comes in and tries to dive onto Benoit, but gets kicked on the way down. Benoit with a snap suplex on Konnan and a bodyslam on Bagwell. Once both men are up, Benoit sends them flying into the cage. The numbers prove to be too much, as Bagwell catches Benoit with a kick to the gut and Konnan DDTs him down to the mat. Bagwell takes this time to again mug for the camera.
The three men take the fight to the other ring but never mind that shit, HERE COMES MONGO! He makes his presence felt by delivering clotheslines and bodyslams to both of his opponents. Three point stance into football tackle by Mongo onto Konnan. YEAH! The two Horsemen are in control but here comes Syxx. But Benoit sees him coming and catches him with a brutal clothesline. The Horsemen continue to take the fight to the opponent, and Mongo picks Syxx up and slams him against the roof of the cage. Benoit with the Crippler Crossface on Syxx, and Bagwell breaks it up quickly, much to my delight. I'm not going to get into why that delighted me, but if you know much about Chris Benoit than you might know why. Benoit gets up and throws Syxx into the cage, but that is ignored by the announcers because Curt Hennig has come from the back with his arm in a sling. Flair enters the ring with knife-edge chops for everyone. The Horsemen spend the next two minutes dominating the nWo until Kevin Nash comes in. Nash goes after Flair, whips him into the ropes and sidewalk slams him down. Benoit comes over, but Nash picks him up and slams him back first against the cage. While Mongo is still fighting Konnan, Nash catches him with a big boot and all three Horsemen are down. Buff once again takes this time to mug for the camera. You know, Bagwell knew where the cameras were more than any other wrestler I've ever seen. In a way I almost admire that, but at the same time it gets annoying rather quickly. Syxx is rubbing Flair's face into the cage, but the camera focuses on Hennig. There's some brawling going on between the two teams, and Flair has Syxx in the Figure Four when Hennig comes in. He takes off the sling to reveal two pairs of handcuffs, much to the delight of the crowd. The crowd turns on Hennig about ten seconds later when he hits his teammates Mongo and Benoit with the cuffs and goes right after Flair. Benoit and Mongo are being handcuffed to the cage while the rest of the nWo take turns stomping on Flair. Nash gets a mic and asks if Benoit and Mongo want to surrender, but they refuse. Flair continues to take a beating while Bagwell takes the mic and asks Benoit if he wants to quit, and gets spit on for his efforts. Jacknife powerbomb by Nash onto Flair, and Mongo and Benoit both continue refusing surrender. Finally, Hennig drags Flair and positions his head near the cage door, and Nash threatens that unless the Horsemen quit, Hennig is going to slam the door into Flair's head. Mongo surrenders, but Hennig's such an evil guy that he slams the door in Flair's face anyway. To be honest, it didn't look quite as bad as the announcers were making it out to be, but it still looked painful enough. The nWo wins, Nash proclaims that the Horsemen are dead and Schiavone calls this the most sickening night of his life. Flair would come back a month later and feud with Hennig, so I guess it wasn't that bad. The match was decent enough but the ending kind of sucked the life out of the crowd and really made the Horsemen look like idiots. Plus, even at the time, you could see Hennig's turn coming a mile away. I'll give it a 2.40 out of 5.
Overall, despite the down note it ended it, WCW Fall Brawl 1997 wasn't a bad pay-per-view. Three were three rather good matches and two others that were decent as well. The worst match was the nWo-Page and Luger match, but even that served its purpose. I'll give the show en masse a 6.5 out of 10, as it was three hours of good wrestling action. Well, thanks for reading this monstrosity of a post, and if you have any thoughts about Fall Brawl 97, feel free to leave a comment. Also, if you have ideas for future reviews, than send them me via e-mail at kthec2001@gmail.com. I leave you with the nWo mocking the Horsemen on Nitro:
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Canon Review List-A-Mania: The Ten Worst Wrestling Themes
As you could probably tell from reading this blog, I like pro wrestling. Not as much as I used to, but I still I admit to liking it. Part of watching pro wrestling is that you get to hear a lot of mostly bad music that serve as the "themes" or introductions to the wrestlers. Oh sure, there are some good themes, like Ric Flair coming out to "Also Sprach Zachtura" (aka the theme from 2001: A Space Odyssey) or Edge, who uses Alter Bridge's "Metalingus". But a lot of it you wouldn't want to be caught listening to. The worst of these themes makes you embarrassed to hear it, they're so bad. So, here are the top 10 worst themes in wrestling, and believe me I could have easily made this a top 30.
10. Cactus Jack's WCW Theme (Mr. Bang Bang)
This is from the somewhat infamous WCW Slam Jam album, which had a lot of other candidates for this list. In fact, there is another song from that CD upcoming on the list. For now, let's focus on Mr. Bang Bang. The person signing seems to marbles in his mouth, they're doing an awful rip-off of ZZ Top, and the lyrics are ridicoulous (i.e. "He's a strange as a man can be, He ain't got no family"). Also, at the end they put a bunch of random sound effects in, including a phone ringing.
9. Theme for X-Factor (performed by Uncle Kracker)
Anything that combines X-Pac and Uncle Kracker is bound to disliked by most wrestling fans, and this song does not disappoint. Unlike most wrestling themes, which are designed to grab people's attention by starting out loud, this one starts out soft. Plus, it's an Uncle Kracker song, so how good is it going to be in the first place.
8. Chyna's WWE Theme
This is particularly hard to listen to. The same lines are repeated over and over for three minutes, and the song sounds like as if it's performed by the world's worst version of Evanescence. I've got two words to describe this song, just brutal.
7. Buff Bagwell's WCW Theme (Buff Daddy)
Yep, it's Buff Bagwell singing his own theme, while some female backup vocalists keep saying "Buff Daddy" and "Buff is the stuff" ad nauseum. It's enough to make someone cry. Also, what exactly is a "Buff Daddy" anyway?
6. "I'm an Ass Man" (Billy Gunn theme)
Billy Gunn's had some rough themes to listen to (the "Rockabilly" theme is particularly bad), but this one takes the cake due to its pure absurdity. In this song, a man proclaims his love for asses, whether looking at them, kicking them, or "sticking them". He is lover of every kind, and proclaims that "the best surprises always sneak up from behind" With this theme, it's small wonder that Billy Gunn's main event push never took off in 1999.
5. Bastion Booger's theme
The Bastion Booger's whole gimmick was that he was a nasty fat guy, so I guess it made sense to have a theme with noises of snoring and farting and who knows what other bodily functions. They decided to set those noises to some music you might here in Silent Hill or some other suspense game or movie. It makes for a strange combination, but I wouldn't say it's good. In fact, it's almost unlistenable.
4. Rob Van Dam's TNA Theme
My goodness is this annoying. All it is is some band trying to play the worst possible metal music possible while the lead singer growls on about Rob Van Dam and his moves. This goes on for three minutes, and after about 10 seconds it becomes hard to take. To make matters worse, it gets stuck in your head after one listen, like an annoying fly that just won't go away no matter what you try to do. However, it's not the worst theme in TNA today, because that would be . . .
3. Jeff Hardy's TNA Theme
This song is called Modest, and is performed by Jeff Hardy's own band Peroxwhy?gen. With a name like that, you would expect bad music, and by golly this song does not disappoint. Jeff Hardy can do a lot of things, he can wrestle, he can build a volcano in his own backyard and he can paint his face with the best of them, but one thing Mr. Hardy can not do is sing, and this song makes that fact painfully clear.
2. Ricky Steamboat's WCW Theme (Family Man)
Ricky Steamboat is a true legend in the professional wrestling world, but WCW decided that instead of giving "The Dragon" a good or at least passable theme, they decided to give Steamboat a theme that sounds like the opening song to some cheesy 80s song. I really can't decide which part I hate the most, from the sappy lyrics to the annoying background music to the singer who tries to scream certain lyrics but it ends up sounding like a nearly incomprehensible growl. This song is 31 flavors of awful, but the next song is 63 flavors of awful, so this only finishes number two.
1. American Males Theme
This song is so bad that goes all the way around to being good, and then goes around to be bad once again. Words can not describe this song, so just listen to it and you'll know why it top (or bottoms) the list of the worst theme songs in wrestling history.
Well, thanks for reading. I'm pretty sure I didn't get all the bad themes on this list, so if your favorite (or least favorite) theme didn't make the cut, than feel free to share it. Also, if you have any ideas for future reviews, than give them to me either by e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com or by leaving a comment on this blog.
10. Cactus Jack's WCW Theme (Mr. Bang Bang)
This is from the somewhat infamous WCW Slam Jam album, which had a lot of other candidates for this list. In fact, there is another song from that CD upcoming on the list. For now, let's focus on Mr. Bang Bang. The person signing seems to marbles in his mouth, they're doing an awful rip-off of ZZ Top, and the lyrics are ridicoulous (i.e. "He's a strange as a man can be, He ain't got no family"). Also, at the end they put a bunch of random sound effects in, including a phone ringing.
9. Theme for X-Factor (performed by Uncle Kracker)
Anything that combines X-Pac and Uncle Kracker is bound to disliked by most wrestling fans, and this song does not disappoint. Unlike most wrestling themes, which are designed to grab people's attention by starting out loud, this one starts out soft. Plus, it's an Uncle Kracker song, so how good is it going to be in the first place.
8. Chyna's WWE Theme
This is particularly hard to listen to. The same lines are repeated over and over for three minutes, and the song sounds like as if it's performed by the world's worst version of Evanescence. I've got two words to describe this song, just brutal.
7. Buff Bagwell's WCW Theme (Buff Daddy)
Yep, it's Buff Bagwell singing his own theme, while some female backup vocalists keep saying "Buff Daddy" and "Buff is the stuff" ad nauseum. It's enough to make someone cry. Also, what exactly is a "Buff Daddy" anyway?
6. "I'm an Ass Man" (Billy Gunn theme)
Billy Gunn's had some rough themes to listen to (the "Rockabilly" theme is particularly bad), but this one takes the cake due to its pure absurdity. In this song, a man proclaims his love for asses, whether looking at them, kicking them, or "sticking them". He is lover of every kind, and proclaims that "the best surprises always sneak up from behind" With this theme, it's small wonder that Billy Gunn's main event push never took off in 1999.
5. Bastion Booger's theme
The Bastion Booger's whole gimmick was that he was a nasty fat guy, so I guess it made sense to have a theme with noises of snoring and farting and who knows what other bodily functions. They decided to set those noises to some music you might here in Silent Hill or some other suspense game or movie. It makes for a strange combination, but I wouldn't say it's good. In fact, it's almost unlistenable.
4. Rob Van Dam's TNA Theme
My goodness is this annoying. All it is is some band trying to play the worst possible metal music possible while the lead singer growls on about Rob Van Dam and his moves. This goes on for three minutes, and after about 10 seconds it becomes hard to take. To make matters worse, it gets stuck in your head after one listen, like an annoying fly that just won't go away no matter what you try to do. However, it's not the worst theme in TNA today, because that would be . . .
3. Jeff Hardy's TNA Theme
This song is called Modest, and is performed by Jeff Hardy's own band Peroxwhy?gen. With a name like that, you would expect bad music, and by golly this song does not disappoint. Jeff Hardy can do a lot of things, he can wrestle, he can build a volcano in his own backyard and he can paint his face with the best of them, but one thing Mr. Hardy can not do is sing, and this song makes that fact painfully clear.
2. Ricky Steamboat's WCW Theme (Family Man)
Ricky Steamboat is a true legend in the professional wrestling world, but WCW decided that instead of giving "The Dragon" a good or at least passable theme, they decided to give Steamboat a theme that sounds like the opening song to some cheesy 80s song. I really can't decide which part I hate the most, from the sappy lyrics to the annoying background music to the singer who tries to scream certain lyrics but it ends up sounding like a nearly incomprehensible growl. This song is 31 flavors of awful, but the next song is 63 flavors of awful, so this only finishes number two.
1. American Males Theme
This song is so bad that goes all the way around to being good, and then goes around to be bad once again. Words can not describe this song, so just listen to it and you'll know why it top (or bottoms) the list of the worst theme songs in wrestling history.
Well, thanks for reading. I'm pretty sure I didn't get all the bad themes on this list, so if your favorite (or least favorite) theme didn't make the cut, than feel free to share it. Also, if you have any ideas for future reviews, than give them to me either by e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com or by leaving a comment on this blog.
Labels:
American Males,
bad music,
Buff Bagwell,
Chyna,
themes,
TNA,
Uncle Kracker,
WCW Slam Jam,
wrestling
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Canon Wrestling Review: WCW Monday Nitro: October 26, 1998
Earlier today, reader Ben W. and I were reminiscing about the time preliminary wrestler Kenny Kaos was suddenly given one half of the Tag Team Titles by Rick Steiner on an episode of Nitro. I liked thinking about it so much that I decided to watch that very show when it happened. So strap up and hold on tight, as we review the October 26, 1998 version of WCW Monday Nitro.
We start with dancing from the Nitro Girls and some fireworks. The usual gang of idiots are here, but before the show starts, Tony Schiavone has some bidness to take care of. See, the night before was WCW Halloween Havoc, and due to the fact that they went 20 minutes over schedule, some people did not get to see the conclusion of the show, which was the conclusion to that God-awful Hogan-Warrior match and the entire main event between Diamond Dallas Page and WCW Champion Goldberg. So, out of the kindness of their hearts, WCW has decided to air the entire main event unedited during the broadcast. According to Schiavone, the competition is claiming that this is a ratings ploy, but to prove those bastards wrong, the match will air at 9:00 eastern at the beginning of the second hour. Oddly enough, that's when the competition is supposed to start their show. Coincidence? Larry Zybszko says that technology is not perfect and if you think this is bad "wait until the KY2 bug hits in the year 2000". That sounds awful, thank goodness that didn't happen.
DANGER! HIGH VOLTAGE! Out comes Kaos to no reaction. He faces off against Stevie Ray of the nWo, who the announcers decry for having the gall to refer to himself as the "enforcer" of the nWo. Hey, that's Arn Anderson's name, come up with something else. Ray beats up Kaos both inside and outside the ring, and says something incoherent into the camera. Kaos comes back with a springboard clothesline, which brings out Buff Bagwell. Bagwell throws Stevie Ray his slapjack and distracts the referee long enough for Stevie to nail Kaos with it. Stevie than hits his finisher, also known as the slapjack (double underhook facebuster). How odd. Ray gets the three and the nWo puts the boots to Kaos. That brings out Rick Steiner with a T-shirt underneath his singlet to chase them off. Rick grabs a mic and says, hey Kaos, mind being my partner in defending the tag titles tonight? Kaos, not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, accepts. Of all the people Steiner could have chosen, he chose a guy that already got beat down by the nWo and hasn't won a match in about two years unless its against Lodi or somebody like that. Now the fans are treated to two Kaos matches in one night. That will bring in the ratings.
Next is the late, great Kanyon taking on the still living but merely average Prince Iaukea. Kanyon asks the crowd, "Who's better than Kanyon?" which gets a lot of responses but not the one Kanyon was looking for, so he kicks Iaukea in the gut and starts the match in anger. Kanyon is on offense for most of the match, but Iaukea gets a couple of moves in, including a backdrop out of an attempted piledriver on the stairs by Kanyon and a springboard senton on a standing Kanyon. Of course, the announcers are too busy talking about how Rick Steiner won the Tag Team titles last night against three men by himself. Kanyon could have taken a leak in the middle of the ring and they'd still be talking about Rick Steiner or the great decision made to air the DDP-Goldberg match on this show. Kanyon counters a backslide into the Flatliner, and pins his opponent for the three count. He then proclaims himself the King of the World, a la Leo DiCaprio in Titanic. Decent enough match, although not enough time was given to make it worthwhile.
The Nitro Girls are dancing around the announce table, which causes Tony and Mike Tenay to react like they've never seen a woman before. Gene Okerlund is in the ring, and he introduces the Four Horseman, which causes Tony to yell in the mic in approval. There's no Mongo McMichael here for some reason, but Ric Flair assures us that he'll be here later. Well, let's hope not. Flair goes on about how Eric Bischoff will fail in his attempts to block him from wrestling, which brings out a rather pale looking Bischoff. Bischoff says that he's made a mistake, that he's underestimated the fans love of Ric Flair and that we will see Ric Flair wrestle tonight. Flair says Hell yeah, bring out anybody and he'll take them on. The announcers are optimistic but cautious of Bischoff's true intentions.
There's a video shown of this week's winning Nitro Party, with a bunch of dumb wannabe frat boys acting like Konnan and Bagwell while watching Nitro. Stills are shown of last night's Kevin Nash vs. Scott Hall match, where Nash just walked away after powerbombing Hall twice. We go to the entrance ramp, where Alex Wright comes out to face Barry Horowitz. The announcers spend most of the match talking about what nice guys they are for showing last night's PPV Main Event. Wright, to the surprise of absolutely no one, is in control most of the match, although Horowitz counters a top rope dive from Wright. Horowitz does his patented pat on the back, before messing up his own top rope move. Wright hits the Rude Awakening on Horowitz and gets the victory. He then celebrates by doing his stupid dance. Match was short and not that great.
Lee Marshall announces the location of next week's Nitro, which I don't care enough to remember, and then we get a recap of last night's Hogan-Warrior match, which I believe was named the worst match of the year. The announcers have decided that the match was too graphic to show on the air even though some people didn't see the ending. It also sucked on ice. Anyway, Horace Hogan helped his uncle win a week after his uncle brained him with a steel chair, leaving 11 stitches on Horace's head.
Sick Boy comes out to be squashed by Wrath, who actually gets quite a good reaction from the fans. Sick Boy gets almost no offense in, and Wrath gets to show off his skills, including a slingshot shoulderblock and a bunch of power moves. Wrath sets up Sick Boy for the Meltdown (pumphandle slam), which gets a HUGE reaction from the fans. Wrath gives the fans what they want and gets the victory to the delight of the crowd. Match was a squash, but man these people were really digging Wrath at this time. Too bad he had to rug pulled out from under him a few weeks later.
The announcers remind us that Ric Flair will wrestle and that now is finally the time to show the Page-Goldberg match. Michael Buffer does the ring announcing for this match, noting that Page is from the Jersey Shore by way of the school of Hard Knocks, just like The Situation. Page comes through the crowd, while Goldberg comes out accompanying by a 10 man security force for reasons that are unknown to me even to this day. Match starts, and each man can't get an advantage, although it's clear that Goldberg is the superior athlete. Goldberg does a backflip to counter a Page leg sweep, which impresses everybody. For the first few minutes, Goldberg seems to be targeting the arm of Page, presumably to prevent him from using the Diamond Cutter. Goldberg retains control until Page does a headscissors out of a power slam attempt. Didn't think Page could do that move. Goldberg side kicks Page in the chest, backing him into the corner. He then goes for the spear, but Page moves and Goldberg slams his shoulders into the ring post. Goldberg's hurt his arm, which allows Page to hit a flying clothesline and then counter a spinebuster into a tornado DDT. Page calls for the Diamond Cutter, but Goldberg has none of that and spears Page to the ground. But it's with his bum shoulder. The two slowly get up, and Goldberg goes for the Jackhammer, but hasn't the strength to do it. He finally gets Page up, but Page counters with the Diamond Cutter! The crowd explodes after that, but Page doesn't have enough energy to make the cover. Page finally gets the cover, but only gets a two count. Page then tries a suplex, but unfortunately for him Goldberg is able to counter and use the Jackhammer on Page. Goldberg gets the win in what was his best match to date at this point, and may be the best match of his career. Great match, I would recommend it to anyone if you want to see good wrestling.
Now back to the crap. Gene catches up with Kevin Nash in his dressing room, which has two couches and a bathroom for some reason. Gene asks Nash why he didn't pin Scott Hall, but wait a minute, Hall is in the room as well. What's going on? Nash just wants his friend back, and Hall admits that last night he "hit a wall" and realized some things. Just when you think the two will become friends again, The Giant sneaks in and beats Nash up. Hall joins in, and eventually they pick up Nash and throw him through a wall. I guess Nash was the one that hit the wall after all.
A video of the Nitro Girls is shown, before we go back live to see the Nitro Girls dance. That was unnecessary, but I don't mind. The nWo Hollywood contingent comes out, with new member Horace Hogan. Somebody forgets to turn up the mic, so Bischoff repeats this stupid line three times: "Life is good when you're with Hollywood". Hulk Hogan gets the mic, says that when you wear the black and white you do it for life and that in order to do so, you must prove your loyalty by stabbing yourself in the heart in the name of Hollywood. The hell? Which brings us to Horace, as he "passed the test" last night and is given the nWo T-shirt and a nWo weightbelt. Hulk calls Horace the "most important, most valuable member of nWo Hollywood". It must be opposite day for the nWo. Strange promo.
Zbyszko is replaced by Bobby Heenan, and Tony wastes no time in expressing his displeasure about it. Watching these old Nitros is somewhat interesting now just because of the thinly-veiled comments both Tony and Bobby have for each other, as you can really feel the hatred between the two. Try watching a Nitro from say, 97 onward, and you'll be able to pick up on that rather easily. Anyway, Perry Saturn comes out, with a new vest that looks, um, interesting. He is followed by Eddy Guerrero who was the leader of the lWo at this time. This should be a good match, but Eddy at this point was burnt out, so we shall see. Saturn uses an overhead belly-to-belly early on, but Guerrero gains the advantage after dropkicking Saturn's knee. Guerrero then continues the attack on the leg. Guerrero does his trademark slingshot somersault, this time on Saturn's knee. After a few more moves, Saturn is able to gain the advantage after turning a tornado DDT into a Northern Lights suplex. From there, Saturn starts throwing around Eddy with his T-Bone suplex and a Falcon Arrow, which of course the announcers don't know the name of. Saturn signals for the DVD, which brings out lWo members Damian 666 and Hector Garza. Saturn has little problem fighting them off, overhead belly-to-belly suplexing both of them quite nicely. This brings out the rest of the lWo, including a guy who nobody knows. The unknown man, who btw is Eddy's close personal friend Art Flores, uses a sweet brainbuster on Saturn, setting him up for a frog splash by Eddy. The lWo celebrates the beatdown of Saturn. Decent match, could of been better if given more time, but what can you do.
Gene-O is at the entrance ramp, he brings out Judy Bagwell. The crowd is on the edge of their seats with anticipation over what Buff's mom will say. Judy is tired of Buff's actions, and says that he has disgraced the Bagwell name. Brother Jeff is pissed at Buff, I am sure. Mrs. Bagwell goes on to say that she loves Marcus with all of her heart, but she's had enough of Buff. Me too, and he's only been on the show for a minute thus far.
The Giant and Stevie Ray come out representing the nWo against the newly-minted tag team Champions Rick Steiner and Kenny Kaos. Just because Kaos has to wrestle twice doesn't make it okay to subject us to two Stevie Ray matches in one night. Where's Bryan Adams when you need him? Predictably, the nWo beats up Kaos something fierce, or as fierce as the 550 pound Giant can at this point. To call him unmotivated is an understatement. Rick gets tagged in, hits a Steinerline for what looked like a three count but was only two, but the nWo take over again. Double team coming, but Kaos distracts the Giant, allowing Steiner to backdrop Stevie Ray. Steiner then hits a dangerous looking bulldog off the top on Stevie Ray and the champs retain. Good for them, although things would get worse once Steiner decided to make Judy Bagwell a tag team champion a few weeks later. Match was awful, however it was short at least.
Fireworks go off to signify the third hour of Nitro and to wake up the crowd after that last match. Eric Bischoff has replaced Tenay on commentary, which is a lateral move as far as I'm concerned. Bischoff says that he is a man of his word and we will see Flair wrestle, and he delivers, sort of. Instead of a live match, we get clips from Flair vs. Hulk Hogan at Bash at the Beach 1994, with all of the clips shown to make Flair look bad against the Hulkster. Well, technically, Bischoff didn't lie, but it's still crap. Mr. T and Shaquille O'Neal were there at ringside and Hogan wins with a legdrop and celebrates with the two. Bischoff says that this just shows that Flair will always be second best to the Hulkster. He asks the announcers how Flair looked, and Heenan says not too good, which causes Tony to scream at him. I bet Heenan just wanted to pop Schiavone on many days.
The Cruiserweight Title is on the line in this next match, as Juventud Guerrera takes on the champion, Billy Kidman, whose normally white shirt is now an ugly shade of gray. Wash your shirt, Kidman. This match was quite fun, as they start out fast and just pick up speed from there. A lot of two counts and great looking manuevers by these two wrestlers packed into six minutes. The end comes after Juvi learns you can't power bomb Kidman, as he counters with a Tiger Bomb, setting him up for a Shooting Star Press, which he landed perfectly for once. Kidman gets the win and the crowd shows its appreciation. Back to the announce table, where a Sting and Macho Man video are both plugged. Heenan tries to steal one of the videos, but Tony catches him in the act.
The nWo music plays for the 293rd time tonight, and this time Scott Steiner and son of Judy Bagwell come out. Steiner asks if the ladies love him for his mind or his body, and to that I say what mind? Bagwell is angry at his mother, and says that women belong at home cooking and cleaning. Buff than implores his dad to put Judy back in her place. So now Buff hates all women? Steiner than calls out J.J. Dillon to set up a match between him and his brother. Dillon comes out, says something about it being late in the show so you can't have your rematch. Steiner then says that he's an honest man but he has lied. Okay. Instead, Steiner has two questions for Dillon. One, why did the referee that started the match last night didn't finish the match, and two, well we never get that far as Dillon gets beaten up for failing to answer the first one correctly. Security tries to break it up, but Scott puts Dillon in the Steiner Recliner while Buff runs interference.
The Warrior's music plays, which the announcers act like they've never heard before even though the dude's been in the company for three months by now. Warrior gets a pretty good reaction from the crowd, and then proceed es to speak about how Hogan is a chicken or something. Warrior proceeds to drop an S-bomb during the interview. I don't think you can do that. He says Hogan has opened the door to Warrior's hell, and that he is the gatekeeper. Well good for you Warrior. Hogan comes out, followed quickly by Horace and Bischoff, and not so quickly by The Giant. Horace attacks first but gets clotheslined out of the ring for his trouble. The Giant comes in, but sufferes the same fate, but that allows Hogan to clubber on Warrior from behind. Warrior recovers, delivers a flying shoulder tackle to Hogan, and the Warrior stands tall in the ring. He wouldn't be in WCW much longer after this, however.
There's a commercial for WCW Bashin' Brawlers that is shown. Hey, I used to have some of those. They would scream out whenever you put pressure on a body part, for example, if you twist their arm, they would say "OW, you're hurting my left arm" They only made one for the big names, like Page, Savage, and Hogan. If only they made one for Van Hammer. The nWo music plays yet again, bringing out Scotts Hall and Steiner. Lex Luger and Konnan come out, and we have a tag match that quickly degenerates into an all-out brawl. Luger squares off with Hall while Steiner and Konnan fight. It's interesting that whenever one pair goes to the outside, the other pair go back to the inside of the ring. Well, maybe not interesting. Eventually, Luger hits Hall with the bionic forearm and signals for the Torture Rack, but Steiner comes to stop that with a low blow. Konnan brings a steel chair, and crushes Steiner on the head with it. Luger than jabs Hall with the chair. The two teams keep fighting until commercial, and the match is eventually declared a no-contest. Meh.
Michael Buffer is here to announce the main event, a match for the U.S. Title between DDP and the Champion Bret Hart. Buffer gets Hart's name right this time, something he has struggled with before. The two trade moves for a while, and it's a good back-and-forth affair between the two. Hart starts to take control after a Russian Leg Sweep and a DDT on DDP, which the announcers seemed to find funny. Hart gets a two after the DDT, and starts freaking out on Mickey Jay, which gives Page the opening to hit the Cactus Jack clothesline and a pancake. Page goes up top, but Hart catches him and superplexs his foe down to the mat. Only two, Page small packages Hart for two, but the Hitman regains control with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Flying elbow off the second rope by Hart, but Page gets out at two, which causes Hart to call Mickey Jay's mother a whore or something. Page takes Hart down with a Fujiwara armbar, but instead of holding on, he just lets go. That was awkward. Page gets Hart in the corner, bashes his head into the turnbuckle, but Hart manages to mule-kick both Page and the ref in the jewels. Hart digs out some knucks, revives the ref, but Page suddenly catches him with the Diamond Cutter. On this night, that would be enough, and we have a new U.S. Champion. This does not please Hart, as he gets a chair and starts attacking Page's leg with it. He puts DDP in the sharpshooter, which cause Page to scream in agony. Hart eventually tires of that, and goes back to bashing Page's leg with the chair before Goldberg comes out just as the show was ending. Good match, not great, but good.
Overall, this show was made a lot better due to the airing of Page-Goldberg, but even so it was still just an average show. At least there were two good matches in the final hour in Kidman-Juvi and Hart-Page, but all the nWo stuff was either boring or just plain dumb. I'll give this show an overall score of 4.89 out of 10. Tomorrow at The Canon Review, we pay tribute to Kenny Kaos, for no good reason whatsoever. But until then, if you have any better ideas for reviews, than send them to me either by leaving a comment or by e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com. Here's some videos from this episode of Nitro.
We start with dancing from the Nitro Girls and some fireworks. The usual gang of idiots are here, but before the show starts, Tony Schiavone has some bidness to take care of. See, the night before was WCW Halloween Havoc, and due to the fact that they went 20 minutes over schedule, some people did not get to see the conclusion of the show, which was the conclusion to that God-awful Hogan-Warrior match and the entire main event between Diamond Dallas Page and WCW Champion Goldberg. So, out of the kindness of their hearts, WCW has decided to air the entire main event unedited during the broadcast. According to Schiavone, the competition is claiming that this is a ratings ploy, but to prove those bastards wrong, the match will air at 9:00 eastern at the beginning of the second hour. Oddly enough, that's when the competition is supposed to start their show. Coincidence? Larry Zybszko says that technology is not perfect and if you think this is bad "wait until the KY2 bug hits in the year 2000". That sounds awful, thank goodness that didn't happen.
DANGER! HIGH VOLTAGE! Out comes Kaos to no reaction. He faces off against Stevie Ray of the nWo, who the announcers decry for having the gall to refer to himself as the "enforcer" of the nWo. Hey, that's Arn Anderson's name, come up with something else. Ray beats up Kaos both inside and outside the ring, and says something incoherent into the camera. Kaos comes back with a springboard clothesline, which brings out Buff Bagwell. Bagwell throws Stevie Ray his slapjack and distracts the referee long enough for Stevie to nail Kaos with it. Stevie than hits his finisher, also known as the slapjack (double underhook facebuster). How odd. Ray gets the three and the nWo puts the boots to Kaos. That brings out Rick Steiner with a T-shirt underneath his singlet to chase them off. Rick grabs a mic and says, hey Kaos, mind being my partner in defending the tag titles tonight? Kaos, not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, accepts. Of all the people Steiner could have chosen, he chose a guy that already got beat down by the nWo and hasn't won a match in about two years unless its against Lodi or somebody like that. Now the fans are treated to two Kaos matches in one night. That will bring in the ratings.
Next is the late, great Kanyon taking on the still living but merely average Prince Iaukea. Kanyon asks the crowd, "Who's better than Kanyon?" which gets a lot of responses but not the one Kanyon was looking for, so he kicks Iaukea in the gut and starts the match in anger. Kanyon is on offense for most of the match, but Iaukea gets a couple of moves in, including a backdrop out of an attempted piledriver on the stairs by Kanyon and a springboard senton on a standing Kanyon. Of course, the announcers are too busy talking about how Rick Steiner won the Tag Team titles last night against three men by himself. Kanyon could have taken a leak in the middle of the ring and they'd still be talking about Rick Steiner or the great decision made to air the DDP-Goldberg match on this show. Kanyon counters a backslide into the Flatliner, and pins his opponent for the three count. He then proclaims himself the King of the World, a la Leo DiCaprio in Titanic. Decent enough match, although not enough time was given to make it worthwhile.
The Nitro Girls are dancing around the announce table, which causes Tony and Mike Tenay to react like they've never seen a woman before. Gene Okerlund is in the ring, and he introduces the Four Horseman, which causes Tony to yell in the mic in approval. There's no Mongo McMichael here for some reason, but Ric Flair assures us that he'll be here later. Well, let's hope not. Flair goes on about how Eric Bischoff will fail in his attempts to block him from wrestling, which brings out a rather pale looking Bischoff. Bischoff says that he's made a mistake, that he's underestimated the fans love of Ric Flair and that we will see Ric Flair wrestle tonight. Flair says Hell yeah, bring out anybody and he'll take them on. The announcers are optimistic but cautious of Bischoff's true intentions.
There's a video shown of this week's winning Nitro Party, with a bunch of dumb wannabe frat boys acting like Konnan and Bagwell while watching Nitro. Stills are shown of last night's Kevin Nash vs. Scott Hall match, where Nash just walked away after powerbombing Hall twice. We go to the entrance ramp, where Alex Wright comes out to face Barry Horowitz. The announcers spend most of the match talking about what nice guys they are for showing last night's PPV Main Event. Wright, to the surprise of absolutely no one, is in control most of the match, although Horowitz counters a top rope dive from Wright. Horowitz does his patented pat on the back, before messing up his own top rope move. Wright hits the Rude Awakening on Horowitz and gets the victory. He then celebrates by doing his stupid dance. Match was short and not that great.
Lee Marshall announces the location of next week's Nitro, which I don't care enough to remember, and then we get a recap of last night's Hogan-Warrior match, which I believe was named the worst match of the year. The announcers have decided that the match was too graphic to show on the air even though some people didn't see the ending. It also sucked on ice. Anyway, Horace Hogan helped his uncle win a week after his uncle brained him with a steel chair, leaving 11 stitches on Horace's head.
Sick Boy comes out to be squashed by Wrath, who actually gets quite a good reaction from the fans. Sick Boy gets almost no offense in, and Wrath gets to show off his skills, including a slingshot shoulderblock and a bunch of power moves. Wrath sets up Sick Boy for the Meltdown (pumphandle slam), which gets a HUGE reaction from the fans. Wrath gives the fans what they want and gets the victory to the delight of the crowd. Match was a squash, but man these people were really digging Wrath at this time. Too bad he had to rug pulled out from under him a few weeks later.
The announcers remind us that Ric Flair will wrestle and that now is finally the time to show the Page-Goldberg match. Michael Buffer does the ring announcing for this match, noting that Page is from the Jersey Shore by way of the school of Hard Knocks, just like The Situation. Page comes through the crowd, while Goldberg comes out accompanying by a 10 man security force for reasons that are unknown to me even to this day. Match starts, and each man can't get an advantage, although it's clear that Goldberg is the superior athlete. Goldberg does a backflip to counter a Page leg sweep, which impresses everybody. For the first few minutes, Goldberg seems to be targeting the arm of Page, presumably to prevent him from using the Diamond Cutter. Goldberg retains control until Page does a headscissors out of a power slam attempt. Didn't think Page could do that move. Goldberg side kicks Page in the chest, backing him into the corner. He then goes for the spear, but Page moves and Goldberg slams his shoulders into the ring post. Goldberg's hurt his arm, which allows Page to hit a flying clothesline and then counter a spinebuster into a tornado DDT. Page calls for the Diamond Cutter, but Goldberg has none of that and spears Page to the ground. But it's with his bum shoulder. The two slowly get up, and Goldberg goes for the Jackhammer, but hasn't the strength to do it. He finally gets Page up, but Page counters with the Diamond Cutter! The crowd explodes after that, but Page doesn't have enough energy to make the cover. Page finally gets the cover, but only gets a two count. Page then tries a suplex, but unfortunately for him Goldberg is able to counter and use the Jackhammer on Page. Goldberg gets the win in what was his best match to date at this point, and may be the best match of his career. Great match, I would recommend it to anyone if you want to see good wrestling.
Now back to the crap. Gene catches up with Kevin Nash in his dressing room, which has two couches and a bathroom for some reason. Gene asks Nash why he didn't pin Scott Hall, but wait a minute, Hall is in the room as well. What's going on? Nash just wants his friend back, and Hall admits that last night he "hit a wall" and realized some things. Just when you think the two will become friends again, The Giant sneaks in and beats Nash up. Hall joins in, and eventually they pick up Nash and throw him through a wall. I guess Nash was the one that hit the wall after all.
A video of the Nitro Girls is shown, before we go back live to see the Nitro Girls dance. That was unnecessary, but I don't mind. The nWo Hollywood contingent comes out, with new member Horace Hogan. Somebody forgets to turn up the mic, so Bischoff repeats this stupid line three times: "Life is good when you're with Hollywood". Hulk Hogan gets the mic, says that when you wear the black and white you do it for life and that in order to do so, you must prove your loyalty by stabbing yourself in the heart in the name of Hollywood. The hell? Which brings us to Horace, as he "passed the test" last night and is given the nWo T-shirt and a nWo weightbelt. Hulk calls Horace the "most important, most valuable member of nWo Hollywood". It must be opposite day for the nWo. Strange promo.
Zbyszko is replaced by Bobby Heenan, and Tony wastes no time in expressing his displeasure about it. Watching these old Nitros is somewhat interesting now just because of the thinly-veiled comments both Tony and Bobby have for each other, as you can really feel the hatred between the two. Try watching a Nitro from say, 97 onward, and you'll be able to pick up on that rather easily. Anyway, Perry Saturn comes out, with a new vest that looks, um, interesting. He is followed by Eddy Guerrero who was the leader of the lWo at this time. This should be a good match, but Eddy at this point was burnt out, so we shall see. Saturn uses an overhead belly-to-belly early on, but Guerrero gains the advantage after dropkicking Saturn's knee. Guerrero then continues the attack on the leg. Guerrero does his trademark slingshot somersault, this time on Saturn's knee. After a few more moves, Saturn is able to gain the advantage after turning a tornado DDT into a Northern Lights suplex. From there, Saturn starts throwing around Eddy with his T-Bone suplex and a Falcon Arrow, which of course the announcers don't know the name of. Saturn signals for the DVD, which brings out lWo members Damian 666 and Hector Garza. Saturn has little problem fighting them off, overhead belly-to-belly suplexing both of them quite nicely. This brings out the rest of the lWo, including a guy who nobody knows. The unknown man, who btw is Eddy's close personal friend Art Flores, uses a sweet brainbuster on Saturn, setting him up for a frog splash by Eddy. The lWo celebrates the beatdown of Saturn. Decent match, could of been better if given more time, but what can you do.
Gene-O is at the entrance ramp, he brings out Judy Bagwell. The crowd is on the edge of their seats with anticipation over what Buff's mom will say. Judy is tired of Buff's actions, and says that he has disgraced the Bagwell name. Brother Jeff is pissed at Buff, I am sure. Mrs. Bagwell goes on to say that she loves Marcus with all of her heart, but she's had enough of Buff. Me too, and he's only been on the show for a minute thus far.
The Giant and Stevie Ray come out representing the nWo against the newly-minted tag team Champions Rick Steiner and Kenny Kaos. Just because Kaos has to wrestle twice doesn't make it okay to subject us to two Stevie Ray matches in one night. Where's Bryan Adams when you need him? Predictably, the nWo beats up Kaos something fierce, or as fierce as the 550 pound Giant can at this point. To call him unmotivated is an understatement. Rick gets tagged in, hits a Steinerline for what looked like a three count but was only two, but the nWo take over again. Double team coming, but Kaos distracts the Giant, allowing Steiner to backdrop Stevie Ray. Steiner then hits a dangerous looking bulldog off the top on Stevie Ray and the champs retain. Good for them, although things would get worse once Steiner decided to make Judy Bagwell a tag team champion a few weeks later. Match was awful, however it was short at least.
Fireworks go off to signify the third hour of Nitro and to wake up the crowd after that last match. Eric Bischoff has replaced Tenay on commentary, which is a lateral move as far as I'm concerned. Bischoff says that he is a man of his word and we will see Flair wrestle, and he delivers, sort of. Instead of a live match, we get clips from Flair vs. Hulk Hogan at Bash at the Beach 1994, with all of the clips shown to make Flair look bad against the Hulkster. Well, technically, Bischoff didn't lie, but it's still crap. Mr. T and Shaquille O'Neal were there at ringside and Hogan wins with a legdrop and celebrates with the two. Bischoff says that this just shows that Flair will always be second best to the Hulkster. He asks the announcers how Flair looked, and Heenan says not too good, which causes Tony to scream at him. I bet Heenan just wanted to pop Schiavone on many days.
The Cruiserweight Title is on the line in this next match, as Juventud Guerrera takes on the champion, Billy Kidman, whose normally white shirt is now an ugly shade of gray. Wash your shirt, Kidman. This match was quite fun, as they start out fast and just pick up speed from there. A lot of two counts and great looking manuevers by these two wrestlers packed into six minutes. The end comes after Juvi learns you can't power bomb Kidman, as he counters with a Tiger Bomb, setting him up for a Shooting Star Press, which he landed perfectly for once. Kidman gets the win and the crowd shows its appreciation. Back to the announce table, where a Sting and Macho Man video are both plugged. Heenan tries to steal one of the videos, but Tony catches him in the act.
The nWo music plays for the 293rd time tonight, and this time Scott Steiner and son of Judy Bagwell come out. Steiner asks if the ladies love him for his mind or his body, and to that I say what mind? Bagwell is angry at his mother, and says that women belong at home cooking and cleaning. Buff than implores his dad to put Judy back in her place. So now Buff hates all women? Steiner than calls out J.J. Dillon to set up a match between him and his brother. Dillon comes out, says something about it being late in the show so you can't have your rematch. Steiner then says that he's an honest man but he has lied. Okay. Instead, Steiner has two questions for Dillon. One, why did the referee that started the match last night didn't finish the match, and two, well we never get that far as Dillon gets beaten up for failing to answer the first one correctly. Security tries to break it up, but Scott puts Dillon in the Steiner Recliner while Buff runs interference.
The Warrior's music plays, which the announcers act like they've never heard before even though the dude's been in the company for three months by now. Warrior gets a pretty good reaction from the crowd, and then proceed es to speak about how Hogan is a chicken or something. Warrior proceeds to drop an S-bomb during the interview. I don't think you can do that. He says Hogan has opened the door to Warrior's hell, and that he is the gatekeeper. Well good for you Warrior. Hogan comes out, followed quickly by Horace and Bischoff, and not so quickly by The Giant. Horace attacks first but gets clotheslined out of the ring for his trouble. The Giant comes in, but sufferes the same fate, but that allows Hogan to clubber on Warrior from behind. Warrior recovers, delivers a flying shoulder tackle to Hogan, and the Warrior stands tall in the ring. He wouldn't be in WCW much longer after this, however.
There's a commercial for WCW Bashin' Brawlers that is shown. Hey, I used to have some of those. They would scream out whenever you put pressure on a body part, for example, if you twist their arm, they would say "OW, you're hurting my left arm" They only made one for the big names, like Page, Savage, and Hogan. If only they made one for Van Hammer. The nWo music plays yet again, bringing out Scotts Hall and Steiner. Lex Luger and Konnan come out, and we have a tag match that quickly degenerates into an all-out brawl. Luger squares off with Hall while Steiner and Konnan fight. It's interesting that whenever one pair goes to the outside, the other pair go back to the inside of the ring. Well, maybe not interesting. Eventually, Luger hits Hall with the bionic forearm and signals for the Torture Rack, but Steiner comes to stop that with a low blow. Konnan brings a steel chair, and crushes Steiner on the head with it. Luger than jabs Hall with the chair. The two teams keep fighting until commercial, and the match is eventually declared a no-contest. Meh.
Michael Buffer is here to announce the main event, a match for the U.S. Title between DDP and the Champion Bret Hart. Buffer gets Hart's name right this time, something he has struggled with before. The two trade moves for a while, and it's a good back-and-forth affair between the two. Hart starts to take control after a Russian Leg Sweep and a DDT on DDP, which the announcers seemed to find funny. Hart gets a two after the DDT, and starts freaking out on Mickey Jay, which gives Page the opening to hit the Cactus Jack clothesline and a pancake. Page goes up top, but Hart catches him and superplexs his foe down to the mat. Only two, Page small packages Hart for two, but the Hitman regains control with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Flying elbow off the second rope by Hart, but Page gets out at two, which causes Hart to call Mickey Jay's mother a whore or something. Page takes Hart down with a Fujiwara armbar, but instead of holding on, he just lets go. That was awkward. Page gets Hart in the corner, bashes his head into the turnbuckle, but Hart manages to mule-kick both Page and the ref in the jewels. Hart digs out some knucks, revives the ref, but Page suddenly catches him with the Diamond Cutter. On this night, that would be enough, and we have a new U.S. Champion. This does not please Hart, as he gets a chair and starts attacking Page's leg with it. He puts DDP in the sharpshooter, which cause Page to scream in agony. Hart eventually tires of that, and goes back to bashing Page's leg with the chair before Goldberg comes out just as the show was ending. Good match, not great, but good.
Overall, this show was made a lot better due to the airing of Page-Goldberg, but even so it was still just an average show. At least there were two good matches in the final hour in Kidman-Juvi and Hart-Page, but all the nWo stuff was either boring or just plain dumb. I'll give this show an overall score of 4.89 out of 10. Tomorrow at The Canon Review, we pay tribute to Kenny Kaos, for no good reason whatsoever. But until then, if you have any better ideas for reviews, than send them to me either by leaving a comment or by e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com. Here's some videos from this episode of Nitro.
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Sunday, May 2, 2010
WCW Monday Nitro: December 22, 1997
Before we begin, I must give a belated plug to my friend Sonny Bone and the game that he made in a mere 48 hours, Savory Sea Hoss. The game is a lot of fun to play, and is probably better than some games that cost 48 dollars or more right now. So check it out here at http://www.ludumdare.com/compo/ludum-dare-17/?action=rate&uid=1365
This review is courtesy of an idea from reader Dickson S. who remembered this particular episode of Nitro quite well, although not very fondly, as this was the Nitro episode where the nWo took over with a new set and took about 30 minutes of air time putting it together. I remember switching to Raw for most of the night, as this show was ridiculous. But, I do what I am told, and so I have decided to watch and review this particular episode of Nitro, except for one match which I couldn't find posted anywhere on the internet. Since that match is Mongo McMichael vs. Meng, I'm going to assume I did not miss anything. On to the show.
We start with an announcement paid for by the nWo. How nice of them. This one features Eric Bischoff talking for three minutes about how he's going to beat up Larry Zbyszko and take over Nitro for the nWo at Starrcade, which is only six days away. Bischoff goes on about how quick he is, and how Zbyszko won't see his kicks coming, but he's going to feel them, oh yes, he's going to feel them. The video mercifullly ends, and we have a match, between Fit Finlay (Finley according to the on-screen graphics) and Eddie Guerrero (WCW Cruiser-weight Champion). This is a non-title match, and Finlay is still going with the brown mullet at this point in his career. The crowd seems to be behind Finlay because I guess they hate Guerrero more. This is a short match, but a good one, as Finlay was really fired up here per usual and Guerrero did more than enough to hold his own. Finlay used a stiff kick on Guerrero's face, and hit a nice superplex on his opponent as well, which got a nice pop from the crowd. Just when Finlay was about to tombstone him, Guerrero escapes and leaves the ring, as he's got a big match at Starrcade against Dean Malenko to prepare for, and he doesn't need this crap right now. Finlay wins by countout.
We get a video previewing the Giant Kevin Nash match that never happened at Starrcade, due to Nash having a hangnail or something. Both men promise to beat the other. Next is Mongo vs. Meng, and I couldn't find this match, so I'm just going to assume that Mongo won with a springboard dragonrana. Mean Gene is in the ring, and he introduces Diamond Dallas Page. Page comes down wearing a shirt that says "Deck the Hog" and is giving the fans some DDP shirts as an early Christmas gift. DDP says he loves Christmas "and that's a shoot". Quick, somebody take away his mic, DDP is SHOOTING!! He then says that he has a present for Curt Hennig this Sunday, and it's his very own Diamond Cutter. It remains to be seen if Hennig accepts this gift.
Up next is a six man tag match between the teams of La Parka, Psicosis, and Silver King against Rey Misterio Jr., Juventud Guerrera, and Hector Garza. Silver King's the only man I know that wears a belt with his wrestling trunks. Since these guys aren't given much time, they decide to not waste time and start flying around and across the ring immediately. Zbyszko theorizes that these men are so fast because they "ran from the federales' as kids". I think I'll just leave that alone. Everybody gets their chance to show off a move or two, including Hector Garza's awesome corkscrew plancha to the outside of the ring. Match ends when Rey sets Silver King up on the top turnbuckle, and then proceeds to give him a reverse huracanrana. He follows that up with a springboard huracanrana that went so fast Silver King may have suffered whiplash, and gets the three count. Short match, but very exciting.
Next we have Hammer from the Flock, making his return to TV match against Chris Benoit. Benoit says Hammer needs help, and he'll take on all of the Flock. Nobody ever said that Benoit was smart. Benoit takes control early, but after interference from Saturn, Hammer gains the advantage. Hammer nearly kills Benoit with an alley-oop powerbomb that was supposed to have Benoit bounce off the turnbuckle, but he came up just short. Benoit starts to take control again, which brings the entire Flock over the railing and eventually they get Hammer disqualified. Post-match, Saturn puts Benoit in the Rings of Saturn not once, but twice, and the announcers wonder if Benoit will make it to Starrcade.
You know, we haven't seen the, oh wait a minute, here comes the nWo. Well, actually, it's just the b-team of the nWo, and they proceed to chase the announcers off and force all of the remaining crew to wear "nWo Nitro" shirts. The crew then tries to remove anything on the set that says WCW on it and replace it with nWo stuff. Scott Norton and Vincent are the only two helping, while Rick Rude is calling the shots and Buff Bagwell is acting like an idiot. An nWo Nitro poster drops from the rafters, which prompts Buff to say "That sign's almost as buff as I am." How can a sign be buff, anyways? Buff goes to the ring, tries to force the ring announcer into wearing a shirt, but he refuses and gets tossed to the canvas for his efforts. Buff spraypaints the ring and holds a sign somebody made in honor or him. Rude screams "Pyro!, Pyro!, Fireworks! Fire...Works!) and some weak pyro goes off. There's an nWo Nitro sign that drops from the celing and completely blocks the entrance way. Smart planning guys. We go to commercial with some fan saying "Welcome to the nWo, Bret (Hart)" in a feminine manner.
The nWo Nitro intro plays, and Bischoff comes out on a motorcycle, presumably to gloat. He then introduces the rest of the nWo, including the big cheese himself, Hollywood Hogan, wearing sun glasses Elton John would consider ridiculous. Since it's almost Christmas, the nWo has some gifts for Hogan, including a motorcycle, which according to the production tech, is the "wrong one, Go*da**it". This is going off real well. They eventually bring the right bike out, which has Hogan's face and the nWo logo painted on it. How they got that bike confused with the regular black one, I'll never know. But wait, there's more, as an open roof stretch limo with a hot tub and two "nWo Nitro girls" is presented as another gift for Hogan. Geez, how much does this guy need? They should have given that stuff away to one lucky viewer, or three, for having to waste 30 minutes of their lives on this crap.
Finally, somebody from WCW shows up backstage, but it's J.J. Dillion, so he's not going to do anything. He tells Rick Steiner that he doesn't have to go out there to face Scott Norton due to the circumstances, but Steiner and manager Ted DiBiase say screw that mess, we're going out there anyway. So match on. The announcers are Eric Bischoff, which is bad, and Kevin Nash and Rick Rude, which are an improvement over the usual crew. They show a clip from last week of Norton botching a powerslam on Rick, driving Rick head first into the match. Rick seems ok, though, and starts with a punch and a Steinerline on Norton. The two trade heavy blows and power moves, and Rick actually belly-to-belly suplexes the much larger Norton over his head. The two botch an attempted belly-to-belly from Steiner off the top rope, however. Konnan comes out to attack Rick, causing the ref to disqualify Norton. That brings out Scott Steiner, which brings out Vincent, which in turn brings out Ray Traylor. The Steiners and Traylor clear the ring, and the nWo threesome say they'll get those guys at Starrcade on Sunday. Match was pretty blah and only about 3 minutes long.
The three nWo announcers talk about how Nash is going to squash The Giant at Starrcade, and Disco Inferno, the TV Champion comes out, much to the amusement of Nash and Rude. He's facing the U.S. Champion, Curt Hennig, in a non-title match. Naturally, the nWo puts Hennig over big-time, especially his buddy Rude, whose every word out of his mouth in this match is about how awesome Hennig is. Hennig controls most of this match, and is very methodical in his approach, but not too slow. Disco gets a couple of moves in, and even get a two count after a swinging neckbreaker. But Hennig puts an end to that flurry, and hit the Perfectplex on Disco for the win.
Bobby Heenan comes out, begging for an announcing job on nWo Nitro. Heenan sucks up to Bischoff in a way that is almost admirable. Guess that's why Lee Marshall calls him the "Weasel". Nash decides to let Heenan have his spot, and we are on to the next match, which is Harlem Heat vs. Lodi and Riggs. Bischoff and Rude are strangely complimentary of Harlem Heat, calling them one of the best tag teams in the world. Lodi and Riggs may be the worst tag team in the World, or at least the least likely to win any matches. Riggs and Booker T start, and the Heat have the advantage over Riggs, but it's not a total squash until Lodi gets tagged in. For the next four minutes, Lodi does not get one offensive move in, as the Heat dominate. Stevie Ray manages to use both the Pump Kick and the "Attitude Adjustment" on Lodi in this match, moves that are finishers in the WWE today. The end comes with the Harlem Heat's "Big Apple", which is like a Hart Attack, only instead of a clothesline, Booker T does a leaping superkick to his opponent's face. Oh, and for some reason Mike Tenay takes the commentary over for Bischoff in the middle of the match, so nWo Nitro is now being called by two WCW guys and Rick Rude. Go figure. Match was a beatdown of Lodi and just a showcase for Harlem Heat, which is strange considering that it's nWo Nitro and none of these teams are nWo.
Our next match is Chris Jericho vs. Buff Bagwell. Before that, I must say that this show feels like its seven hours long. Also, Konnan has been in the limo for the last 45 minutes, so at least he's enjoying himself.Anyway, Bagwell takes three minutes to get to the ring, and Jericho decides, what the hey, I'm going to kick Bagwell in the face for real. This should have been a better match than it was, but for whatever reason, these two just don't have any chemistry. At least Jericho got a couple of good moves in, and nearly got the three count after a double-underhook backbreaker. Match ends after Jericho attempts a top-rope huracanrana, flips, lands on his feet, only for Buff to catch him with the Blockbuster (neckbreaker where Bagwell flips over his opponent to deliver the move. Bagwell then beats up the referee because he called him fat or something. When is this show going to end?
Oh great, Bischoff and Hogan are back out. Hogan's going to get more gifts from the nWo. First of all, we have a replica of the WCW Heavyweight Title belt, made into a ring. It's big and gold and looks gaudy. Bischoff actually gets down on his knees like he's going to propose to Hogan before giving him the ring. I was hoping for a proposal, actually, as it would be much more interesting than this. But wait, there's more, as the nWo has prepared giant posters showing Hogan on the cover of Sports Illustrated (the only pro wrestler to accomplish that feat, by the way) and of Hogan choking Sylvester Stallone during Rocky III. Hogan acts overwhelmed with the kindness shown to him, while everyone in the crowd looks board. Except for the small contingent that started chanting "Rocky" after the second poster was shown. Mercifully we go to commercial break.
The nWo limo is being backed out of the arena for some reason, and mercifully it is time for our main event, Randy Savage vs. Lex Luger. The two decide to trade blows all around the ring, and then they brawl on the outside of the ring and even into the first row of the crowd as well. Luger takes control with a couple of running clotheslines, but accidentally nails the ref with the bionic forearm. This allows Savage to go to the outside and hide behind Elizabeth, and suddenly Buff comes out and nails Luger from behind. Nash comes out and Jacknifes Luger, and finally Savage finishes it off with a top rope elbow drop that had him fly three-quarters of the ring. Even at a late age, Savage still had the best elbow drop in wrestling. The ref wakes up just enough to count the pin, and Macho Man Randy Savage is the victor. Match was short and none too thrilling, like most of these matches tonight.
Damn it, Hogan and Bischoff come out again. Will Bischoff give Hogan a Hummer this time? Hogan talks about how Sting will go down in defeat at Starrcade when suddenly, another gift shows up. Bischoff looks confused, as he insists it's not from him. The limo comes back, and out comes Bret Hart, walking to the ring with a smirk on his face. Hogan opens up the gift, and it's a paper mache' of his own head. Hogan acts like he's seen The Ultimate Warrior in a mirror, and Sting ziplines from the entrance way as the show comes to an end. The hell? I'm confused, maybe you can watch this and tell me what happens.
This show was painful to watch. The first hour was decent, but everything after the six-man tag sucked on ice and made me want to bang my head against Mount Rushmore. Keep in mind two things here, one, this was the last show before Starrcade, only being promoted as the biggest show in WCW's history at the time with the most anticipated main event WCW has probably ever had, and they promote the show as being a tribute to Hogan and a takeover by the nWo which left the opposition looking like a bunch of spineless fools. Also, they made an entirely new set, which I'm sure was not cheap to produce, and this is the only show where any of that stuff and any of the T-shirts were used. Just an awful show, and unfortunately, would only be the first of many bad decisions made by WCW over the next few months. I'll give it a 1.5 out of 10, as the only entertaining parts were the six-man tag, Guerrero-Finlay, and Rick Rude demanding fireworks.
Well, thanks for reading. If you have any ideas for future posts, than let me know either by leaving a comment or by sending me an e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com.
This review is courtesy of an idea from reader Dickson S. who remembered this particular episode of Nitro quite well, although not very fondly, as this was the Nitro episode where the nWo took over with a new set and took about 30 minutes of air time putting it together. I remember switching to Raw for most of the night, as this show was ridiculous. But, I do what I am told, and so I have decided to watch and review this particular episode of Nitro, except for one match which I couldn't find posted anywhere on the internet. Since that match is Mongo McMichael vs. Meng, I'm going to assume I did not miss anything. On to the show.
We start with an announcement paid for by the nWo. How nice of them. This one features Eric Bischoff talking for three minutes about how he's going to beat up Larry Zbyszko and take over Nitro for the nWo at Starrcade, which is only six days away. Bischoff goes on about how quick he is, and how Zbyszko won't see his kicks coming, but he's going to feel them, oh yes, he's going to feel them. The video mercifullly ends, and we have a match, between Fit Finlay (Finley according to the on-screen graphics) and Eddie Guerrero (WCW Cruiser-weight Champion). This is a non-title match, and Finlay is still going with the brown mullet at this point in his career. The crowd seems to be behind Finlay because I guess they hate Guerrero more. This is a short match, but a good one, as Finlay was really fired up here per usual and Guerrero did more than enough to hold his own. Finlay used a stiff kick on Guerrero's face, and hit a nice superplex on his opponent as well, which got a nice pop from the crowd. Just when Finlay was about to tombstone him, Guerrero escapes and leaves the ring, as he's got a big match at Starrcade against Dean Malenko to prepare for, and he doesn't need this crap right now. Finlay wins by countout.
We get a video previewing the Giant Kevin Nash match that never happened at Starrcade, due to Nash having a hangnail or something. Both men promise to beat the other. Next is Mongo vs. Meng, and I couldn't find this match, so I'm just going to assume that Mongo won with a springboard dragonrana. Mean Gene is in the ring, and he introduces Diamond Dallas Page. Page comes down wearing a shirt that says "Deck the Hog" and is giving the fans some DDP shirts as an early Christmas gift. DDP says he loves Christmas "and that's a shoot". Quick, somebody take away his mic, DDP is SHOOTING!! He then says that he has a present for Curt Hennig this Sunday, and it's his very own Diamond Cutter. It remains to be seen if Hennig accepts this gift.
Up next is a six man tag match between the teams of La Parka, Psicosis, and Silver King against Rey Misterio Jr., Juventud Guerrera, and Hector Garza. Silver King's the only man I know that wears a belt with his wrestling trunks. Since these guys aren't given much time, they decide to not waste time and start flying around and across the ring immediately. Zbyszko theorizes that these men are so fast because they "ran from the federales' as kids". I think I'll just leave that alone. Everybody gets their chance to show off a move or two, including Hector Garza's awesome corkscrew plancha to the outside of the ring. Match ends when Rey sets Silver King up on the top turnbuckle, and then proceeds to give him a reverse huracanrana. He follows that up with a springboard huracanrana that went so fast Silver King may have suffered whiplash, and gets the three count. Short match, but very exciting.
Next we have Hammer from the Flock, making his return to TV match against Chris Benoit. Benoit says Hammer needs help, and he'll take on all of the Flock. Nobody ever said that Benoit was smart. Benoit takes control early, but after interference from Saturn, Hammer gains the advantage. Hammer nearly kills Benoit with an alley-oop powerbomb that was supposed to have Benoit bounce off the turnbuckle, but he came up just short. Benoit starts to take control again, which brings the entire Flock over the railing and eventually they get Hammer disqualified. Post-match, Saturn puts Benoit in the Rings of Saturn not once, but twice, and the announcers wonder if Benoit will make it to Starrcade.
You know, we haven't seen the, oh wait a minute, here comes the nWo. Well, actually, it's just the b-team of the nWo, and they proceed to chase the announcers off and force all of the remaining crew to wear "nWo Nitro" shirts. The crew then tries to remove anything on the set that says WCW on it and replace it with nWo stuff. Scott Norton and Vincent are the only two helping, while Rick Rude is calling the shots and Buff Bagwell is acting like an idiot. An nWo Nitro poster drops from the rafters, which prompts Buff to say "That sign's almost as buff as I am." How can a sign be buff, anyways? Buff goes to the ring, tries to force the ring announcer into wearing a shirt, but he refuses and gets tossed to the canvas for his efforts. Buff spraypaints the ring and holds a sign somebody made in honor or him. Rude screams "Pyro!, Pyro!, Fireworks! Fire...Works!) and some weak pyro goes off. There's an nWo Nitro sign that drops from the celing and completely blocks the entrance way. Smart planning guys. We go to commercial with some fan saying "Welcome to the nWo, Bret (Hart)" in a feminine manner.
The nWo Nitro intro plays, and Bischoff comes out on a motorcycle, presumably to gloat. He then introduces the rest of the nWo, including the big cheese himself, Hollywood Hogan, wearing sun glasses Elton John would consider ridiculous. Since it's almost Christmas, the nWo has some gifts for Hogan, including a motorcycle, which according to the production tech, is the "wrong one, Go*da**it". This is going off real well. They eventually bring the right bike out, which has Hogan's face and the nWo logo painted on it. How they got that bike confused with the regular black one, I'll never know. But wait, there's more, as an open roof stretch limo with a hot tub and two "nWo Nitro girls" is presented as another gift for Hogan. Geez, how much does this guy need? They should have given that stuff away to one lucky viewer, or three, for having to waste 30 minutes of their lives on this crap.
Finally, somebody from WCW shows up backstage, but it's J.J. Dillion, so he's not going to do anything. He tells Rick Steiner that he doesn't have to go out there to face Scott Norton due to the circumstances, but Steiner and manager Ted DiBiase say screw that mess, we're going out there anyway. So match on. The announcers are Eric Bischoff, which is bad, and Kevin Nash and Rick Rude, which are an improvement over the usual crew. They show a clip from last week of Norton botching a powerslam on Rick, driving Rick head first into the match. Rick seems ok, though, and starts with a punch and a Steinerline on Norton. The two trade heavy blows and power moves, and Rick actually belly-to-belly suplexes the much larger Norton over his head. The two botch an attempted belly-to-belly from Steiner off the top rope, however. Konnan comes out to attack Rick, causing the ref to disqualify Norton. That brings out Scott Steiner, which brings out Vincent, which in turn brings out Ray Traylor. The Steiners and Traylor clear the ring, and the nWo threesome say they'll get those guys at Starrcade on Sunday. Match was pretty blah and only about 3 minutes long.
The three nWo announcers talk about how Nash is going to squash The Giant at Starrcade, and Disco Inferno, the TV Champion comes out, much to the amusement of Nash and Rude. He's facing the U.S. Champion, Curt Hennig, in a non-title match. Naturally, the nWo puts Hennig over big-time, especially his buddy Rude, whose every word out of his mouth in this match is about how awesome Hennig is. Hennig controls most of this match, and is very methodical in his approach, but not too slow. Disco gets a couple of moves in, and even get a two count after a swinging neckbreaker. But Hennig puts an end to that flurry, and hit the Perfectplex on Disco for the win.
Bobby Heenan comes out, begging for an announcing job on nWo Nitro. Heenan sucks up to Bischoff in a way that is almost admirable. Guess that's why Lee Marshall calls him the "Weasel". Nash decides to let Heenan have his spot, and we are on to the next match, which is Harlem Heat vs. Lodi and Riggs. Bischoff and Rude are strangely complimentary of Harlem Heat, calling them one of the best tag teams in the world. Lodi and Riggs may be the worst tag team in the World, or at least the least likely to win any matches. Riggs and Booker T start, and the Heat have the advantage over Riggs, but it's not a total squash until Lodi gets tagged in. For the next four minutes, Lodi does not get one offensive move in, as the Heat dominate. Stevie Ray manages to use both the Pump Kick and the "Attitude Adjustment" on Lodi in this match, moves that are finishers in the WWE today. The end comes with the Harlem Heat's "Big Apple", which is like a Hart Attack, only instead of a clothesline, Booker T does a leaping superkick to his opponent's face. Oh, and for some reason Mike Tenay takes the commentary over for Bischoff in the middle of the match, so nWo Nitro is now being called by two WCW guys and Rick Rude. Go figure. Match was a beatdown of Lodi and just a showcase for Harlem Heat, which is strange considering that it's nWo Nitro and none of these teams are nWo.
Our next match is Chris Jericho vs. Buff Bagwell. Before that, I must say that this show feels like its seven hours long. Also, Konnan has been in the limo for the last 45 minutes, so at least he's enjoying himself.Anyway, Bagwell takes three minutes to get to the ring, and Jericho decides, what the hey, I'm going to kick Bagwell in the face for real. This should have been a better match than it was, but for whatever reason, these two just don't have any chemistry. At least Jericho got a couple of good moves in, and nearly got the three count after a double-underhook backbreaker. Match ends after Jericho attempts a top-rope huracanrana, flips, lands on his feet, only for Buff to catch him with the Blockbuster (neckbreaker where Bagwell flips over his opponent to deliver the move. Bagwell then beats up the referee because he called him fat or something. When is this show going to end?
Oh great, Bischoff and Hogan are back out. Hogan's going to get more gifts from the nWo. First of all, we have a replica of the WCW Heavyweight Title belt, made into a ring. It's big and gold and looks gaudy. Bischoff actually gets down on his knees like he's going to propose to Hogan before giving him the ring. I was hoping for a proposal, actually, as it would be much more interesting than this. But wait, there's more, as the nWo has prepared giant posters showing Hogan on the cover of Sports Illustrated (the only pro wrestler to accomplish that feat, by the way) and of Hogan choking Sylvester Stallone during Rocky III. Hogan acts overwhelmed with the kindness shown to him, while everyone in the crowd looks board. Except for the small contingent that started chanting "Rocky" after the second poster was shown. Mercifully we go to commercial break.
The nWo limo is being backed out of the arena for some reason, and mercifully it is time for our main event, Randy Savage vs. Lex Luger. The two decide to trade blows all around the ring, and then they brawl on the outside of the ring and even into the first row of the crowd as well. Luger takes control with a couple of running clotheslines, but accidentally nails the ref with the bionic forearm. This allows Savage to go to the outside and hide behind Elizabeth, and suddenly Buff comes out and nails Luger from behind. Nash comes out and Jacknifes Luger, and finally Savage finishes it off with a top rope elbow drop that had him fly three-quarters of the ring. Even at a late age, Savage still had the best elbow drop in wrestling. The ref wakes up just enough to count the pin, and Macho Man Randy Savage is the victor. Match was short and none too thrilling, like most of these matches tonight.
Damn it, Hogan and Bischoff come out again. Will Bischoff give Hogan a Hummer this time? Hogan talks about how Sting will go down in defeat at Starrcade when suddenly, another gift shows up. Bischoff looks confused, as he insists it's not from him. The limo comes back, and out comes Bret Hart, walking to the ring with a smirk on his face. Hogan opens up the gift, and it's a paper mache' of his own head. Hogan acts like he's seen The Ultimate Warrior in a mirror, and Sting ziplines from the entrance way as the show comes to an end. The hell? I'm confused, maybe you can watch this and tell me what happens.
This show was painful to watch. The first hour was decent, but everything after the six-man tag sucked on ice and made me want to bang my head against Mount Rushmore. Keep in mind two things here, one, this was the last show before Starrcade, only being promoted as the biggest show in WCW's history at the time with the most anticipated main event WCW has probably ever had, and they promote the show as being a tribute to Hogan and a takeover by the nWo which left the opposition looking like a bunch of spineless fools. Also, they made an entirely new set, which I'm sure was not cheap to produce, and this is the only show where any of that stuff and any of the T-shirts were used. Just an awful show, and unfortunately, would only be the first of many bad decisions made by WCW over the next few months. I'll give it a 1.5 out of 10, as the only entertaining parts were the six-man tag, Guerrero-Finlay, and Rick Rude demanding fireworks.
Well, thanks for reading. If you have any ideas for future posts, than let me know either by leaving a comment or by sending me an e-mail at KtheC2001@gmail.com.
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